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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
So, I've been working in an office where my boss is an ESFP and one of his employees is an INTJ. My boss harasses the heck out of the INTJ to the point that the INTJ has become so "introverted" that he won't even crack a smile anymore and tends to hide back in his corner cube so he can avoid being harrassed. The INTJ doesn't even have to do anything to raise the bosses ire. It just happens.

Do ESFPs have it out for INTJs? Do ESFPs get off on some sort of power trip?
 

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God of 1000 Suns
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Why don't you just tell him off or fucking report him, grow a damn backbone and stand up for your fellow employee. Threaten to quit and take a united front or some shit. THE VERY LEAST you can do is to tell your boss that you disapprove of his actions. Don't just stand there and watch while your colleague gets bullied around, and then come to some forum to vent about it. He'll probably back the fuck down since esfp are easily affected by anxiety and he'll freak out if something really does start happening. How do you even know he's an esfp?

My best friend is an intj and we make a great team at video games. I'm the best man at his wedding coming up. My older sister is INTJ and she is my favorite sibling. I love NTj's because they know so much more than us, and they help me out in so many aspects of my life. Some of my best and logest friends are NTJ's.
 

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So, I've been working in an office where my boss is an ESFP and one of his employees is an INTJ. My boss harasses the heck out of the INTJ to the point that the INTJ has become so "introverted" that he won't even crack a smile anymore and tends to hide back in his corner cube so he can avoid being harrassed. The INTJ doesn't even have to do anything to raise the bosses ire. It just happens.

Do ESFPs have it out for INTJs? Do ESFPs get off on some sort of power trip?
That honestly sounds more like something an ESTP would do.... I've seen an ESFP get kind of mean before, but not necessarily harass. However, I guess any feeler can have a bad side even though they are sensitive themselves.
 
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Discussion Starter #4
That honestly sounds more like something an ESTP would do.... I've seen an ESFP get kind of mean before, but not necessarily harass. However, I guess any feeler can have a bad side even though they are sensitive themselves.
If a feeler has a bad side and they are sensitive, do they realize they are hurting someone and just not care? I was always under the opnion that ESFP had some sense of caring inside of them. If that goes away, what has the ESFP become?
 

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Anxiety for me usually comes on because I realizes I have done something wrong that I had previously not thought about. Our dominant function is to be a SENSOR not a feeler first, this goes with estp as well. This means that the person will take action based on his surroundings and situation of the present moment. This can cause an immature sensor to just do what feels good or right in the moment and forget about all else. Without new sensory data to try to filter though his introverted feeling function, nothing can be learned. Someone needs to make it clear to him that its not cool of him to do these things. Someone needs to take action.

If things stay the way they are and no one speaks up about it. Its just going to keep happening because no one has pointed out how much of a jackass he is. He needs to be made aware of the consequences of his actions or he will get the idea that there are no consequences and continue this behavior..

Yes a esfp, once made aware, should either feel bad or is evil.
 

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Why don't you just tell him off or fucking report him, grow a damn backbone and stand up for your fellow employee. Threaten to quit and take a united front or some shit. THE VERY LEAST you can do is to tell your boss that you disapprove of his actions. Don't just stand there and watch while your colleague gets bullied around, and then come to some forum to vent about it.
This seems a little drastic and may lead to further unnecessary issues. I'm sure he has a backbone though. To me he just seems interested in the relationship dynamics of the different types.

I agree with thegirlcandance, that does sound more ESTP because I've confronted my friend about doing the same exact thing as your boss. I confronted her privately and she realized her mistake in judgment. I think why it worked for me is because we're actually very good friends and she respects what I say (sometimes lol).
 

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This seems a little drastic and may lead to further unnecessary issues. I'm sure he has a backbone though. To me he just seems interested in the relationship dynamics of the different types.
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I know, I realized that I was being defensive about it all, and I apologize to you breathe. I just really think something should be done still. I don't like to see people get bullied around or feel overwhelmed because I've seen it happen too many times in offices. It makes me angry. There are regulations in place to handle these things. Human resource managers.
 
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Discussion Starter #8
Thank you for all the answers so far. I really am more interested in the reason behind "The Clash," than getting involved in it. I don't want to be harrassed too.

It is quite clear in my office who is who personality-wise. We all had to take the MBTI recently and that just added a spark to the already ongoing clash between the ESFP and the INTJ. Personally speaking, I very much enjoy the INTJ because he is personable, whereas the ESFP boss is sort of on the evil side.

I guess I'm just wondering at this point why our ESFP boss turned evil (or already was evil) and why he has chosen to take it out on the INTJ. I know there are a lot of unknowns here, so all I have to go on are their personalities and fleeting glimpses of the INTJ scampering away before the boss shows up.

Mmm...human resources. I'm trying really hard not to laugh. That's what office I am in. FYI...I'm new to the office and don't want to make waves yet, that and losing my job would suck.
 

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I really am more interested in the reason behind "The Clash," than getting involved in it. I don't want to be harrassed too.
The clash is that INTJ and ESFP are shadows of each other, and naturally do not understand one another during first contact. I tend to see that I fight fire with fire, meaning if someone comes off to me as emotionless and too analytical or mean, then I'm going to act the same way until I get some other kind of input. I use to be pretty mean to some kids when I was in high school, we can go on a power trip if no one puts us in our place. esfp are really very insecure and can be self absorbed, and need to be slapped.

I made a kid cry, and it made me realize that he wasn't a jerk or being obnoxious just to annoy me, but that he was just trying to be funny and make people laugh. It made me feel bad, and I realized that I use to be bulled too when I was younger and how it made me feel. Just as I can go into asshole mode, the fact that he showed me some of his sad feelings made me vibe with that and I did all I could to make things right between me and this person. We even started to talk and share interest.

I am intimidated by people who have something I don't. This can lead to me over compensating in the asshole factor, or fatal attraction.

Mmm...human resources. I'm trying really hard not to laugh. That's what office I am in. FYI...I'm new to the office and don't want to make waves yet, that and losing my job would suck.
there has to be something you can do, someone you can call or tell. Who manages the managers.
 

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Hmm, I've found the ESFPs I know to be very understanding and open to differences. I think it's less of a misunderstanding and just an asshole being an asshole.
 

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Hmm, I've found the ESFPs I know to be very understanding and open to differences. I think it's less of a misunderstanding and just an asshole being an asshole.
I think you're right too. It doesn't seem realistic to view every person's interaction through the lens of a structured personality system.
 

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I guess I'm just wondering at this point why our ESFP boss turned evil (or already was evil) and why he has chosen to take it out on the INTJ. I know there are a lot of unknowns here, so all I have to go on are their personalities and fleeting glimpses of the INTJ scampering away before the boss shows up.
Perhaps it is because INTJs don't respect authority or hierarchy just because it is. They can clash with somebody on workplace about this, somebody who thinks that they should be given respect just because they are a step higher. INTJs are highly individualistic and can lack diplomacy at times expressing their views. Most likely the INTJ said something that your 'evil' boss thought was demeaning to him. So right now he cannot forgive and is hounding out the INTJ i.e. your boss is insecure and INTJ is hitting or has hit his weak spot somehow so this is your boss' payback.

Only way to find out for sure though is to talk to one of them and ask what's up. It is affecting you too after all - it is also your workplace, not just theirs, so they should like work it out instead of making other people work in place with everlasting conflict.
 

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My father is an INTJ, i'm an ESFP. We're still having issues communicating on a real level.

Usually i'd expect the INTJ to be in authority over the ESFP, as i'm finding far too many ESFP followers than authoritative figures.
But in this case, the INTJ is intimidated by the ESFP's upfront manner concerning handling issues. I agree, harassing is out of chracter for an ESFP. I'd think the ESFP would be way too worried about the consequences/ empathetic to what its like being harrassed to actually act on it. I'd say this is an act of extroverted SJ types.. ESFP's are far too passive aggressive.
 

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Based solely on your information and what I know of personality stereotypes, I would guess that:

The INTJ doesn't really like the ESFP as a boss, for some perceived inadequacy in leadership. The ESFP picked up on this, considers it a threat to their position, and is attempting to prevent an attack that wasn't even going to happen by trying to publicly intimidate the INTJ, thus preventing them from usurping the ESFP's authority, and preserving the stability of the office, which is part of their job.

Meanwhile, the INTJ develops an even worse opinion of the ESFJ, by writing off the preemptive defense as an ape-like posturing of dominance that serves no purpose but the gratification of the ESFP feeling like they are doing what is 'right.' The INTJ may even believe that the ESFP is threatened by the INTJ's assumed 'air of superiority', which may or may not be true, but doesn't likely come into play in the actual conflict anyway. The INTJ is still willing to do their job, but feels that the ESFP is interfering with that, and the the ESFP must be worked around in order to get anything done. The INTJ's stubborn refusal to acknowledge the ESFP, and just the general avoidance may cause the ESFP to eventually become paranoid that the INTJ is plotting something, which they may or may not be.

To solve the issue, the INTJ should stop making it so obvious that they think their boss is inadequate, and the ESFP should calm down and realize that their is nothing to get worked up over.
The INTJ may falsely believe that they are keeping their ego hidden.
The ESFP may falsely believe that because they are the boss their actions are justified, or even necessary, in order to keep the office working.

Either way, it makes an interesting study.

Edit: The boss does sound a little SJ, and it could be that their J is underscored with a high P.
 
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Thank you for all the answers so far. I really am more interested in the reason behind "The Clash," than getting involved in it. I don't want to be harrassed too.
In my experience NTs can tend to (even unwittingly) manipulate ESFPs. For instance, an NT will disagree with something just to try to get an ESFP to discuss something and immediately the ESFP may try do something show the NT that they see that side and the NT too may be right. Which then irritates the living heck out of the NT because they don't want to be agreed with, they want to know the other POV. However, a slightly evil NT can pick up on this an use it to thier advantage. --That's just an observation, and now that I think about it, has nothing to do with your scenario.

The other thing, is most ISTJs I know are so quiet and don't notice what is going on around them. That could be what originally offended the ESFP and started the whole deal. I can see an ESFP being ticked because INTJ didn't say hi when they walked past each other at the mall. Then ESFP tried to approach INTJ at work about something social, INTJ thinks "hmmm, jerkoff isn't even here to work, here I am working away and ESFP is just socializing all day" and the ball is rolling downhill from there

... whereas the ESFP boss is sort of on the evil side.
I guess I'm just wondering at this point why our ESFP boss turned evil (or already was evil) and why he has chosen to take it out on the INTJ.
Well, I've personally never known a really evil ESFP (yet) but maybe they are just a nasty person. Or maybe there is some personal thing that went down that you don't know about, some bad water under the bridge or something.
 

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So, I've been working in an office where my boss is an ESFP and one of his employees is an INTJ. My boss harasses the heck out of the INTJ to the point that the INTJ has become so "introverted" that he won't even crack a smile anymore and tends to hide back in his corner cube so he can avoid being harrassed. The INTJ doesn't even have to do anything to raise the bosses ire. It just happens.

I think the ESFP is trying to lighten him up, but maybe not understand how the INTJ really feels, so he keeps on going. I think the INTJ should talk to the ESFP on a 1 on 1 basis so that the ESFP can understand him more.
 

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I just wanted to point out something cool...


ESFP || INTJ
Se > Fi > Te > Ni || Ni > Te > Fi > Se

Our functions are directed in the same way except in reverse order of each other.
 

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Discussion Starter #19
I just wanted to point out something cool...


ESFP || INTJ
Se > Fi > Te > Ni || Ni > Te > Fi > Se

Our functions are directed in the same way except in reverse order of each other.
Ok, that made no sense to me. Our functions are directed the same way but in reverse? Actually the functions of an INTJ and an ESFP are completely opposite of each other. There is no sameness at all, hence the dilemma that is sparking some office harrassment between an INTJ and an evil ESFP. They are so completely opposite that in my office we have what is called the "Clash."

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Several of the other posts touched on how the two personality types might be perceiving the situation differently and that sounds pretty good to me. The way I understand it, the ESFP thought the INTJ was getting too arrogant. That's actually kind of funny because the INTJ doesn't have a lick of arrogance in him, maybe some confidence because he is good at what he does, but arrogance, no way. He's prone to be more humble than arrogant. So, it looks like the ESFP who felt threatened by this arrogance misread the situation and started the whole thing. Then it just cascaded.

I think I have enough now to at least approach the situation without getting sucked into it. Thanks to all the respondents.
 

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hmm I dunno. I am having an issue at work with an ESFP as well (maybe a T, but don't think so) It seems that even if I am very nice to him, something I did in the past has hurt his self esteem, it seems like my very existence hurts him and he has become very agressive. It's kind of frightening, since I have no way of reasoning with him b.c he just gets defensive and cruel...
 
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