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Discussion Starter #1
This was an emotionally charged discussion from both sides, each with its own reasoning and feelings.
That said what judging functions do A or B seem to be using? Who is Ti/Fe or Fi/Te or are they using the same functions?

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A: I?ve been Jane Smith all my life and can think of no reason to change my surname just because I?m married.

B: It?s a normal and expected thing to do. You?ve decided to keep your surname out of vanity.

A: Yes, I admit that it is vanity but only if you admit that it is vain for men to want to pass their surnames to their wives and children.

B: It?s not vain because it?s normal. You see, parts of society will judge a man whose wife insists on keeping her own surname. They will judge him for being ?less than a man?.

A: It?s normalised vanity. Let?s ignore how ingrained in society it is and get to the very base of it. Why do you think it was decided that a woman should take her husband?s surname? At least admit it was for vain reasons.

B: It might have started off for vain reasons but now it?s just normal. You?re rebelling by not changing your name. It?s like you?re trying to be macho or something.

A: I?m sorry that you see wanting to keep one?s surname as a ?macho? male desire. It?s a human thing to want your name to go on or to even take pride of it. Why is it OK for you to keep your surname and have your wife take it and for that not be seen as pride, but when I simply want to keep mine, it?s an act of rebellion?

B: Because it?s how society does it. You ARE rebelling and people will judge you for it. I don?t mind if you want to keep your surname, but I?d be lying if I said I wouldn?t feel good if you took mine. I don?t feel strongly enough for it to be a dealbreaker. I have my own opinions and it won?t be changed. It?s just how society works.
 

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In my opinion they are both using Fe/Ti, but I can see Fi for the one arguing to keep her name. It depends on her real reasons for wanting to keep her name - is it really just that she can't be bothered and sees no logical reason? If so, that's definitely Ti. If it actually has something to do with keeping her individuality then it would be more Fi.
 

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A: I?ve been Jane Smith all my life and can think of no reason to change my surname just because I?m married.
That's a slight hint towards thinking and introversion.

It?s a human thing to want your name to go on or to even take pride of it. Why is it OK for you to keep your surname and have your wife take it and for that not be seen as pride, but when I simply want to keep mine, it?s an act of rebellion?
But then on the other hand, it's actually values that are dominant in the decision.

B appears to be extroverted because they're constantly directing the conversation away from themself. A is constantly personalising everything, so introversion seems likely. But then again this is just a small extract from their lives and may not be typical of them. Apart from that, there just isn't much to say on this topic.
 

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Both Fe/Ti. I thought B might be Fi/Te, but then I read their last statement. A uses the context that B sets to establish her point and evolves her stance, which is very Fe/Ti despite the values aspect. Then again some Fi users are principled but support moralistically flawed values.
 

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Discussion Starter #5 (Edited)
Thanks for the replies, everyone.

Sorry about the apostrophes replaced by question marks, guys. I copied and pasted the conversation from another document on my phone...

In my opinion they are both using Fe/Ti, but I can see Fi for the one arguing to keep her name. It depends on her real reasons for wanting to keep her name - is it really just that she can't be bothered and sees no logical reason? If so, that's definitely Ti. If it actually has something to do with keeping her individuality then it would be more Fi.
What if it's a combination of the two? A's main reason for disliking the whole idea is because she thinks it's sexist. She agrees with B that for a family to share a surname WOULD seem 'neater', but this is just a minor inconvenience if it ever becomes one. And even so, why the man's surname? Why not the woman's? That's her main gripe...that B is not admitting the prejudice in this.
'A' doesn't want to change her surname because she says she's still the same person after marriage so why the sudden change of identity expected of her? There IS some pride in her surname and family too.

B said she'd change her surname without hesitation because that's how things have always been done (then A asks "But WHY was it done that way in the first place?")...and so B says she'd be happy to do it for her new family.

B appears to be extroverted because they're constantly directing the conversation away from themself. A is constantly personalising everything, so introversion seems likely. But then again this is just a small extract from their lives and may not be typical of them. Apart from that, there just isn't much to say on this topic.
Interesting. Perhaps B does have an extroverted dominant function. I will look into that.


Both Fe/Ti. I thought B might be Fi/Te, but then I read their last statement. A uses the context that B sets to establish her point and evolves her stance, which is very Fe/Ti despite the values aspect. Then again some Fi users are principled but support moralistically flawed values.
Yeah, that's what makes Ti/Fi tricky for me. Introverted reasoning is very personal. How does one tell it apart from the personal opinions of Fi? Personally, I think it's based on how much reason they use.

Would you agree that Fi is more likely to say "Because it feels right and that's how things work."
Whereas Ti would be able to explain their views in detail (and enjoy doing so) and have logical reasons for everything (even if based on something value-based like justice/fairness)?

Hope I'm making sense.
 
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