Personality Cafe banner

1 - 8 of 8 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
749 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
Is it the purest form of criticism out there?

For example, a friend o' mine is an INTJ. One night I drank too much and ate my girlfriends decorative bathroom soaps after I had blacked out. I made that poor girl regret not taking the apartment key she gave me with her when she flew places so many times. But digressions aside upon explaining this to my INTJ friend he informed me that, "You're fuckin' retarded, buddy."

There are many times when I have a proposed an idea and if he thinks ill of it he calls it stupid, just like that. While I'm not offended by any means. It leaves me wondering: With you guys is it really just like a snap call, ie, "that's stupid," and that's all there is to it? Pure business and nothing else? Or is there a hint of ire with it? As I've grown to suspect from time to time?

For some reason I just can't get a feel for you guys whether or not an insult is an insult, honest criticism, a playful insult, it all seems to sound the same. My INTJ friend literally cannot facetiously be like, "Hey ya douche bag." If he said that I would think he thought me a douche bag.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
1,956 Posts
While I cannot speak for all INTJs I can tell you about me.

I am 100% business about business that being said I don't have a mean bone in my body and I really really hate it when someone puts another person down. But.. I do think some ideas are not well thought out. I spend a great deal of my time knowing what I know and I'm an expert in that little tiny sliver. I would never claim more knowledge than I have so if I don't know something I will fess right up.

Short answer - we are curt with illogical ideas. Did that help?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
94 Posts
I usually don't call people stupid. I will call ideas or actions stupid. If I say it-- I mean it, no hidden meaning is to be inferred.

Just because an idea is stupid does not mean the person who came up with it is. The more ideas you have, the more likely you are to have brilliant ideas-- and stupid ones.
 
  • Like
Reactions: TurquoiseSunset

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,605 Posts
I agree with the above posts. I would also add, that criticisms of ideas should not be taken too personally (as an INTP, I doubt this will be a problem for you.) INTJs feel compelled to point out flaws in ideas and systems; its just part of who we are. Also while jack london's attitude sounds healthy, many other less mature INTJs succumb to their own intellectual arrogance and feel at ease dismissing even good ideas in fields they have little or no expertise in simply because said ideas do not align with their own preconceptions.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
532 Posts
I agree with what all of the other posters have said. If I think an idea is 'stupid' I will say I don't agree and give my reasons, but I will not call them or their ideas stupid. That's just mean.

For the most part I say exactly what I mean, and mean what I say.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
99 Posts
I can relate to your friend. As an INTJ, we can be very critical on many things friends, random strangers or even family members. But it's nothing personal, it's pure honesty. However, it's not my problem if people get offended by my words; it's theirs. If you can't handle the truth, then what else would you use? hand gestures?
 
1 - 8 of 8 Posts
Top