Personality Cafe banner

1 - 11 of 11 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
29 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
i find that i am constantly thinking about work, even though i am not that interested in the work in of itself. its my obsessive trait.

however there is another angle which relates to fear of performance at work also, although i have generally done well

is this a common intp thing, or even just the obsessive thinking

what do others do to remedy and balance their mind generally

thanks
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,497 Posts
It is a stress reaction. Your job consumes you: it is there when you are doing it (physically) and it follows you home (mentally). The former is what you are being paid for, the latter is the problem. However, the physical act of working is the part that needs fixing because (1) it is the cause of the problem, and (2) it is best to obey the voice of mind.

Now, what causes stress-related mental lingering...

New situations that need to, and will, settle: are you in a new position? An entirely new job perhaps? Has something else changed in your work environment of custom (place, people, tasks, ...)? New personal developments that also influence your minset at work?
If any of this is the case, then time should soon sure. I don't have all that much professional experience, but during the first couple of weeks of my three-month internship I could only think of work because it literally felt like 'it was the only thing there is'. My mind must have had a lot of questions and settling to do. All of which mental scenes that did indeed fade after I got accustumed to my new situation.

I would also consider one of two extremes: you hate your job, or you love your job. Both the infatuated and the begrudger can lose themselves in their suspect.
If this might be the case I would say it is best to distantiate yourself from work throughout the working hours itself. Take your job less seriously, implement self-actualizing micro-pauses, and avoid losing yourself in 'the zone' (normally it is adviced to get 'in the zone' of course, but I first of all don't deem it worthy for 9-to-5 mediocrity, and second of all believe it is an unhealthy habit when it concerns a job that already consumes one after the hours even).

Maybe you simply feel the pressure to perform. This could be due to the first reason I pointed out (a new something), or something else that threatens you.
In cae you feel threatened, the issue may be related to competence. INTPs are hard on themselves, so objectively reconsider your quality of work with the standard that is required. You are probably just fine. However, when you feel you are lacking behind, you could (1) look for further education to increase your confidence, integrity and establishment (= promotes stress resistance), (2) ask yourself the honest question of whether your really think/feel you are at the right place (yes, implying a potential career switch).
 

·
Registered
INTP
Joined
·
5,716 Posts
It might be a perfectionist thing, which in turn might be an INTP thing. I tend to want to figure out my job perfectly--to see it as a whole system, so that everything I need to do makes sense and has a solution. If I don't have enough information, or if I have conflicting instructions, it can drive me nuts.

Possible remedies:

1. Have parameters within the job, e.g., think about this particular challenge for 10 minutes (or consult 2 reference works or 2 coworkers) and get on with the task, even if you don't think you have enough info.

2. Be satisfied with "good enough." In my work, I go over everything 3 times. Four or five times would be better, but they don't pay me enough. When I have to look at my old work for one reason or another, I always find mistakes, but everyone loves my work, and I know it's plenty good enough.

3. Have parameters in your life. You aren't really thinking about work all the time, right? Sooner or later you turn off and go to sleep. Try telling yourself that you will turn off your work thoughts at 6 pm, or some other appropriate time.

4. Spend some of your spare time doing things that take a lot of concentration, e.g., yoga poses or weight training exercises where you'll hurt yourself if you let your mind wander. Choir singing or another activity where you need to be really present. These things might not appeal to you, but you probably already have things that will work for you. Could be something as simple as talking to a friend who doesn't want to hear about your work.

5. Give yourself another priority (could be short, medium, or long term), so that work seems less important.

Good luck!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
5,378 Posts
obsessive trait...fear of performance

what do others do to remedy and balance their mind generally
Video games, movies, food, and beer. In other words, escapism. But that's probably not very good advice. At least it doesn't sound like it when I hear myself say it.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,289 Posts
I don't think it's an INTP thing. My wife does that and she's likely ISFJ. Could be enviornmentally inherited. Was that something your parents did a lot?

I don't think I've had that problem in a long time. It's like I have an off switch and when I stop work for the day, I don't even have a job until I wake up the next morning and have to get ready to work again, but then I have tons of interests I immerse myself into as soon as I shutdown my work computer.
 

·
Registered
INTP 9w1-5w4-2w3 xII-Ne
Joined
·
2,615 Posts
Hey, INFJ here. I've been in that sort of situation multiple times. I often find myself overthinking all sorts of things as well relating to work, schoolwork, interactions with people, and other things. There are many different things that may affect it and make it difficult. This is especially when a lot of work and tasks build up. It can be hard when you want to do the best you can but have nagging feeling that it is somehow not good enough. Thinking and analyzing different possibilities can be fun for me but when I get into obsessive mode, it becomes stressful especially because I have trouble turning off my inner chatter.

It's hard to control certain thoughts that we have. It can be overwhelming and I am sorry you experience this too. I would also think about the environment you are in and what the main stresser is. You may not be able to get rid of it altogether but if you have any coping mechanisms for stress, I would suggest to use them. Adjusting to new things can be very difficult. The inward chatter can be near-to-impossible to turn off altogether when the stress buildup is that intense.

Usually, I may read a book or draw to take my mind off of it if it gets to a certain point. Listening to music can also help. There may be something entirely different that works for you. It doesn't make the thoughts go away but it does help me. It also may help to break down what you need to do in a way that may help you. I know you may not be able to do the main coping mechanisms that may work for you in the moment so just keep in mind that you are doing your best.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,313 Posts
There's this culture in many big corporations where it's normal to feel stressed all the time. If you're not stressed, then you're not working hard enough.. is what they think. To reduce the effect of this insanity, you can try to save enough money and learn enough skills so that losing your job does not affect you too much. That's what I've been doing since I joined the workforce.

When saving money, know where all the milestones are. For example, having an emergency fund of six month's living expense is the first milestone (assuming debt free). With this emergency fund, you'll have plenty of time to find a new job if they fire you or if you feel like quitting. Remind yourself of this during stressful situations at work. The second milestone is having enough in investment so that it meets yours minimum living cost to retire. There's something called the 4% rule, where if you save enough so that your annual spending is 4% of your investment savings, then you don't have to work again. So, the second milestone is meeting the minimum. Minimum doesn't mean living like a monk, especially if you develop skills like cooking, gardening, auto repair, and other DIY abilities.

Anyway, I'll stop there. That's my solution of the job problem.. to save money and develop skills. Once you have those, job becomes less serious, which actually improves your performance.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
29 Posts
Discussion Starter #10
There's this culture in many big corporations where it's normal to feel stressed all the time. If you're not stressed, then you're not working hard enough.. is what they think. To reduce the effect of this insanity, you can try to save enough money and learn enough skills so that losing your job does not affect you too much. That's what I've been doing since I joined the workforce.

When saving money, know where all the milestones are. For example, having an emergency fund of six month's living expense is the first milestone (assuming debt free). With this emergency fund, you'll have plenty of time to find a new job if they fire you or if you feel like quitting. Remind yourself of this during stressful situations at work. The second milestone is having enough in investment so that it meets yours minimum living cost to retire. There's something called the 4% rule, where if you save enough so that your annual spending is 4% of your investment savings, then you don't have to work again. So, the second milestone is meeting the minimum. Minimum doesn't mean living like a monk, especially if you develop skills like cooking, gardening, auto repair, and other DIY abilities.

Anyway, I'll stop there. That's my solution of the job problem.. to save money and develop skills. Once you have those, job becomes less serious, which actually improves your performance.
thank you, i have actually been reading a number of books on minimalism, as i think thats the way to go for me, as i dont overly enjoy the work in itself, and although on paper my work may seem envious its not....recently feels overly glorified and lots of stressfl people....quite honestly, since posting this, i have cried once or twice, which is a new for me,....so i know once things are settled a change is needed....what change i dont know yet
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
29 Posts
Discussion Starter #11
thank you all for the comments, i agree with them all in difering degrees, and they have been helpful.

the key i think for me is to find a balance in my life and find a way to mentally detach myself from the stress of others

what has been acute this time, has been working for a self described task master, and thats been challenging, as i cant sit away from this person...so i see light at the end of the current tunnel in a month, and then a long break over the holidays, and january will again be hectic but it will calm thereafter....in between all of that will start reaching out to recruiters and make a change to something hopefully less stressful

part of it is also, in my head i have been chasing the "dream", trying to chase the ladder, and have done well to an extent, but at this juncture it doesnt fit my personality too well, i am not a natural leader, but i have learnt ways of management that help this time around, but the pressure has been too much.

and i quite like this humbling, accepting that the path isnt for me, as its opened the scary possiblity of re-invention, will see, but something does need to change

thank you all
 
1 - 11 of 11 Posts
Top