[stick]

and callous and obsessed with posturing and determined to make themselves look better by making other people look worse?

why is flippant, dismissive humor the go-to dialect for nearly everyone?

and why am i so damn sensitive about it?

 

[Wanderling]

I don't know, I wish I had the answer! Especially when there's absolutely no reason to be nasty...

"Man is a wolf to man", I suppose...

 

[Lad]

It's generally how our society seems to work. All of us are competing against one another for various assets such as money, prestige and so on. If anything, it's almost expected based on those "goals."

It's almost comical how different things can be in a place like Japan. I've heard over there that accomplishments reflect on a family as a whole. Also, when you refer to someone you refer to their family name first (unless you know them very well). Over there, so many people seem genuinely happy and supportive of one another.

 

[FiNe SiTe]

It's generally how our society seems to work. All of us are competing against one another for various assets such as money, prestige and so on. If anything, it's almost expected based on those "goals."

It's almost comical how different things can be in a place like Japan. I've heard over there that accomplishments reflect on a family as a whole. Also, when you refer to someone you refer to their family name first (unless you know them very well). Over there, so many people seem genuinely happy and supportive of one another.

Yea, I've heard that it's very friendly and peaceful over in japan.
There's hardly any rubbish around and even the locals stop to help the tourists if they see them lost.
Also it's nice and quiet, even in the city!

A perfect place for INFP's. :wink:

 

[virtualvortexrider]

What's the downside of Japan then? There has got to be a catch?

 

[virtualvortexrider]

Mean is exactly the right word. It has a lot of meangings in the dictionary. One of them is the average.
In German the word used is translated into English as common.
The opposite is polite. The German word for it translates to something like act like royalty. I.e. have manners.

So mean people have no manners because nobody forces them to be polite.

Being sensitive to it can be changed to a certain extend by just ignoring it. The better approach would be to fight back. I was surprised of how nice people can become once I showed that I was no push over. However for an INFP to not be a push over requires quite a bit of energy. I'd say it's worth it though.

Just noticed you are an ENFP. But I'd say the same applies. Maybe minus the energy investment since you are extroverted already.

 

[Bote]

What's the downside of Japan then? There has got to be a catch?

12-15h work day - INFP mass suicide lol. :tongue:

 

[Calvaire]

I have to have Hope that if i'm nice/sweet enough the vibe will rub off on others.

To be honest though people that are rude to everyone and do things on purpose
to make others sad/angry are NOT the ones people most want to be near.

 

[virtualvortexrider]

I have to have Hope that if i'm nice/sweet enough the vibe will rub off on others.

To be honest though people that are rude to everyone and do things on purpose
to make others sad/angry are NOT the ones people most want to be near.

beautiful thought

 

[Zelemont]

I have to have Hope that if i'm nice/sweet enough the vibe will rub off on others.

To be honest though people that are rude to everyone and do things on purpose
to make others sad/angry are NOT the ones people most want to be near.

I definitely agree. I actually feel a bit sorry for the kind of person stick described, because somebody who is mean, callous, and cuts others down to boost him/herself up is trying to cover up some SERIOUS insecurity and in the process they are only making themselves look bad and pushing others away. At least that is how i try to look at it :wink: but it is hard not to feel discouraged sometimes.

I've become much more optimistic over the past few years regarding people. Not everyone is mean. Stick to the nice ones as much as possible, but also remember that mean people were probably raised wrong and have some serious insecurities that they most likely lack the capacity to identify. In other words, meanness=tiny penis.

 

[connieculkins]

That's why religion exists, to keep these average people in line and breed it out of them eventually. I don't know if it's working all that well. Around here the jerkiest people are also the churchgoers.

 

[Euphoric Nocturne]

I have to have Hope that if i'm nice/sweet enough the vibe will rub off on others.

I think I was actually able to pull this off before. There have been multiple instances when acquaintances and classmates of mine are much more polite and respectful when they're around me compared to how I see them at a distance when they're usually more rude and disrespectful. It's a shame it stops working when I'm not around. :frustrating:

 

[virtualvortexrider]

yeah remote mind control would be helpful here

otherwise yeah otherwise it echoes out of the woods what you shouted in before

 

[j3321]

I'm pretty mean but that's only because I treat people the way I would want to be treated. Leave it to an INTP to have the Golden Rule backfire on you.

 

[Sily]

I don't think negativity and being mean & rude are things INFPs really like to be around. Maybe there are a few types that blossom & thrive under those things (it's like fertilizer for them and they grow into a huge strong fields of poison ivy) but I don't think INFPs is one of them.

 

[cappuccinocool]

This world is competitive--insensitivity comes with the territory.

 

[mondster]

I don't think negativity and being mean & rude are things INFPs really like to be around. Maybe there are a few types that blossom & thrive under those things (it's like fertilizer for them and they grow into a huge strong fields of poison ivy) but I don't think INFPs is one of them.

I absolutely agree. I try to cut off myself from such people but sometimes circumstances call for me to work or to be with them. In those situations I just try to be as warm and positive as possible and hope that they'll eventually be influenced a little by me.

 

[Isis]

and callous and obsessed with posturing and determined to make themselves look better by making other people look worse?

Overly-developed thinking joined with personal insecurity

why is flippant, dismissive humor the go-to dialect for nearly everyone?

we feel threatened by things that are different from us and rely on humor to diffuse the discomfort

and why am i so damn sensitive about it?

because you're undoubtedly nicer than other of us and would not act that way...

 

[Riy]

They are Miserable, When they are miserable they need to make someone else even more Miserable then they are.

 

[Blackbird]

What's the downside of Japan then? There has got to be a catch?

A whole different flavor of sexism. I would not want to ever live there, no thank you.