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My first relationship was a really odd one. Met the girl over the internet on the summer of my 8th grade to freshman year. I then started talking to her throughout freshman year and over the next summer I realized I had a crush on her. I told her how I felt and she said she felt the same and like that her and I were boyfriend and girlfriend. Then later I went to disneyland for my birthday and she agreed to meet me and my best friend there. The three of us hung out and chatted. Later on in December we broke up but then next April got back together. Then a year after that we split up for good though now her and I are decent friends though I'm still cautious with her in order to avoid us dating for a third time, since I know it does NOT work.
 

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I got into my first relationship when I was fifteen. It took me about three months before I let him kiss me. Even holding hands was a huge deal. I was only his second girlfriend, and apparently his first didn't stay with him very long. We dated about eight months. Neither of us was willing to have sexual intercourse, because we were both idealistic about it. We just teased each other a lot in sexually stimulating ways. ( I eventually lost my virginity to someone else when I was 21.) He was a few years older than I was, but less mature and less intelligent. I didn't mind that, because he was the first INFP male I had ever met. We were inseparable most of the time. He had emotional problems and would randomly go into these strange withdrawn moods where he seemed angry for no reason but wouldn't talk about it. He said it was because his mother used to beat him when he was a kid. He sometimes put me down, but most likely that was because he didn't know better. He wasn't really bright enough to know that it was hurtful to tell a girl she looked like a piece of shit when she wore bell bottoms. I considered him tactless, but not abusive. Another red flag was that he was afraid of my healthy relationship with my mother. My mom believed he was dangerous because of times when I would be talking to her and he would twist my arm around to try to signal me to stop saying whatever I was saying, but I feel that it was a fear-based behavior rather than intentional violence. He wasn't used to the idea of a child being able to talk freely with a mother, so it made him tense when I failed to address her in a formal way. I was mostly okay with his mood swings except that I did have a few nightmares about marrying him and coming home to a dark little trailer to see him sitting at the kitchen table scowling, and I was terrified of spending my whole life feeling as though I were alone there. I finally broke up with him after he tried to strangle me (randomly without any provocation) with his bare hands at a movie theater in front of one of his friends. Afterward he said he didn't remember anything about it. He blanked out for a while. His friend had to pull him off of me. I became afraid of him and immediately broke up with him over the phone. (My mom wouldn't let me keep dating him after that, and since she was providing our transportation, she was able to decide whether I saw him or not.) He stalked me quietly for years, always showing up to visit me wherever I was living, and we had pleasant, friendly encounters. He did this until I disappeared, but resumed again afterward. We are still on friendly terms. He wants me to move to Alaska to live with him, but despite the way his eyes affect me when he wants to have his way, I know better. He waited until fairly recently to lose his virginity because he had been holding out for me, and only lost hope a few years ago. I believe he is still in love with me.
 
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I had my first relationship when I was 15. I met him online through LiveJournal and we both discovered that we actually lived near each other. He was 18 at the time, a freshman starting college, while I was a freshman in high school. We were in love at one point, we were each other's firsts (sex), and it lasted for nearly 2 years, until I broke it off over reasons that aren't really a big deal... but I'm glad it ended.
 

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I was 18 when I had my first relationship. It lasted for 3 years. He ended up being a pretty terrible person. Or was, and I just chose to ignore it in the beginning. He was emotionally manipulative, very clingy, mistrusting, cheated on me a lot, made fun of me, destroyed things I liked or that he had given me, would break up with me constantly making my confidence pretty much shatter to where I was always depressed and wasn't allowed to see friends. I had almost no social life. I hardly ate. I lost close to 30 lbs in two months. I finally left him and he turned into a vicious stalker. We're at a point now where we can be civil, but I definitely learned from it. I learned what to avoid, how to defend myself better and not take shit from someone just because they're dating you.
man that is more depressing than I thought. Sorry.
 

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My first relationship existed purely for sex. Or at least, that's what I thought it was going to be. She fell in love with me and it felt good to be loved, so I stayed. I ended up having deep feelings for her too, but it wasn't my "ideal" relationship, and I'm nothing if not. So cut to three and a half years later and I'm starting to think my ideal doesn't exist. I'd kept my eyes open, but nothing caught my fancy. Right as I'm about to fully commit, bam! ... Fuck life. Anyway, it got me thinking that I should go my own way. So that's my story. I don't know why I'm telling everyone how much of an asshole I am.
 

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My first relationship hasn't happened yet. My first "crush" was not too long ago and it managed to blind me to the fact that we're not compatible in the first place. I started to notice that shortly before finding out she wasn't interested.

I look at it as a kind of preview. I got a chance to learn from my mistakes while realizing that, had I not made those mistakes, I probably wouldn't be dating her right now anyway. Thus, it was essentially a consequence-free learning experience.
 

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My first (and only) relationship was a LDR that lasted for almost 5 years, with a breakup that was a cross between being abruptly cut off and dragged out over a month. I was 19-24. I learned to to listen to my intuition and NEVER blindly stay in a relationship for flaky reasons when warning signs are all around. I learned to not say "oh well" when I jumped into a relationship and then found out it wasn't really what I'd hoped for. I learned to never put life on hold for something that may never happen. I learned there is some wisdom after all to making a guy pursue you. Among many other things... :bored:
 

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It gets easier with age because people -- both men and women -- generally have a more refined sense of what they want and what other people want. Social interactions of all types tend to become easier as someone matures socially. The idea that people are "old and desperate" at that point is idiotic and actually reflects insecurity on your part. I get the impression that you don't see relationships as being based on personal merits but circumstances. I could speculate as to why, but I'm not sure it would help.
Go for it champ.
 
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