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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
This came up in another thread and inquiring ENFP minds want to know: Why are you ISTPs so drawn to us? We can think of lots of reasons we think you're awesome and we tell you all the time, but we're curious about your thoughts. (about us!)

And we know you're probably busy, involved in some solitary artistic pursuit, or on the Bowflex or maybe trying out some new, high-tech power tools, but we'd really like to hear from you. I'm not making fun of you, either. I know ISTPs who love all those things!

please share what you like about extroverted intuitive types. We'll leave you alone after that... if that's what you want. :')
 

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Discussion Starter #3
Treebob, is shadow the same as the duality concept? I get bogged down learning about cognitive functions and shadow traits always seem negative to me. I guess we ENFPs feel surprised sometimes that people like us. But you're saying the attraction is mutual as far as the functions go?
 
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Treebob, is shadow the same as the duality concept? I get bogged down learning about cognitive functions and shadow traits always seem negative to me. I guess we ENFPs feel surprised sometimes that people like us. But you're saying the attraction is mutual as far as the functions go?
I haven't read much on duality as it is Socionics. In fact you might not even be an ENFP in Socionics. My theory is completly based on shadow functions. If you look arounf the net you will find differeing opinions on shadow relationships (to some degree).

I should update that thread. I am in a semi relationship with an ISTJ right now and it is wonderful. This means my final missing type is a success as well.
 
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Not sure about ISTP and ENFP, but I am an ENTP, and am having an amazing relationship with an ISTP. Best match I've ever had. It was a rough ride the first month -- I think it might have been the S versus N. Mostly it has taken time to figure out how each other takes things in and then how we communicate it. I also find I am learning TONS from being with an introvert. He is an absolute sweetheart and funny as hell. He never has to say much about how he feels about me because I see it in his eyes and in the way he touches me. As well as in the nice things he does for me. I get to shower him in all kinds of extroverted affection, and he loves it. Our brains work pretty darn differently and I think we are learning to appreciate those differences rather than have conflict over them. S and N can be very complimentary.
 

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Shoot, I don't know! Well, I don't know how to put it to words anyway. It seems like "compliment" is the word to use here; you've got everything we believe we lack. I don't really have a full answer to give you, but I'll come back later after I think about this a little. Like I said, I don't have the words yet!
 

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Shoot, I don't know! Well, I don't know how to put it to words anyway. It seems like "compliment" is the word to use here; you've got everything we believe we lack. I don't really have a full answer to give you, but I'll come back later after I think about this a little. Like I said, I don't have the words yet!
What is it you guys think you lack? :mellow:

Idk what we could really offer you. You guys seem pretty awesome the way you are lol
 

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its the other extreme. I've always viewed myself as dating 2 types of girls, someone who is solitary and very relaxed that shares my similar interests... or someone the complete opposite; someone who is very popular and outgoing, yet still an individual that doesn't conform to society mindlessly. I think ENFP's fit that description. I personally would probably go for an ENFP or another ISTP.

plus when I read that ENFP was the duality relationship, I had no idea what an ENFP was, so I decided to investigate.

I don't think I really know ANY enfp's.
 

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I get to shower him in all kinds of extroverted affection, and he loves it. Our brains work pretty darn differently and I think we are learning to appreciate those differences rather than have conflict over them. S and N can be very complimentary.
I'll second that! :happy:


ETA: I find that ISTPs are physically attracted to ISFPs, ESFPs, and ESFJs... until they lose interest and get annoyed or bored.
 

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Discussion Starter #10
yes, In socionics I'm an IEE, I think. At least on this site: Socionic Types I really find it fun to read with tons of information. I would consider an ISTP to be like an SLI on this socionics page.

DJArendee makes a good point about dating someone who is the same type or else dating the ENFP. I have an older ISTP friend and I hope to ask him sometime if most of the women he's dated have been extroverted and if not, intuitive. We get along great. I would think an ENFP's talkativeness could be annoying at times, but we are very individualistic and spontaneous, and so are ISTPs.

I see you as like a... a shelter, a safe harbor of reticence, with intermittent expressions of emotion like sunlit ocean waves washing over my ankles. And stuff like that. (Blushes)
 

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All the ENFPs I know are funny, quick and adventurous (mentally - not in a base-jumping way). The sharp wit and the love of life is attractive. I love life too, in a wholly different way, but I think that's where we overlap. My little sis is ENFP and she's one of my favourite people in the world.
 

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All these other ISTPs have explained it as well as I can hope to. Especially with what DJArendee said about the duality relationship between the two types. It just FEELS right with this type.

What is it you guys think you lack? :mellow:

Idk what we could really offer you. You guys seem pretty awesome the way you are lol
Well, you're extroverts for starters. That's huge to us! Or to me anyway.

Your entire outlook on life is different from ours, in an intriguing way. Even your words here TKae, that kind of affirmation means a lot to us. You see, one reason we don't give verbal affirmation as much as you do is that we REALLY mean it when we say it. The thing is... so do you! I've never met a "fake" ENFP, and they almost always have many genuine good things to say about those around them. And they're usually humble when they do it. I love that!
 

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Discussion Starter #14
All the things you share here help us ENFPs understand. I worry sometimes that ISTPs (and introverts in general maybe) think I'm being insincere when I'm open about how much I like them. It sounds like you who have responded here know that we're sincere in our praises. And I don't know about other ENFPs but I'm always surprised when you like me too.

ENFPs tend to say what we're thinking even as a part of realizing what we actually are thinking. I'm terrible for sending a txt and then sending one or two more as i continue to express a thought. I worry that's annoying, but I still do it. I get the feeling you all think everything through until you know what you think and then you say it, (if you do say it) with as few words as necessary. A friend of mine who's an ISTP wont respond to txts often, and I'm ok with it, but then I wonder if I'm getting on his nerves. But then out of the blue I'll get five txts from him as he tells me an entire joke, or a philosophy from the Art Of War or the Desiderata. I find you all facinating; I have such an affinity for you.

So it just 'feels' right for you too? Wonderful!
 

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All these other ISTPs have explained it as well as I can hope to. Especially with what DJArendee said about the duality relationship between the two types. It just FEELS right with this type.



Well, you're extroverts for starters. That's huge to us! Or to me anyway.

Your entire outlook on life is different from ours, in an intriguing way. Even your words here TKae, that kind of affirmation means a lot to us. You see, one reason we don't give verbal affirmation as much as you do is that we REALLY mean it when we say it. The thing is... so do you! I've never met a "fake" ENFP, and they almost always have many genuine good things to say about those around them. And they're usually humble when they do it. I love that!
I'm actually an INFP. I got confused and posted for some reason lol
 

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All the things you share here help us ENFPs understand. I worry sometimes that ISTPs (and introverts in general maybe) think I'm being insincere when I'm open about how much I like them. It sounds like you who have responded here know that we're sincere in our praises. And I don't know about other ENFPs but I'm always surprised when you like me too.

ENFPs tend to say what we're thinking even as a part of realizing what we actually are thinking. I'm terrible for sending a txt and then sending one or two more as i continue to express a thought. I worry that's annoying, but I still do it. I get the feeling you all think everything through until you know what you think and then you say it, (if you do say it) with as few words as necessary. A friend of mine who's an ISTP wont respond to txts often, and I'm ok with it, but then I wonder if I'm getting on his nerves. But then out of the blue I'll get five txts from him as he tells me an entire joke, or a philosophy from the Art Of War or the Desiderata. I find you all facinating; I have such an affinity for you.

So it just 'feels' right for you too? Wonderful!
The best thing I can say... is that something just "clicks". I just love your type and everything about it.
 

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its the other extreme. I've always viewed myself as dating 2 types of girls, someone who is solitary and very relaxed that shares my similar interests... or someone the complete opposite; someone who is very popular and outgoing, yet still an individual that doesn't conform to society mindlessly. I think ENFP's fit that description. I personally would probably go for an ENFP or another ISTP.

plus when I read that ENFP was the duality relationship, I had no idea what an ENFP was, so I decided to investigate.

I don't think I really know ANY enfp's.
Agreed with all of this which makes me beg the question, who said we were hot for ENFPs? I may be hot for a certain type of person but would this person confirm they're ENFP? Probably not. I like DJ want either a quiet solitary type with a love for creativity or a playmate who would start ripping off my clothes out in the wilderness (notice I did not say in public where others could witness it).
 

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Discussion Starter #19
Thanks Red Ranger! The feeling's mutual! It comes up in other threads where we ENFPs are talking about how wonderful we think ISTPs are, trying to figure out how we get paired up so often, and it occurred to us to wonder what you see in us. We seem to be opposites, but I think the P really does help us, because neither is that critical or controlling and we both have sucha respect for personal freedom and space. The title of the thread is provocative; that's all. I have no doubt you are attracted to all types.

And the functianalysts' s description of a "quiet solitary type with a love for creativity or a playmate who would start ripping off my clothes out in the wilderness..." does sound like an ENFP or an ISTP. I think we're more likely to be a quiet solitary type when we're alone with you because you have a calming influence on us. But we love wild humor and talking about everything too. And we feel like we'll burst if we can't tell you what we love about you.

OK, this could be venturing into overshare, but...In highschool, I had no idea about personality typing. I liked a boy who may have been an ISTP but I'm not sure. He was introverted. After we kissed, I didn't get to see him for a couple weeks, and I finally couldn't stand it. When I finally saw him, I took him aside and said, "I have to tell you what I liked about kissing you!" He smiled and the look he had is one I have seen since, usually in guys I know, or at least think, are ISTPs. He never told me he liked kissing me, but he liked kissing me! Back then I needed to hear it, but he just wanted to. I understand now, that is called 'non-verbal' communication. I was such a goof!

Anyway, thanks for sharing.
 
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