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Mainly wanting responses from ESFP types. Both male and female responses:

From experience, which of the 16 types have you been most attracted to/had a crush on?

* What was enjoyable about it?

* How long did it last?

* Why did it end?

* What was the chemistry between the two of you like?

* Were you compatible (easily understood one another/you "got" one another)

* Would you date that same personality type in the future?

Comparably, which of the 16 types turned out to be the worst dates? Were they total disasters? If so, why?
 

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I'm an ESFP and I am most attracted to my Mr who is an ISTP.

I was in a relationship with ENFJ (for 2 years) , ISFJ (I didn't know I was in a relationship with at a stage) & ESTP (3 years).

* What is enjoyable about it?
I get to be myself around him with no judgement. He loves me for who I am. He is the first person I have been comfortable not wearing makeup around. I can talk logical and be silly. We both give to the relationship which is a big difference from the past. He wants to know my family and spend time with them. We both love to do each other interests and comprise is a big thing in our relationship.

* How long have you been together?
I have been in a relationship with him so far for 1 year and 4 months* and we are still in a relationship.

* What was the chemistry between the two of you like?
The chemistry between us is we are lovers and best friends. We get two in one. We are very alert as to what each other is feeling. We look out for each other.

I will speak for myself and say this is the first relationship that I have felt we are both walking hand in hand in this life.

When a shadow is present I just see myself, alone walking and this was the case in former relationships. I was with someone but loneliness and that one shadow of me was present. I don't know if I'm making sense. But when I am with my Mr I see both of us in that shadow when we walk, hand in hand.


* Were you compatible (easily understood one another/you "got" one another)?
If you talking about star signs, I am a Sagittarius (fire sign) and he is a Aquarius (air sign). Air and Fire tend to go well together. Minus the star signs I feel we are compatible. We understand each other and what makes it even more smoother is the fact we are observant and have a want to understand each other, fulfill each other wants etc.

* Would you date that same personality type in the future?
What I like about his mbti - ISTP
Though he is introvert he is very aware of his surrounds. I actually see through his eyes that he not only observing me, but is interested in my likes, what I pick out as a dislike and like, he knows when I change in mood and how to act in sync with all that happens. He uses his senses in the relationship and is always a step ahead in his thoughts & want for us. My Mr is not judgmental he wants to understand and does not jump. He listens and hears, and is able to empathize as well as sympathize with me. He appreciates my difference.

Comparably, which of the 16 types turned out to be the worst dates?
ESTP personally for me.

Were they total disasters? If so, why?
An ESTP who was a Gemini hurt me beyond words and it was disaster. He had a hinder agenda throughout our relationship. it even reached marriage.

He looked me in the face the following day after wedding and said to "I only married you for papers, I do not love you. You are not my type and now that we have done this I don't need you!"

I am a victim of marriage fraud and it hurtttttttttttttttttttttt (my emphasis on the t is it was painful). Long story short I was broken for 6-7 years and did not date anyone. Negative all of this plus I wasted an aspect of my life. Positive is I got to meet my Mr above who showed me love, supports me, has been a pillar in my life, has cuddled me when I have explained this matter and continues to stand by my side today.

**I will say this, not all ESTPs are like this at all. I was not compatiable with the man who did this and not all Gemini's are like this. What may work for someone may not work for the other.**

I have saying, "A positive comes with a negative and a negative comes with a positive".

I always say to those hurt and broken this may be a negative period but when we focus on other aspects of our life there are positives. Even when things are going well there is a negative. We have to choose to focus our energy in the right places and control what each of us puts out.

When I look at this matter, I have learnt to give my thanks because I may not have encountered the love I have now. I give thanks to God and the universe.
 

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@Preciselyd



Interesting, my relationship with my ESFP ex was a complete and utter disaster. I won't talk much about it in this particular section to be tactful but in my case our relationship was toxic beyond belief and I was the one who the ESFP married because she didn't love me but because she wanted the perceived wealth she thought I could generate for her. It went south fast and we were divorced within 3 years of being married.

When a shadow is present I just see myself, alone walking and this was the case in former relationships. I was with someone but loneliness and that one shadow of me was present. I don't know if I'm making sense. But when I am with my Mr I see both of us in that shadow when we walk, hand in hand.
You're making perfect sense to me because my ex used to say exactly the same thing. She told me about a dream she had once and she said that she's holding hands with someone, but she couldn't see his face. Initially she said that she thought it was me, but as our relationship got worse, I could tell that we were both completely lonely even though we shared each other's bed. I got suicidal and she decided it was time to find another mate. I'm very glad that she did move on. I'm sure she's now somewhat happy somewhere else, and I've rebuilt my life anew and I'm also very happy. We've both moved on. No ill will towards each other.

She also used to talk about having this "witch" inside her that she's burying ... But sometimes it would actually come out and we would have some of the worst fights I've ever had in my life with anyone.


Towards the end of our relationship, it started looking like this without the physical abuse. We were this couple for a while.
 

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My ESFP brother is with an ISFP girl, but he used to be interested in an ESTP girl though they were never dating.
 

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From experience, which of the 16 types have you been most attracted to/had a crush on?
Most recently, an INTJ.

* What was enjoyable about it?
The conversations. Talking with an INTJ is an addicting experience and he knows how to draw me in effortlessly. He definitely charges up my Ni and after a good conversation, I am buzzing with energy. I feel like I radiate it back at him and instead of draining him, it charges him up too.

The Se-touching. I love giving him massages... we sink into this peaceful state where we just enjoy touching and being touched. There's this amazing serenity that surrounds us... it's something that I've never experienced before and wonder if I will ever experience it again.

* How long did it last?
We were FWB for a couple of months but have decided to dial things back to just being friends.

* Why did it end?
I developed feelings but he didn't.

* What was the chemistry between the two of you like?
Electric at times... calm and soothing at others. Addictive no matter what.

* Were you compatible (easily understood one another/you "got" one another)
I like to think so... I think we're pretty honest with each other.

* Would you date that same personality type in the future?
I would. INTJs are addictive. My INTJ is my kryptonite.

Comparably, which of the 16 types turned out to be the worst dates? Were they total disasters? If so, why?
Funnily enough, another ESFP. He was so smart but refused to have deep conversations with me. XD
 

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Funnily enough, another ESFP. He was so smart but refused to have deep conversations with me. XD
@ametan Hmm. Interesting. Are you sure you're an ESFP and not an ENFP? The most "ideal" romantic match for an ENFP is an INTJ, which you seemingly had a great relationship with. Also, the fact that you enjoy "deep" conversations is a sign of having strong intuitive tendencies, which you find far more often in ENFPs rather than ESFPs.
 

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@ametan Hmm. Interesting. Are you sure you're an ESFP and not an ENFP? The most "ideal" romantic match for an ENFP is an INTJ, which you seemingly had a great relationship with. Also, the fact that you enjoy "deep" conversations is a sign of having strong intuitive tendencies, which you find far more often in ENFPs rather than ESFPs.
As an INTJ with both ENFP and ESFP friends, I will say the bond with my ESFPs was more magnetic - almost had a "fated" comfortability - and intense ("did we just become best friends?" "yup!") while the ENFP took time to get into but was comfortable like an old married couple.

And since you're new, just a heads up - that's actually a violation of the rules (suggesting someone is a different type if they did not explicitly ask).
 

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Hmm. Interesting. Are you sure you're an ESFP and not an ENFP? The most "ideal" romantic match for an ENFP is an INTJ, which you seemingly had a great relationship with. Also, the fact that you enjoy "deep" conversations is a sign of having strong intuitive tendencies, which you find far more often in ENFPs rather than ESFPs.
Yup, pretty sure I'm an ESFP as my N is pretty terrible... I'm awful at future planning. I make decisions in the moment and have learned to deal with the consequences rather than avoid them.

I think perhaps my use of the word "deep" is the problem. I've seen INTJs and INFJs get into a deep conversation and I definitely couldn't probe things to the same depths. My "deep" is probably continental shelf deep whereas I feel like N-types are Mariana Trench deep. :laughin:

As an INTJ with both ENFP and ESFP friends, I will say the bond with my ESFPs was more magnetic - almost had a "fated" comfortability - and intense ("did we just become best friends?" "yup!")
Yes. This. I'm a firm believer in socionics duality because of this.

And just because it's cute: :fall:
 

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I'm definitely attracted to ISTJs. A girl who doesn't know how to have fun needs a fun boyfriend.

INTPs are my favorite friends but they don't form close bonds do they.

I think I could date an ESTJ but ESTJ females are quite rare I think. They are the kind that like to argue and are cute when they do it.

ISFPs and ISTPs can be ok friends but just don't do anything for me

INFPs are too sensitive and emotionally volatile

INFJs are easily offended and low energy

ENFJ and ESFJs are usually bossy, fake bitches

ENFPs are too bizarre

INTJ, ENTJ you kidding man?

ISFJ = mushy

ESTP never met a female one

ENTPs = arrogant psycho-bitches
 

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Well, ive only ever dated one guy. He was an ENFP, it was terrible. Not that I think it had anything to do with his type, but he was certifiable insane so it was a nightmare. I dont ever want to get back into a relationship, plus I have a very veryyyy low sex drive, so i dont usually do the whole fwb thing.

But in terms of what types im attracted to romantically, it would be ISFP. Probably the only guys i would get into a relationships with are all ISFPs, lol.

* What was enjoyable about it?

Not in a relationship with this ISFP, but we like each other a lot. We share sooo many same morals and values. I never have to explain myself, my actions or the way i feel with him cuz he just seems to naturally understand them. And its rare for people to get me like that. We share the same opinions on almost everything and we dont judge each other too harshly. Hes 28 and im 19, and hes not rushing me to get my life in order, which is rare for a friend that age. Haha. Hes very chilled and we honestly can just talk shit for hours and enjoy each others company.

* What was the chemistry between the two of you like?

Brilliant. We naturally get each other, agree on almost everything, see almost everything in the same light.

* Were you compatible (easily understood one another/you "got" one another)

10000%, been a while since ive met someone that gets me this well

* Would you date that same personality type in the future?
Probably the only personality type id be serious on dating as of now.

Sorry i know my answer isnt the most relevant, but i hope its helpfull in some way ;)
 
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As an INTJ - I frickin love you guys. Come find us please. My best relationships were with ESFPs lol.
 

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I'm an ESFP and I am most attracted to my Mr who is an ISTP.

I was in a relationship with ENFJ (for 2 years) , ISFJ (I didn't know I was in a relationship with at a stage) & ESTP (3 years).

* What is enjoyable about it?
I get to be myself around him with no judgement. He loves me for who I am. He is the first person I have been comfortable not wearing makeup around. I can talk logical and be silly. We both give to the relationship which is a big difference from the past. He wants to know my family and spend time with them. We both love to do each other interests and comprise is a big thing in our relationship.

* How long have you been together?
I have been in a relationship with him so far for 1 year and 4 months* and we are still in a relationship.

* What was the chemistry between the two of you like?
The chemistry between us is we are lovers and best friends. We get two in one. We are very alert as to what each other is feeling. We look out for each other.

I will speak for myself and say this is the first relationship that I have felt we are both walking hand in hand in this life.

When a shadow is present I just see myself, alone walking and this was the case in former relationships. I was with someone but loneliness and that one shadow of me was present. I don't know if I'm making sense. But when I am with my Mr I see both of us in that shadow when we walk, hand in hand.


* Were you compatible (easily understood one another/you "got" one another)?
If you talking about star signs, I am a Sagittarius (fire sign) and he is a Aquarius (air sign). Air and Fire tend to go well together. Minus the star signs I feel we are compatible. We understand each other and what makes it even more smoother is the fact we are observant and have a want to understand each other, fulfill each other wants etc.

* Would you date that same personality type in the future?
What I like about his mbti - ISTP
Though he is introvert he is very aware of his surrounds. I actually see through his eyes that he not only observing me, but is interested in my likes, what I pick out as a dislike and like, he knows when I change in mood and how to act in sync with all that happens. He uses his senses in the relationship and is always a step ahead in his thoughts & want for us. My Mr is not judgmental he wants to understand and does not jump. He listens and hears, and is able to empathize as well as sympathize with me. He appreciates my difference.
literally described my relationship with my ESFP. We both enjoy each other's nonjudgementality. She gives me her unwavering love and affection and loyalty, and I give her my praises and compliments and support. It works out
 
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