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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Greetings to a multitude of wonderful posters. I have lurked and lurked and lurked among you and your glorious wisdom for a little over a year now, more or less obsessively, trying to find my Enneagram type. I adore Enneagram. It has shaped my conception of the world, clarified it, and brought others' perspectives into new focus and possibility for understanding.

My MBTI type, as it has been easier to figure out (or at least near constantly reported in every test online for at least the past six years) is INFP. I read once that INFP is the type of the "undecided". Goddamn it was that moniker a true one, for me at least. Though, of course, in my undecidedness, I have considered INTP second-most frequently, and ENFP third-most frequently. I adore the ENFP figures Joseph Campbell, Kurt Vonnegut, and Rajneesh, despite the acknowledgement that he is a deceptive little devil. The INFP people I adore and relate to are far more numerous: Bjork, the language of Shakespeare, Robert Smith of the Cure, and perhaps most (for his idea of giving up his chiefly beloved person for God) Danish philosopher Soren Kierkegaard. I feel slightly ashamed and unoriginal for my relatively recent relation to Kierkegaard, since I have a friend (which I have struggled to type both MBTI-wise and Enneagramically) who is a Kierkegaard fanatic. Kierkegaard seems to be such a greater influence on me than him (and his relationship to me is quite "frenemy"-esque; a silent rivalry), so why is he so enamored by someone I find to be so disgustingly like me? (By the way, I don't know if I necessarily enjoy reading Kierkegaard; it seems like reading my old high school journals and saying "God, I know. I know already. Stop.")

When it comes to Enneagram, I am lost. Not being able to discern my Enneagram type is like looking at a group of nine couples and not knowing which ones are my parents. It's frustrating. I am aware that frustration is a marker of the Enneagram 4 type. I am also aware that such self-involved, self-obsessed post such as this one have a tendency of seeming 4ish. Thus, Enneagram 4 is in constant consideration for my ego fix.

But I'm so lazy. 25, I live with my parents, and I have no job besides tutoring ESL, which is hardly a career. I've never though of a career seriously. I'd much rather sit at home and eat cheese. So 9ish. It's so very self-narcotization.

Why am I sitting at home and eating cheese rather than advancing myself in any real sense? Largely, although I would never admit it to anyone in my real life, I am so lost in reminiscing about my ex-girlfriend of three years, who I lived with for that entire time (after falling in love, so quickly, so Romeo & Juliet-style) (she is a self-proclaimed 4w3 ENFP who I still adore, so much more now that I am not with her, but rather sustaining a peaceful friendship with her, seeing her in person approximately once a week). That is my real full-time job. Apart from sleep. And apart from obsessively gathering information about personality types, both for my own self-understanding and the understanding of others. And again, I thank all you wonderful people for building up such a grand database of personality information here.

So I admit that my two most frequent self-types are 4 and 9. But I gather information like a 5, test as a 5 (5w4) nearly every time, mistrust the tests because I want to build up my own informational system like a 5, and only sign up after more than an entire obsessive (entranced 5?) year of reading this forum, and other forums, as an observer (5?) and having a few beers (5-ish fear temporarily dissolved?) to post here.

The most important part is that I would like assistance in typing myself. I've done all I can do, and I spin between not only 4, 5, 9 (those are simply the most frequent), but 1, 2, 3, 6, and 7 as well. The only one that never seems to suit me is 8.

So what does everyone think?
Feel free to ask questions! And remember I'm an INFP so criticism and conflict makes me cry like a bitch! But don't hold back truth, regardless.
 

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Discussion Starter · #2 ·
I found the typing form, and I will fill it out here:

1) What aspect of your personality made you unsure of your type?
Constant retyping of self. When I type myself, I am DEAD SURE that that's me. I have typed myself as 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, and 9.

2) What do you yearn for in life? Why?
I yearn to avoid conflict. I'm aware this is a 9 thing, but it's also an INFP thing. And I don't fully understand how non-9 INFPs handle conflict. Sometimes I love conflict. It's good for stories. I want to be a writer when I grow up.

3) Think about a time where you felt like you were at your finest. Tell us what made you feel that way.
I am at my finest when I'm alone.

4) What makes you feel inferior?
Any skill, quality, or anything in another that I wish I had that I don't. Feeling like there's something wrong with me that others have that I'm missing.

5) What tends to weigh on your decisions? (Do you think about people, pro-cons, how you feel about it, etc.)
I think about if people will still smile at me and be kind to me or not after I do them. Most importantly, my parents, close friends, and romantic interests.

6) When working on a project what is normally your emphasis? Do you like to have control of the outcome?
I like to have complete artistic control. If I cannot, I wish to be told what to do, so I can do that, and then later escape to my own world where I can do my own thing.

7) Describe us a time where you had a lot of fun. How is your memory of it?
I'm having a lot of fun right now. Considering ideas and posting here.

8) When you want to learn something new, what feels more natural for you? (Are you more prone to be hands on, to theorize, to memorize, etc)
I theorize a lot, but I also like to gather as much information as I can that seems relevant. Without a real world component or something to attach to, the ideas cannot further themselves.

9) How organized do you to think of yourself as?
Moderately. I hoard to an extent, but getting rid of clutter excites me, so I do that too.

10) How do you judge new ideas? You try to understand the principles behind it to see if they make sense or do you look for information that supports it?
I try to understand the person who owns the idea. I usually quickly recognize that their perspective is valid, and try to understand it from there. I compartmentalize things I hear from people, since if I listen to them all together without organization, my mind becomes nonsensical. In that moment, it's about understanding of the other and synchronizing our perspectives for that moment. Why I really like the ideas, though, is that they add to my personal database, which is ever-expanding.

11) You find harmony by making sure everyone is doing fine and belonging to a given group or by making sure that you follow what you believe and being yourself?
The latter.

12) Are you the kind that thinks before speaking or do you speak before thinking? Do you prefer one-on-one communication or group discussions?
Think before speaking. Sometimes only thinking, no speaking, if not asked what I am thinking.

13) Do you jump into action right away or do you like to know where are you jumping before leaping? Does action speaks more than words?
I like to know, but if I have a good intuition, I jump. Words are the only things that speak to me. Actions without words are useless.

14) It's Saturday. You're at home, and your favorite show is about to start. Your friends call you for a night out. What will you do?
Not actually say no, but put it in the maybe-state. If they're more aggressive, I'll go with them. I like both my shows and my friends, and if I've had enough time alone already, then I'm down for anything.

15) How do you act when you're stressed out?
I cry, if alone. I get mad sometimes too, but never at others.

16) What makes you dislike the personalities of some people?
People who are not flexible bother me. People who do not ask me how I feel but talk my ear off about their issues anyway bother me.

17) Is there anything you really like talking about with other people?
Gathering their perspective for integration into a larger database (usually later on). Some people cheer me up and give me outstanding insight. Some people bring me to peace.

18) What kind of things do pay the least attention to in your life
The news, a lot of trends unless they are very specific to my interests, money to an extent

19) How do your friends perceive you? What is wrong about their perception? ? What would your friends never say about your personality ?
My friends don't know too much about me because they don't ask.

20) You got a whole day to do whatever you like. What kind of activities do you feel like doing?
Sleeping, making music, writing, masturbating, eating, thinking, studying MBTI and Enneagram, the occult, etc.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
That's usually what I think of myself as, triple withdrawn. It's so hard to find the core type between 4 and 9 though. I think this is a common issue.
 

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I see 9. too emotionally flat to be a 4, although you might be depressed. but if you were depressed, you'd be anxious 6ish.

>>I yearn to avoid conflict.

my daughter is infp, not a 9. she'll do conflict to get her way. hell, ANY infp will do conflict to get their way if need be.
 
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