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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
ive only came across a single person who resembled more than one enneagram, so for some time ive doubted its existence.

this person acted completely on 4w3 motives, but did it the 8w7 way.

for a few years, i now recognize, that ive been acting on 4w3 motive myself, unable to even remotely relate with who i was before that change. its like i changed into someone else. i suspect, who i really am is 5w4.

and even though i studied ennea, i wasnt able to point out that i was operating on 4w3 mode until now, that im somewhat able to introspect again.

so, what happens to people when they get stuck on their fix?
what happened to me, is, that i completely lost contact to my internal world, went all focus on achieving as best self image as i could, so i would earn my place in humanity. this focus at one point had exhausted me so much, that i did nothing but sleep 18 hour streaks, eat, shower, sleep, and so on.

when i was on my way to lose my internal world, at one point, i noted that im going insane, but i thought mental problems are a very small and insignificant in comparison to the problem that caused me to go that way. (a permanent injury) i guess ive always had strong mentality, so i thought insanity is nothing. how arrogant of me.

now that im waking up from my coma, its like i realize someone else has been using my body for the past few years. its like i need to eradicate this someone elses values from my head so i could return to myself.

anyone else has experiences with being on fix, or knows people like that?
 

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I go 6w7 -> 3w4 -> 9w1


6w7: Start off latching onto groups, being a tag-along

3w4: I notice the 6 mechanisms aren't getting me anywhere, so i start focusing on work and career.

9w1: Once I fail or feel that I'm hopeless/unloveable, I become apathetic for a while; I avoid friends and any social interaction out of embarassment and give up on all of my personal goals to eat cheetohs and fantasize about my ideal life.
 
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