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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
ENFPs,
What do you do when someone pushes you over the edge?
How does it feel?
Do you try to stop it?
What do you say to people when you're pissed?
How do you feel afterwards?

Personally if someone is saying something to me or making fun of me I'll laugh it off at first, try to humor my way out of it, start to get mostly serious and tell them to stop/ ignore them, start to get more and more angry it'll be boiling inside of me, I'll very calmly start to say extremely mean and emotionally degrading things a lot of the times if I know them well enough I'll make my degrading very personal and say the things that I think would destroy them inside, eventually start yelling, and finally murder.. just kidding, usually I'll end up feeling really bad about the things I said and I'll apologize for it. I feel embarrassed when people see me out of control, I also really don't like it when someone has a problem with me because I always feel like it's something I did or didn't do.
 

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Luckily, this happens very rarely!

In everyday quarrels I tend to take the blow just to stop the conflict from escalating, or find a way to joke it off. 90% of everyday shit is not worth becoming angry over, unless someone is very unfair with me.

What do you do when someone pushes you over the edge?
I never get physical. And almost never get into those kinds of situations. But when I do it's all engines on. My whole body starts shaking.

How does it feel?
Like it's the only option to defend myself.

Do you try to stop it?
Not exactly when it happens, but I always feel bad and try to apologize.

What do you say to people when you're pissed?
I usually find the thing about their person they are most insecure about, and magnify it by 1000.

How do you feel afterwards?
I always feel ashamed and guilty when I have hurt someone. Even if they "deserved" it or not.
 

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Firstly, I try to let things slide as much as possible. However, when they personally set out to hurt me and it's crystal clear they delivered some offence or attack of some kind. I give it to them straight, no more maybes or what ifs. They need to know the Absolute Truth. whatever that may be, usually to their expense.

And when I'm really really mad, I tend to pray on peoples weaknesses, and feel really shit about it shortly after. It's like you've done irreversible unforgivable damage and all you have to say is 'whatevs' .


What do you say to people when you're pissed?
I usually find the thing about their person they are most insecure about, and magnify it by 1000.

How do you feel afterwards?
I always feel ashamed and guilty when I have hurt someone. Even if they "deserved" it or not.
glad I'm not the only one. X)
 

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It depends on what the person is pushing me "over the edge" with. My beliefs? My friends, family? Reality?

I had a friend that all of a sudden didn't want me to hug her. Every time I would try talking to her, she'd roll her eyes & not look at me. We are extremely similar; I think she's an ENFP too, but she's very insecure & wanted to be popular & since we are both usually in the spotlight around our friends for starting conversations...

Anyhow, she began talking about me behind my back. I didn't know why & she never told me until another friend told me. I'm too intense when talking to her & she said to her that it made her anxious around me. I cried when I got home & began to overthink everything. I thought it was all my fault.
So I stopped hugging her & I wouldn't talk to her unless she talked with me. She never did. Slowly she wound down to being my acquaintance, but on the outside we were still "friends".

Since I was still friendly to her, she began talking about another friend of ours behind her back. THAT was when the line was drawn. I pretended to agree with what she said, but really, she was blaming her for things in her own personal life. Nothing she said lined up. They were stupid excuses.

I told our friend to take one of her views & not mention it around her so much. Ex-friend was texted by friend with a question & she texted back one hell of an answer. My friend ended up crying.

The next time I met my ex-friend, she said that another one of our friends must of told (crying) friend about it! I acted shocked & agreed with her (muhahaha!).

Sometimes I completely forgive my ex-friend. Others, when I see her again & she says some nonsense, I recall everything she's done. But I've accepted this is the sort of person she is & even when confronted, she has to be right. I know not to trust her for she's lost the privilege of that & being considered a friend. After acceptance, I move on. You can't get along with everyone, period.
 

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"What do you do when someone pushes you over the edge?"

Honestly, I don't think that has happened. It certainly might have since my memory is complete crap, but I really don't remember ever deliberately "verbally attacking" someone, so to say. Once when I was 10 or something my father happened to be the one tipping over the bucket of my emotions, and my reaction was brutal and instantaneous, but he wasn't the reason the bucket was full. :)

If I were to look at MBTI and the Enneagram then it makes sense that I don't lash out on people. I'm a 9 and their main priority is peace, and I'm guessing that ENFPs are one of the most capable types of getting what they want from people, at least when that thing is something as nice as peace. My apathy (of both the good and the bad kind) has helped too, of course...

In recent years I've only gotten pissed a few times, and that's been directed at myself, while I've been alone. Although I did get frustrated at a girl at a bar a few months ago (she disrespected me and herself at the same time) but I didn't say anything offensive, I just raised my voice.

Obviously it's good to get pissed sometimes, but my unconscious clearly doesn't agree. :)
 

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A couple of stages.

Gettin a bit annoyed and laughin at myself first. Then beein a bit more annoyed. Then just like, shutting down, no stares, no words, agressive physical expression (slammin doors or something). If it goes a bit further its basically over and I just get violent, but only toward males.

If you re a girl im just goin away and completely removin you out of my life
 

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What do you do when someone pushes you over the edge?
It takes a lot too actually push me over the edge. I am very easy going person so I brush it off, however, once I'm pushed I will immediately put that person on their ass. (metaphorically mostly ...lol)

How does it feel? All you see is red...then immediately blue because being angry is exhausting

Do you try to stop it? Yes, I like my peace and harmony shit.

What do you say to people when you're pissed? Depends on the situation.

How do you feel afterwards? TIRED. yelling, being angry really takes a toll.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Luckily, this happens very rarely!

In everyday quarrels I tend to take the blow just to stop the conflict from escalating, or find a way to joke it off. 90% of everyday shit is not worth becoming angry over, unless someone is very unfair with me.

What do you do when someone pushes you over the edge?
I never get physical. And almost never get into those kinds of situations. But when I do it's all engines on. My whole body starts shaking.

How does it feel?
Like it's the only option to defend myself.

Do you try to stop it?
Not exactly when it happens, but I always feel bad and try to apologize.

What do you say to people when you're pissed?
I usually find the thing about their person they are most insecure about, and magnify it by 1000.

How do you feel afterwards?
I always feel ashamed and guilty when I have hurt someone. Even if they "deserved" it or not.
Yeah I can relate a lot to this. I almost act the same way and yeah when I'm really mad I shake pretty bad. I'm always in control though, even when I'm immensely pissed I still can act fairly calm cause I'm still calculating everything I say and do to get the result I want.
 
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