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So today I had been looking forward to seeing my ENFP closest friend for the first time in months (b/c of school pretty much), partially excited to see what he's learned and being able to share some of my discoveries as well. Generally when we see each other it's usually exciting and I feel like I fit in even if it's with others that I may or may not know, as generally he seems to be one of the few that can keep my emotions feeling grounded and welcome. This time did not seem to be the case..as I realized that our long separation and exposure to new experiences has changed us a lot more than I thought. The entire day, even when it was just 2 of us, I could not feel like I could muster a thought..and this is unnatural to me, as I usually have plenty of things to tell him, without issue. I also noticed that we could not communicate well among each other unless we had someone else there to help continue conversations with different topics (ex. By ourselves we would be speaking a little but we both could not hold a conversation as well as before but when there's a third person it becomes much easier). And between this, I felt a strong urge of loneliness inside of me, even with his presence and others later on. I know he is not intentionally communicating little with me, because it appeared we were both struggling to initiate and hold one.
The entire day that I hung out I could not rid myself of this blasted feeling, and I was curious as to why this feeling came about..and how hanging out this time was different from all the others. Could it be that we've changed so much that we're slowly drifting? As it's not an uncommon thing, but I don't know what that feels like as I haven't had anyone close to me before that accompanied this feeling. And this change isn't changing my opinion of him overall..so i'm still at a loss as to why I still feel this new sense of loneliness..maybe it's nostalgia and the idea of bringing back how we were in the past? I'm not really sure, and this is just speculation. And take note, i've never had this problem before, even though we had much different viewpoints and interests on things we could still have great conversations and accept each other. But now it feels like the greatness of those conversations have vanished..
Anyone have any ideas on what this might be? Unfortunately, there's no problem to resolve but i'm still confused about this feeling and how this slight change in character has caused a much larger impact on our friendship..
The entire day that I hung out I could not rid myself of this blasted feeling, and I was curious as to why this feeling came about..and how hanging out this time was different from all the others. Could it be that we've changed so much that we're slowly drifting? As it's not an uncommon thing, but I don't know what that feels like as I haven't had anyone close to me before that accompanied this feeling. And this change isn't changing my opinion of him overall..so i'm still at a loss as to why I still feel this new sense of loneliness..maybe it's nostalgia and the idea of bringing back how we were in the past? I'm not really sure, and this is just speculation. And take note, i've never had this problem before, even though we had much different viewpoints and interests on things we could still have great conversations and accept each other. But now it feels like the greatness of those conversations have vanished..
Anyone have any ideas on what this might be? Unfortunately, there's no problem to resolve but i'm still confused about this feeling and how this slight change in character has caused a much larger impact on our friendship..