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Closest to understanding may be the other dominant Ni user. But let's be honest: auxiliary Fe is nothing like auxiliary Te when coupled with dominant Ni.
Oh, let's have a pity party competition! You're right; it's not. It's worse. Because INFJs would love ever so much to do their own thing, but they feel responsible for the feelings of everyone around them. They would also love to withdraw from society, but they feel responsible for that, too. Often they can't go off and take care of their own needs until someone gives them explicit permission to, and even then it can still feel selfish. I don't think INTJs have any idea what it means to perpetually "feel selfish." Fe sux ballz.
 

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I don't think INTJs have any idea what it means to perpetually "feel selfish." Fe sux ballz.
You're right. Get called selfish, but rarely feel it.

On the withdrawing thing; it's easy to rationalise such behaviour, for better or worse. Maybe it's not such a bad thing that you have a counter-mechanism, because in all honesty, I do it even when I probably shouldn't. In other words, it can be a strength, but also a pretty significant weakness that exacerbates a lot of other problems.
 

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Oh, let's have a pity party competition! You're right; it's not. It's worse. Because INFJs would love ever so much to do their own thing, but they feel responsible for the feelings of everyone around them. They would also love to withdraw from society, but they feel responsible for that, too. Often they can't go off and take care of their own needs until someone gives them explicit permission to, and even then it can still feel selfish. I don't think INTJs have any idea what it means to perpetually "feel selfish." Fe sux ballz.
Lol, thank you for the great response! But pity is not the name of the game- understanding is all.

Though there is a slight deviation for myself, most of what you said are inline with how I feel most of the time. Though my concern is not for an individual per say, but for all of humanity.

When I hear a story of struggle, I don’t initially think: “Hmmm, how can I help this person overcome this struggle?”

Instead, I think: “Hmmmmmmmmm, how can I solve this problem for everyone?”

If I truly am an INTJ, then I would assert we feel the same selfishness. Especially when our want and need to better humanity is thwarted by our need to be reclusive.

Did you bring the sparkling apple cider?:laughing:
 

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If I truly am an INTJ, then I would assert we feel the same selfishness. Especially when our want and need to better humanity is thwarted by our need to be reclusive.
That's it! We're reversed! Our want and need to be reclusive is thwarted by our need to better humanity!

Did you bring the sparkling apple cider?:laughing:
Oh, are you a lightweight? :wink: I brought:

vodka.jpg
Let's feel sorry for ourselves Balkan style!
 
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Lol, thank you for the great response! But pity is not the name of the game- understanding is all.

Though there is a slight deviation for myself, most of what you said are inline with how I feel most of the time. Though my concern is not for an individual per say, but for all of humanity.

When I hear a story of struggle, I don’t initially think: “Hmmm, how can I help this person overcome this struggle?”

Instead, I think: “Hmmmmmmmmm, how can I solve this problem for everyone?”

If I truly am an INTJ, then I would assert we feel the same selfishness. Especially when our want and need to better humanity is thwarted by our need to be reclusive.

Did you bring the sparkling apple cider?:laughing:
I think you are intj 5w4 so/sx. The totem.

https://www.personalitycafe.com/head-triad-types-5-6-7/211674-social-fives-according-beatrice-chestnut.html

Sent from my SO-03J sans PC
 

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Oh, let's have a pity party competition! You're right; it's not. It's worse. Because INFJs would love ever so much to do their own thing, but they feel responsible for the feelings of everyone around them. They would also love to withdraw from society, but they feel responsible for that, too. Often they can't go off and take care of their own needs until someone gives them explicit permission to, and even then it can still feel selfish. I don't think INTJs have any idea what it means to perpetually "feel selfish." Fe sux ballz.
Nah, instead we are perpetually ineffective. :shocked:
 

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That's it! We're reversed! Our want and need to be reclusive is thwarted by our need to better humanity!



Oh, are you a lightweight? :wink: I brought:

View attachment 831891
Let's feel sorry for ourselves Balkan style!
Lightweight would be too generous. Even featherweight would be optimistic. No, I don't even step in the ring.:wink:
 

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This is the kind of feedback I crave. I am curious as to how others perceive me because I know my own perception may be faulty.

But I must say: I am not very social. Online I may seem social but, if you notice, most of the time my interactions are to further my knowledge by attempting to have my theories proven false through debate. I am actually highly introverted. When I go out with my SO and kids I may seem extraverted because of my confidence, but I drain very quickly so most of the time I pace myself so I don't burn out too soon.

Every enneagram test I have taken has resulted in 1w9. What's funny is I retook it last night and just went all to one side or the other and got 5w6. I read up on 5's and though some of it seemed correct, it mostly didn't feel correct. IDK...

But thank you for the assessment. Keep them coming if you have more suggestions.

Well, I went back and read through the enneagram again and I would say 1w9 fits the bill better than any other. I might even say on the healthier side. Dare I assert Level 1.

https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/type-1

This bit sounds correct as well; even the anger and rage part of Ones.
https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/how-the-enneagram-system-works

This genuinely feels...right. I am open to other suggestions. :happy:
 

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This is the kind of feedback I crave. I am curious as to how others perceive me because I know my own perception may be faulty.

But I must say: I am not very social. Online I may seem social but, if you notice, most of the time my interactions are to further my knowledge by attempting to have my theories proven false through debate. I am actually highly introverted. When I go out with my SO and kids I may seem extraverted because of my confidence, but I drain very quickly so most of the time I pace myself so I don't burn out too soon.

Every enneagram test I have taken has resulted in 1w9. What's funny is I retook it last night and just went all to one side or the other and got 5w6. I read up on 5's and though some of it seemed correct, it mostly didn't feel correct. IDK...

But thank you for the assessment. Keep them coming if you have more suggestions.

Well, I went back and read through the enneagram again and I would say 1w9 fits the bill better than any other. I might even say on the healthier side. Dare I assert Level 1.

https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/type-1

This bit sounds correct as well; even the anger and rage part of Ones.
https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/how-the-enneagram-system-works

This genuinely feels...right. I am open to other suggestions. :happy:
Apology for my indecent 'poking'. That was inteded just fun exploration :eek:h:

It appear that I am aspiring to be perfect, a 1, but my personal deficiencies and insecurities have made me to settle in 5. Not that it is bad in itself since I can perform different role in the grand scheme of things and still contribute to the betterment of all. So, I am the totem, nice to meet you again man.
 

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Apology for my indecent 'poking'. That was inteded just fun exploration :eek:h:

It appear that I am aspiring to be perfect, a 1, but my personal deficiencies and insecurities have made me to settle in 5. Not that it is bad in itself since I can perform different role in the grand scheme of things and still contribute to the betterment of all. So, I am the totem, nice to meet you again man.
:laughing: flew well over my head.

Maybe not a 5 then, but another level of 1...
 

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1
Why do INTJs go into hiding?
2
What are you doing?
3
What makes you come back out?
1. Because they do not want to be found. Are going through a selective friendship/companionship phase, separating real from fake. Or, have a need for Peace, Quiet, Introspection, and Solitude.

2. Solitary things. Evaluating life path and making course changes. And/or going through yet another process of reinvention of self and Self.

3. Nothing externally and definitely nobody can influence what will take a paradigm/ethos INTJ shift to come out of "hiding".

INTJ's don't hide, they simply go through periods of highly selective interaction with the world, specifically real or fake people.
 

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I am an INFJ, however, my best friend is an INTJ and we are very close. I've noticed that he's pretty consistent with communication, except when he has to reconfigure his brain.

This happens once a year on average. He will get a major epiphany about something we are discussing and he needs to recalibrate his brain. It often lasts on average for 3 weeks. He completely isolates himself while he's going through it. He then comes back with a different vibe about him. It's very cute.

Not sure if other INTJs can relate.
 

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I am an INFJ, however, my best friend is an INTJ and we are very close. I've noticed that he's pretty consistent with communication, except when he has to reconfigure his brain.

This happens once a year on average. He will get a major epiphany about something we are discussing and he needs to recalibrate his brain. It often lasts on average for 3 weeks. He completely isolates himself while he's going through it. He then comes back with a different vibe about him. It's very cute.

Not sure if other INTJs can relate.
I wish i can have friend like you.

Sent from my SO-03J sans PC
 

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It's not hiding really. I personally care a lot about The time I spend with people being interesting and meaningful and too much communication and chatting results in mediocre conversation without any context. So I wait until I or my friends have anything to say. I'm lucky that I have friends who understand me enough not to get distant or feel insecure (mostly INTPs)

Also going out in public wears me out so much I can't get anything done for the rest of the day so I try to compact all my "outdoor" work in one day.
 

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Why do INTJs go into hiding?
When I lose direction and purpose, discover my life is not working as intended, or come against a critical obstacle that I can't surmount.

What are you doing?
Digesting experience, soul searching, researching, and reorienting mindset to generate a new plan.

What makes you come back out?
Once I am satisfied with the new plan enough to begin work on it.

This specifically refers to 'hiding', as an intent to conceal oneself, which is different from simply not being available socially.
 

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ENFP's (OP) frame it as 'hiding' cause they're trying to find one of us cause they're so hung up on their visions of the perfect Idealistic relationship & they believe all the idealistic prophesy about ENFP/INTJ being most perfect optimum Relationship. Cause INTJ's don't realy give a ashit about 'Relationship' perse' but rather IDEAS! ENFP's always think we're some difficult thing to find. But If one of them would start approaching an Introvert and troll said Introvert with an actual Original off the wall Abstract Idea; INTJ is not that hard to locate as all other introverts won't know what to do with such an approach - theyre more into "OOHhhhh your hair & nails are jusss. SOOOoooo on it today. An where'd you gah eettt that out fit - sister Give me name to store!..... blah blah blah.......

<<<<<<--------------------take it frum a koon!

I'm still waiting for an ENFP to come up to me and ask me about how the Earth's crustal deep internal Ground water system may have possible earthquake ramifications along the plate techtonic ridges along with the interactions of volcanic hydraulics regarding predictions of Volcanic eruptions............ If she would talk like this ANND! look like a porn slut thats all I could ever ask for.
jes sayin.
 
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Me: Mutual INTP friend asked where you've been/why you've been in hiding.
INTJ: I don't like hanging out with your group anymore.
Me: If that's the case, tell her that yourself (realizes he's trying to push my buttons).
INTJ: I'm joking!
Me: Looks like I can push your buttons too... all of them, all at once.
INTJ: You suck, f**k you.
Me: Bahhahaa

eta: found out he's dealing with some personal issues, so I figured I'd just leave him to his peace, and he'd come back whenever he was ready.
 

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Why do INTJs go into hiding? What are you doing? What makes you come back out?

Do you know if anyone has come up with a gadget that detects hidden INTJs?

Here is a real life experiment.

1. Stopped texting, calling, emailing, etc, everyone that I usually interact with. Wait and see who initiates contact.
(usually I'm the one that's alway "reaching out", socially assertive.)

2. Result: 20+ contacts dwindled to 3 in a matter of weeks if not days. Further dwindled to 2-3 after 1-2 months.

3. This is how to separate fake from real friends.

INTJ's go into hiding?
No. INTJ's occasionally step back to observe and evaluate where efforts are worthwhile and where it is wasted.

Once doing so, INTJ's proceed carefully and methodically to engage with others and the world in a "new and improved" way that is more meaningful, gratifying, and adds to personal growth.

Sometimes the above process is painful. Clarity is always painful. An INTJ can play with self-deception rather than accept the reality of things but only for a few seconds at a time. An INTJ will always travel the path of truth and reality, eventually.

Nobody on the planet can change the above. Only an INTJ can "re-enter life and society" on his/her own terms, so to speak.
 
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