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Who am I? Enneagram and Instinct questionaire.

652 Views 3 Replies 3 Participants Last post by  skyboy
Written from the person who I am without all the speculative bullshittery clouding my vision.(y)

1. What drives you in life? What do you look for?

Happiness in every place. I want to feel content and have my favourite things around me. If there is air con, food and my favourtie drink and tv show/video game, I'm good to go. But I also am dissatisfied with that, I try to extract as much entertainment out of something and are feeling less and less satisfied with small comforts. The hole is getting bigger as expectationd for adulthood have become a reality.

2. What do you hope to accomplish in your life?

Peace and Comfort above all else.

3. What do you hope to avoid doing or being? What values are important to you?

I don't want people attatched to me because I don't want them to not like me underneath the faces I wear. But I simultaneously know that I can be fake then act out and taste freedom, but them I lose my relationships because people didn't know I was this prickly and uncomfrtable to be around.

4. What are your biggest fears (not including phobias)? Why?

I don't have alot of fear and I can't really pinpoint it. I am aware of my fear as a feeling, but I'm not focusing on it at all. Fear is not an emotion I really feel to strongly, I have usually thought my way out of fear before I actually start worrying about things.

5. How do you want others to see you? How do you see yourself?

People think I am a quiet, unassuming guy. But I am dissatisfied because I am more than that an I get agitated when people don't see the me beneath the mask. This is why I like when people know me well and still like me. I'm basically george costanza at my core as a human. Very irritable and bombastic, but I hide it behind a quiet guy.

6. What makes you feel your best? What makes you feel your worst?

I love the moments of peace where I'm in a chair and have all the desireables around me. I have my favourite drink, favourite food it's a cold days and it's overcast. It's chilly so I get into a blanket and sit in a warm place. My cat jumps up on my lap and I sit and play my games. You know it's fun when you look out the window 1 second and it's day, then look again and it's like 7 o'clock.

7. Describe how you experience each of: a) anger; b) shame; c) anxiety.

Anger is territorial and I will get murderous when people try to take things from me. " it's all I have so if you take it from me I will punch you" I also have a frustration with people who use double talk to insult people. That makes me want to rip their balls off! Because they take the high ground if you yell and get angry, they win. That makes my blood boil too. lol.

Shame is lacking in me I think. I'm ashamed of acting in a strange way or being too different from other people. My family giving me those reactions is especially painful. I am more focused on this nowadays because I am outside more often and hate it.

Anxiety comes in when I focus on the future, which seems to be more and more often these days. I'm afraid I'll never be satisfied, I won't find peace, I won't be happy. These things take prescedent above all social or intimate relations.

8. Describe how you respond to each of: a) stress; b) unexpected change; c) conflict.

Stress is bad for me. I feel it down to the bone so I eat too much and like staying inside away from others. I like people, but when I'm around others I know that I need to stress about something. So it makes me want to hide away in place of no obligation/stress with my creature comforts.

I hate unexpected change. Tell me what happening so I can deal with it. If you lay it on me I can't deal with all that change. I need and want communication before something happens, I don't really care what's happening, I just want to know. When my mum was dropping me off at kindergarden she would tell me she was picking me up at 3 and I was fine. Didn't cry or moan, I knew the time and I trusted her, so all was good.

I don't like conflict. It's fun to poke and tease people and vice versa. But when someone wants to genuinely fight me or attack me I definetely try to settle it. Keep it cool like a cucumber, it's all just fun.

9. Describe your orientation to: a) authority; b) power. How do you respond to these?

I don't really care about authority. Stay out of my business and I won't bother you.

I don't care about power, as long as the boat aint sinking I aint looking. I have funner things to attend to, or maybe I don't lol.

10. What is your overall outlook on life and humanity?

I want to have alot of fun and try alot of new things before I kick the bucket. I like people and hate them. They're weird and scary but interesting. Am I wouldn't have anyone to talk to about shit if everyone was gone. Life is pretty cool, I think I have a destiny that is separated from religion. More of a universal super destination.

Thanks if you read through. 😍
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Thanks man!

Yea the 6 is envisioning a negative experience in the future. Doesn't have to be exact, it can just be a feeling of impending negativity. Usually related to a negative intense moment. Eye contact is intense for me, there can be some much love and so much judgement there too. But I'm starting to not give a shit anymore and just express everywhere.

The 9 in me is the merging and calmness. Desire for smoothness and peace. The find a purpose to this life and a desire to have the most perspective on things.
This reads 9 to me, from the desire to maintain contented inertia to the image shifting to the hint of "universal" thinking at the end. 6 is definitely visible as well.
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