Personality Cafe banner

1 - 19 of 19 Posts

·
Banned
Joined
·
3,725 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
When the vision is gone, when you can no longer stand on top of the mountain and see the forest and all the obstacles that stand on your way. All you see at the moment is this wall and can't realize it's just a maze. You're stuck on the wall thinking that that is the end of the journey. You want to go back, but you can't go back either because you took a path with no road. The only way out is either through, or stagnate.

Have you ever reached this situation? How have you gotten out of it?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,545 Posts
Yes life seemed to have stopped, not moving forward and there were no changes just the same negative things. It turned out to be just my perception of the situation just like Archlight said. When I stopped just looking at the negative elements and resenting the life situation, it was like I could "see" clearer, life was moving, there were many positive elements I did not see before that already existed. I have a whole new outlook on life, there are many beautiful things I am discovering and looking forward for many others.

There is no wall, it is just in the mind, bend the mind to see various roads ahead :p
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
3,725 Posts
Discussion Starter #4
Yes.. I change the only thing I can.. Myself.
You know Arclight, I'm not a very cowardly or fearful person. However, I will admit that there is one thing that scares the crap out of me, and you know what that is? Really looking at myself and dealing with who I am inside. Every time I dwell and go inside myself, it's like finding myself in a dark cave in where I know a ugly and evil monster lurks. I once found myself deep into the cave, and in it, I realized that I am not a good person. That was a slap in the face! That's what makes this monster really evil, he tells you the truth about who you are, no bullshit. However, I have a feeling that in order to change myself as you advice, I'm going to have to make truce with this creature, and perhaps make him my ally. I feel like pissing my pants when I think about it, but in the game of life there are no shortcuts and no one else will be there to save you.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,610 Posts
I just keep struggling through, not giving up. I might do very little at times, barely surviving, but as time passes circumstances change. And as circumstances change sometimes opportunities make themselves known or you just start feeling better.
 

·
Fu Dominant
Joined
·
10,720 Posts
A stack of TNT, redstone wiring, and a pressure plate can generally get through any wall that isn't made of obsidian or bedrock. That set up can also make getting through mazes a bit easier as well. ;o)




Minecraft reference ftw!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
21 Posts
This is how I rescue myself when my right brain takes over, I make my left brain do a little work.

What I do is:

Evaluate whether the vision is worth keeping. Imagine what life would feel like without it. Is the payoff worth the effort? It might just be time to let it go, and let a new one arrive. I find life meaningless without a vision.

Sometimes I can get so deep & side-tracked with the details that I lose sight of the big picture. That leaves me floundering. I have to step back and try to remember the WHY of that vision and grab on to that. Give myself a frame of reference for when I get lost. Post it on the wall, if necessary, to remind myself. And every once in a while ask whether I am still moving towards that goal.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,500 Posts
It's mostly like a raft going down a river, you just need to paddle from the shore a little bit... Ni has a tendency to do this...kind of wobbly.
Look at things, motives, ideas that you keep coming back to for years... and try to disregard fleeting thoughts that don't match up. In times of stress we can act unnecessarily on Se impulses.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,876 Posts
You know Arclight, I'm not a very cowardly or fearful person. However, I will admit that there is one thing that scares the crap out of me, and you know what that is? Really looking at myself and dealing with who I am inside. Every time I dwell and go inside myself, it's like finding myself in a dark cave in where I know a ugly and evil monster lurks. I once found myself deep into the cave, and in it, I realized that I am not a good person. That was a slap in the face! That's what makes this monster really evil, he tells you the truth about who you are, no bullshit. However, I have a feeling that in order to change myself as you advice, I'm going to have to make truce with this creature, and perhaps make him my ally. I feel like pissing my pants when I think about it, but in the game of life there are no shortcuts and no one else will be there to save you.
The first thing you can do is forgive yourself.. Then it might be wise to reconcile yourself.. This is not some separate entity deep inside.. It's you.
You are correct that you will not reach any of your potential until you know yourself.
You do not have to be this side of you.. But it is very important to know how much influence it has and how it actually benefits you.
Did I mention it's OK and you need to forgive yourself?

Something else.. Whatever you have done that you might classify as evil.. (Is there any proof of that? Probably not).
Well you can't change the past.. But that's all it is.. You are defined by who you are right now. You are not who you were anymore.
All you have to do to let go of who you were is to stop doing it. Did you lie.. I am sure you did.. But that doesn't mean you are a liar even if the person you lied to might have other ideas.. The fact? You told a lie. Last time I looked no one was perfect.. You aren't a Liar if you are not lying even if you have lied.
Redemption is in not lying anymore.
Being a fuck up and fucking up tells us who we are not and who we don't want to be. So then don't do it and you wont be it.
But the potential will always be there. So what? Be who you are and who you can be, not who you were. That's what growing is all about.
Does that make sense?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
162 Posts
The first thing you can do is forgive yourself.. Then it might be wise to reconcile yourself.. This is not some separate entity deep inside.. It's you.
You are correct that you will not reach any of your potential until you know yourself.
You do not have to be this side of you.. But it is very important to know how much influence it has and how it actually benefits you.
Did I mention it's OK and you need to forgive yourself?

Something else.. Whatever you have done that you might classify as evil.. (Is there any proof of that? Probably not).
Well you can't change the past.. But that's all it is.. You are defined by who you are right now. You are not who you were anymore.
All you have to do to let go of who you were is to stop doing it. Did you lie.. I am sure you did.. But that doesn't mean you are a liar even if the person you lied to might have other ideas.. The fact? You told a lie. Last time I looked no one was perfect.. You aren't a Liar if you are not lying even if you have lied.
Redemption is in not lying anymore.
Being a fuck up and fucking up tells us who we are not and who we don't want to be. So then don't do it and you wont be it.
But the potential will always be there. So what? Be who you are and who you can be, not who you were. That's what growing is all about.
Does that make sense?
@Iconoclastic Visionary I was in the middle of typing this exact same advice until I scrolled a little further to read the rest of the replies. I agree completely with Arclight. The first step always comes in accepting everything in its entirety, because your flaws too, along with your strengths, are you. When you come to understand it and accept it for what it is, it's like your world becomes a lot lighter.

And @Arclight , you know, I deeply wish that I had a friend who had told me exactly what you said. But I also know that there, too, is an immeasurable value to the lessons one learns by him or herself. Still, there's a form of comfort hearing someone speak the same words as I--- a sort of comfort that I made the right conclusions.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
3,725 Posts
Discussion Starter #11
Does that make sense?
Yes. It makes lots of sense. I guess I've been trying to fight off a demon that I believed was separate from me but all this time I have been fighting myself. And like you and Llamarider said, I haven't fully forgiven myself.

Thanks for your words, and everyone else's. Deep thoughts in here, I appreciate it.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
970 Posts
When the vision is gone, when you can no longer stand on top of the mountain and see the forest and all the obstacles that stand on your way. All you see at the moment is this wall and can't realize it's just a maze. You're stuck on the wall thinking that that is the end of the journey. You want to go back, but you can't go back either because you took a path with no road. The only way out is either through, or stagnate.

Have you ever reached this situation? How have you gotten out of it?
Build camp.
Wait for daylight.
Find a new maze and a new escape.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
215 Posts
According to Jung's protege Dr. von Franz, the shadows inside ourselves are our inferior functions.

With Ni dominants that have inferior Se, the best way back to equilibrium would probably be sleep, to rest the unconsciously overcompensating Se.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
7,289 Posts
All problems are resolved with time, one way or another.

In fact a "problem" or obstacle is simply an illusion created by us. We define our goal as so important; therefore, whatever interferes or stands in the way of our goal is seen as a difficulty to overcome.

People almost invariably create their own problems and then feel obligated to deal with them... which is fine, just be aware of who created the problem.

If you live more in the moment, problems seem to evaporate because the wall before you is not an obstacle, it's just a wall. Why should it not be there?

In my life, I do what I will, and operate on a belief in destiny. If I am to do something, then reality will align so I achieve it. If I am not meant to do something, then no amount of exertion on my part will have an affect.

The path of least resistance is the right one I think. Which doesn't mean my path seems easy to walk... it might very well be the most difficult path one could choose... what it does mean is that as I walk along the path, obstacles yield to my presence and a solution always presents itself.

Granted, I believe I have divine help every step of the way.

This is a wonderful bit of knowledge once uttered by a swami that I will now paraphrase: I most certainly cannot accomplish this feat before me, but God can, and so through me, God will do his wondrous work.

Then life becomes a question of whether or not I should do something in the present moment. It's not an intricate planned process that can be thwarted by this or that.

Yet I've not perfected it, so I still have "problems" just like everyone else. I look forward to the day that I don't.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
23 Posts
When the vision is gone, when you can no longer stand on top of the mountain and see the forest and all the obstacles that stand on your way. All you see at the moment is this wall and can't realize it's just a maze. You're stuck on the wall thinking that that is the end of the journey. You want to go back, but you can't go back either because you took a path with no road. The only way out is either through, or stagnate.

Have you ever reached this situation? How have you gotten out of it?
Change your personal philosophy.

1) Do what you love.
2) Believe in yourself.
3) You will die one day. Keep moving forward.

Simple. To the point. Effective.
 

·
Registered
INFJ 6w5, 1w2, 2w1 Sx/Sp
Joined
·
10,471 Posts
Realizing that you are not a good person is half the battle (no one is "good"). It's interesting that you should say this, "That's what makes this monster really evil, he tells you the truth about who you are, no bullshit." Someone who tells you the truth isn't evil. The truth sets you free. But I think you realize that now since you said you're going to make "him" your ally.

So many people go through their lives believing themselves to be righteous and yet rot lurks on the inside. The ones who are not this way have realized this ugliness exists within themselves and constantly battle it every day. I know pride can be a bitch. In my case, that's the reason I initially didn't want to believe I wasn't really a good person but when I saw the truth of it, it was so much sweeter than my damn pride and it's not worth indulging in self pity over either because that is also ugly and selfish. This is what it means to grow. I know it can be scary at first but the pay off is worth it because you can finally grow into someone beautiful and meet your full potential.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
3,725 Posts
Discussion Starter #17
@Razare

That was a well written post, thanks. And yes, I've found myself in bliss when I have truly only contemplated the here and now of my existence without having to worry about past regrets and future anxieties. However, it's not so long before my thinking mind takes over, and the short-lived contentment and peace of the present is soon replaced by the dreadful confusion of trying to look everywhere and nowhere for an answer of where I stand now, and why I am not where I'm supposed to be.

I've observed that by thinking about the future and keeping the past alive, my ego is trying to keep itself alive by either thinking of all the wonderful and exciting possibilities of the future, or by going to the other extreme of presenting me with a grim and hopeless representation based on past patterns of how this future will turn out. And I must admit, my ego is huge, though it is not as apparent as others since it's not an outwardly expressive ego, but rather a conceptual one. And it's funny that you mentioned the present moment, because it is at this space when I can really see who I am, and who I am not. I can really see this creature in real time, trying again and again to identify with it, and let me say, it always wins. Maybe the ego's desire to survive is stronger than my own, that's why it always wins.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Razare

·
Banned
Joined
·
3,725 Posts
Discussion Starter #18
@Vivid Melody

I was reluctant to even utter the word "evil" to describe this metaphorical monster, but I think I chose it because that's the adjective that a frightened little ego would choose to describe it. Deep inside, however, I take pity and even empathize with this ego of mine because I know how it feels to feel so vulnerable in the face of truth, while, like you said, shall set me free, also has the potential to unmask all the nastiness that was covered throughout this time. However, there came a time when I got tired of placing the dirt under the rug so to speak, so little by little I began to wipe it away.

Sometimes I feel like I'm writing from two different perspectives, that is why words get thrown out that to the outsider may seem absurd. Deeply inside I strive for the truth, but there's always this part of me that distorts everything I strive for and leaves me wondering if I truly am who I think I am.

But don't listen to me, I'm just weird :p Thank you for your words.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Vivid Melody

·
Banned
Joined
·
7,289 Posts
@Iconoclastic Visionary - Yeah, it's a difficult struggle to see things in that perspective.

I've been swinging from one perspective to another. It seems whenever you achieve that peace, something arises to test it! GL
 
1 - 19 of 19 Posts
Top