I like to go to the park or the beach and read. Just being outside in the fresh air (minus the cig) makes me feel really good. Also, I find I get "off center" when I have been around people too much so usually if I keep to myself for a bit i rejuvenate.
- Write my thoughts down as quickly as they erupt.
- Speak with my INFP friend. Our lives are freakishly on the same wave length. She often has the same realizations as I at the same times, though we currently reside in different states, and comparing them helps restore my senses in knowing that I'm not alone in thinking in such a way.
- Pour myself a glass of whiskey and watch a good movie or listen to some records to take my mind off of things.
- Go for a long run.
- Retreat to nature and read a good book, I resort to this the most often. Nature clears my mind and reading realigns my thoughts.
I ran into this bit of a poem (not sure who wrote it) regarding this in Persian:
دنیا دو روز است"
یک روز با تو و روز دیگر علیه تو
روزی که با توست مغرور مشو و روزی که علیه توست ناامید مگرد
".زیرا هر دو پایان پذیرند
A rough translation of this would be as follows:
"Life is two days:
One day it is with you and the other against.
Do not become arrogant when it is with you, nor be down when it turns against,
For both of these days will certainly end."
The knowledge that I am in a bad mood (rather than things actually being bad) is enough to make me feel better, for the most part. Why despair when I know that I will feel capable and positive within a few days at most?
go out for coffee... colonics, find an angry feminist to tenderize my back (word to the wise... avoid the happy ending), time travel by music (yes, let's trip through the past to a place that was more miserable than I am now.), go on a nature hike and play is that shroom edible or can it make me high, playing whack-a-mole or just whacking it, video games, updating my high art (and low porn) galleries, fat chicks in party hats and cats say the darnest things, spin classes (nothing like cycling for 18 miles but remaining in the same place), plotting for my future and the destruction of my colleagues, art stuff, music stuff, setting my sophomoric creations on fire... losing my shit, venting online, and repressing it in the real world so I can have that early aneurysm I've always wanted.
I have headphones in my ear most of the day. The times I do feel bleh is stuck in a loop doing daydreaming and PerC while waiting for system queries to catch up.
The times I feel the MOST bleh is when my superiors tell me to do the wrong shit, i warned them of the consequences, goes ignored, and i wind up having to clean the mess i predicted that happens... then I'm like... you.... fuckfaces...
Quite often, I think they do that deliberately to piss me off... and if it doesn't go as I predicted and shit works, they'll shove it in front of my face... what's worse is if it does work for a short period of time before it breaks and my prediction is accurate, I STILL have to wind up cleaning the mess that happens.
Great! I made it to a corporation stuck in a dead end position cleaning virtual toilets of system issues while people who makes the so-called 'hard decisions' gets to reap in the recognition, credit, and cash. There has got to be an alternative way without having to resort to becoming assholes like them. I refuse to believe that's the only option and that's to become one of them.
When bleh-ness turns to angst... fine line of tolerance and patience put to the test.
Today, for example, I went out for a walk, sat down for a bit at a broad place where a lot of people practice street sports, or what's the expression, and after a while I started kicking my footbag around, in some time people started to join in. That's just one of the possibilities.
I usually just listen to music for a while, or do something that doesn't require any kind of complicated thought -- an RPG or some other game...
But what works best is being alone -- I usually get like that if I've been around people for too long or I'm really tired and stressed out. Either way, being in a crowd of loud, talkative people does not seem to help...