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Most hated parental type?

  • ESTP

    Votes: 2 3.2%
  • ESFP

    Votes: 5 8.1%
  • ISTJ

    Votes: 9 14.5%
  • ISFJ

    Votes: 3 4.8%
  • ENTP

    Votes: 1 1.6%
  • ENFP

    Votes: 1 1.6%
  • INTJ

    Votes: 1 1.6%
  • INFJ

    Votes: 1 1.6%
  • ESTJ

    Votes: 24 38.7%
  • ENTJ

    Votes: 5 8.1%
  • ISTP

    Votes: 3 4.8%
  • INTP

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • ESFJ

    Votes: 5 8.1%
  • ENFJ

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • ISFP

    Votes: 1 1.6%
  • INFP

    Votes: 1 1.6%
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
If you have 1 or 2 parents you hated, what type were they and why?

I had an ISTJ father who was a giant a*hole. He had low self esteem and badmouthed lots of people to
try to feel like he was better than them. He severely criticized, insulted, demeaned, and disrespected me.
He never said one good word about me. He terrorized me and made my life hell. He only had gone to elementary school and worked in a factory. He was always looking for any excuse to badmouth me and scream at me. He complained about me not respecting him, which was crazy because he's the one who disrespected me. One day I finally punched his face 3 times and knocked his ass the f* out.

My mother was an ESTJ. She disapproved of toys and wouldn't buy me any. She only believed in school and work. She didn't care about or recognize my feelings. She acted like my feelings didn't exist and my happiness didn't matter. She didn't go to my band & orchestra concerts except for the 1st one. She didn't go to my junior high graduation. She thought her job was more important. Virtually everyone else's parents went to these things. I didn't get nurtured at all.

I hate both of them. Pretty much nothing but hate. Cold hearted, mean, unsupportive, stupid bastards.
 

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That's a useless question.
a) Each type differs when it comes to values
b) Individuals within each type differ in values
c) Many people haven't developed fully even as adults, and will show immature behavior in some or many areas of their lives. This behavior is, in a way, type related, but it's not what you'd generally expect from a person of a given type.
d) It's silly to diss an entire type based on the behavior of one individual. Based on your post, I could say that all INTJs must be whiners, and you'd likely call all ISTPs assholes after reading this reply.

So vent if you want to vent, but please skip the typist crap.
 

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^ Nah, this is totally a legit question. Just keep the whole thread under control. No need to immediately accuse him or this thread of being typist. It's typist if you make it typist. Let's see where this thread goes and which options people actually pick.

My ISTJ friend told me (while drunk) that he hated his ISTP father so much to the point where he absolutely destroyed his father's fortune in the stock market, resulting in the loss of thousands of $$$.
 

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I think it probably depends on the types of the parents and the children, and also individual factors. I don't think any one type is the worst parent. A child may not be suited to their parents' parenting style, resulting in poor development and psychological/emotional problems. In that case, tough luck you were born from those parents, deal with it. But also, not all ESTJ parents disapprove of toys. There are probably ESTJ people out there who adore buying toys for their kids. And not all ISTJ parents badmouth people or have had only elementary education.

Don't hate on certain types because of personal experience. One needs to differentiate between what is type, and what is someone's own trait. You can't group everyone of the same type into one kind of person. That's not really how MBTI works, or any other psychological model. I would believe that if two people of the same type were subject to the exact same environment throughout their lives, that they would end up being very similar people. But that's not the case. What defines a person has a lot to do with nuture, not just nature.

For me, I have an ISTP father and an ISFP mother. I'm not close with my father, though we do share a lot of personality similarities (hello, Ti). I don't really get my mother's way of perceiving the world. My grandmother's an ISFJ and we certainly don't understand each other or get along well, though she loves me more than anything in the world. Grandpa's an IxTJ, I'm tempted to say INTJ, and we're... eh. Okay. He's stubborn, but he's been through a lot. I also have friends of the same types. My boyfriend's an ISTP and he's wonderful, I have an ISFP and INTJ friend that I'm good with. So it's not just type. Generational and cultural differences make a huge impact on a person's personality.
 

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^ Nah, this is totally a legit question. Just keep the whole thread under control. No need to immediately accuse him or this thread of being typist. It's typist if you make it typist. Let's see where this thread goes and which options people actually pick.
Sorry if I came off as trying to make him shut up by calling his post typist, that wasn't my intention. @GENIUSandVIOLENCE wrote pretty much what I meant with a bit more finesse and eloquence.
 

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(while wondering if these strong family experiences are the main factor for forming our type).
It certainly is important in the formation of a personality, but I don't think it's relevant to actual type: My parents are INTJ+INFP, and we "kids" are INTP, ISTP, ISFP and ISTJ respectively, so there's really no common denominator for our types. But our expressions of our respective types is definitely shaped by our experiences growing up, in combination with the tendencies each of us has when it comes to how we deal with positive and negative experiences.
 

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had low self esteem and badmouthed lots of people to
try to feel like he was better than them. He severely criticized, insulted, demeaned, and disrespected me.
He never said one good word about me. He terrorized me and made my life hell. He only had gone to elementary school and worked in a factory. He was always looking for any excuse to badmouth me and scream at me. He complained about me not respecting him, which was crazy because he's the one who disrespected me.
That's my ESFP mother (the one I voted for). Such a horrible person and parent.

I'm not a fan of my father either (ISFJ) but at least he's not psycho.
 
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The worst personality types for parents are unhealthy types. These are the types who are insecure and who try to live vicariously through their kids. When the kids rebel, mainly because they want to live their own lives in their own way, the parents get furious because the kids are not as moldable as they believed. It doesn't make for very healthy family relationships.
My uncle was a good example of that. He was a control freak, even when he was young. He and my mom's sister had three children, two sons and a daughter. His second son could do no wrong. His first son could do no right. Eventually, he kicked his older son out of the house, and the son traveled far away. The two were estranged for many years. Eventually, they spoke to one another again. But the unhealthy personality of the father and the fact that he was (unsuccessfully) trying to control his son basically destroyed their relationship.
edit: Quite honestly, I never liked my uncle very much. I saw him and mean and judgmental and not very friendly. Yep, there was a personality clash. Fortunately, he was not my dad.
 

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Any of them.
l think hating your parents is one of the easiest things in the world to do, and l also think type is somewhat influenced by environment so quite often the kid will develop to be opposite in at least one way and in turn justify the for that reason.

ESTJ may seem like the easiest to hate, but an SJ child might also feel abused and misunderstood by an INFP parent.

Here is the chain of hate-related development in my maternal family:

SJ grandparent>INFP mother>ENTP child(self)<>ISFP sibling.

The dynamic seemed to unfold predictably as far as what l've been alive to observe.
Mother thinks grandmother is rigid and controlling, l thought my mother was irrational and the ISFP most likely thinks we're both insane and her S/N preference seemed to develop pretty late.
 

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Gotta love the disparity in this forum. Of course you will see most of the poll results = some kind of sensor, b/c intuitives dominate the forum.
 

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If you have 1 or 2 parents you hated, what type were they and why?

I had an ISTJ father who was a giant a*hole. He had low self esteem and badmouthed lots of people to
try to feel like he was better than them. He severely criticized, insulted, demeaned, and disrespected me.
He never said one good word about me. He terrorized me and made my life hell. He only had gone to elementary school and worked in a factory. He was always looking for any excuse to badmouth me and scream at me. He complained about me not respecting him, which was crazy because he's the one who disrespected me. One day I finally punched his face 3 times and knocked his ass the f* out.

My mother was an ESTJ. She disapproved of toys and wouldn't buy me any. She only believed in school and work. She didn't care about or recognize my feelings. She acted like my feelings didn't exist and my happiness didn't matter. She didn't go to my band & orchestra concerts except for the 1st one. She didn't go to my junior high graduation. She thought her job was more important. Virtually everyone else's parents went to these things. I didn't get nurtured at all.

I hate both of them. Pretty much nothing but hate. Cold hearted, mean, unsupportive, stupid bastards.
My parents were great for the most part. Sometimes they really sucked. Some of the things you've listed, my parents did and I didn't see as 'bad' though. They didn't go to school performances or parent teacher conferences etc... That didn't bother me. I got upset with them when they moved without me, most moves I made with them. A few I had to stay with my Grandparents. I felt like excess luggage when they did that. I felt like the only kid that didn't see their parents for months. But then when I saw them again, I was just so happy to see them and couldn't remember why I was upset with them.
 

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Sure we're not exactly the most loved but let's be honest, SJ's are natural born parents. We're "hated parents" because we do what needs to be done, regardless of what the kid might think. The kids are usually thankful later on when their college is paid for using the college fund created by said "hated parents".
 

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I voted for my type because I'm convinced that I am going to be the meanest, most strict parent of all time. It is going to be so much fun.

However, I totally get the ESTJ vote. From what I've heard they seem big on traditions and receiving unquestioned respect, which would drive me positively crazy.
 

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I was expecting tons of votes for my type. I'm surprised so far there aren't any. I lack structure, I'm told I spoil my kids and I try to be sensitive but it's not my strong suite. I'm waiting for the day they demand I pay for their therapy.
 

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My dad is an INTP and and my mom is an ENFJ. I don't hate either of them. I don't typically like being around them, but that doesn't mean I don't love them, nor does it mean I don't appreciate everything they've done for me. I'd like to also add how it's such bullshit that the sensors are getting hammered in this thread. Just because you don't like your parents, and can't always relate to them, doesn't mean they're bad parents. They're not supposed to be your friends. They're supposed to be the people that push you, so that you can at least stand on your own, two feet.
 

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Stepdad's an ESTJ, mom's an ISFP. They both have their flaws and are extremely overprotective. My stepdad is either a narcissist or extremely moody, while my mom is racist and just follows my stepdad's opinions. I can't say I hate them, although I'd like them to stop controlling my life and let me try to be independent for once. I swear, if I hear that "I just want what's best for you" again, I'll explode.

I voted ESTJ, even though I know it depends on the person.
 
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