If by "dump" you mean "slash his tires and carve 'fuck you' into his car with your keys" then yeah, you should totally dump his ass.
Would you dump this guy?
So, here´s me with relationship question again 
SORRY, long text.
He´s ENFP. I´m ISFP. I´ve been seeing him for the last 3-4 months. He´s out of a 5 year relationship with a girl who he was supposed to marry. He´s fun, but he´s been a jerk towards me from the very beginning. For example, when we started dating, on one of the dates, we went out, then he took me to his place, we had sex. Next morning, I didn´t even finish my breakfast, he says to me "Ok, you can go now."
We went iceskating one day, on my way back I hurt my foot so bad that I wasn´t allowed to walk much for a month. One day, he drove me with his car to the cinema and then home to his place, we had sex. Next morning, when I had to go back, he tells me "You have bus number 5". And I shouldn´t walk. And he has a car. Asshole. Or just messages me like "Hey, I´m drunk, come to my place".
I started standing up for myself, so he became better towards me and it seemed like it was going better. But, one weekend we went on a trip to visit his friends, where he openly flirted and danced with another girl in front of me. Other than that it was nice. After that weekend, he didn´t message me for a whole week and I took it as him breaking up with me. I messaged him next weekend "What´s up?" He said, he is very tired cause he worked a lot the whole week and he will stay home this weekend to relax and clean the house cause it´s very dirty. I got the message and said that I would like to come pick up my stuff. He got the message as well, so I came on Monday and took my stuff. We didn´t really talk much, he was nice to me but I was very sad cause he didn´t feel like telling me anything. When I confronted him he said he has unfortunately no feelings for me, but he finds me very nice and friendly and that he thinks it´s better if we stop seing each other because he doesn´t like to take advantage of people. I was like, ok. I thought it was better too, because I didn´t feel like we were on the same wavelength anyway and our communication was always bad.
Meanwhile, an aquantancie (a girl) tells me that he (the ENFP) has been chasing her for the last 2 weeks and that he told her he was single! And he was willing to meet with her that weekedn when he told me he had to clean the house. A male friend doesn´t see anything bad with it though, cause he says "You two were only dating." (?)
After a week, he messages me and asks if I want to go on a trip with him and that he would like to see me. I rejected his offer. A week after that he messages me again, saying he has some of my stuff to give back to me and that he is upset about us breaking up more than he was willing to admit at the beginning and that he would like to talk to me. I said ok. We met, but of course, we dind´t talk. He just assumed we were back together and kissed me. For some reason I rolled with it, idk why. He said some bullshit like, "I thought you wanted to break up with me, so I pretened to be breaking up with you, so that you feel better." Da fuq? Anyway. That was last week. I didn´t mention anything to him about that girl (my aquantancie) yet. But I really wanted to have a talk and not just continue like that. But, yesterday we met for a coffee and he was saying so much shit! I got so pissed and I´m seriously thinking about breaking up with him.
This is a part of the conversation:
Him: I´m so popular, I have conversation now with 5 people (on FB chat)! Julia just messaged me, I told her "I´m on a coffee with a beautiful women".
Me: Who is Julia?
Him: The one from XX, you remember her?
Me: Oh, right! The one you flirted with....
Him: I didn´t flirt with her...oh, yes, yes I have! lol
Me: So why aren´t you with her? Why didn´t you sleep with her?
Him: Well...she is smart, looks nice, is young, but.....oh, wait, I should have slept with her! Lol. Hey, you gotta watch what you are asking lol. Seriously though, she´s only 21 and you live closer and it´s easier.......and I like you.
Me: Oh, so you´re not with her just because she lives too far away....
Him: No, I like you.
Me: Hmm...
...
Him: I´m a bit of an asshole, and I´m not trying to hide it anymore....
...
Me:.......I´m rational....
Him: Lol, you´re with me!
He goes on a trip and to a bdsm fetish party this weekend (cause he´s into that). He invited me to come but I said no, cause I´m not into that.
Him: So, I´m getting back at tuesday.Hopefully we see each other then...
Me. Yeah, after you come back with bunch of diseases...
Him: Oh, I´ll tell you if I had sex. Protected of course. But, if I have sex, it will only be with a strap on. Lol
...
Him: Before that, I was in a relationship with another girl, for 3 years, then she left me without saying why....I cried for a month.
Me: But, you said you can´t cry.
Him: Yeah, i can´t. I couldn´t cry after I broke up with XX. I wish I could cry. Now I just want to be happy. And I´m happy with you for the m.....Really!
I don´t know if you guys can get the tone out of this. It was supposed to be joking, but he was in fact telling the truth. I felt really disrespected and as if he´s trying to fool me or something and I don´t wanna be an idiot. He is always very nice, but I have a feeling like it´s insincere.
He apologized afterwards a couple of times, and said he doesn´t want to lose me cause he likes me, but I just think these are empty words.
If there are any ENFPs here....you could try to explain his behaviour, but he is probably just an asshole and I don´t feel like teaching him how to behave.
On top of all that, his friend (INTJ) is in love with me, and I knew him before I met the ENFP guy. The INTJ introduced me to the ENFP. We tried to keep it from him for a while, but he found out now, and is very hurt and dissapointed and jealous, so I have to deal with his jealousy now too....
Should I even try to talk to the ENFP guy or just ignore him?
SORRY, long text.He´s ENFP. I´m ISFP. I´ve been seeing him for the last 3-4 months. He´s out of a 5 year relationship with a girl who he was supposed to marry. He´s fun, but he´s been a jerk towards me from the very beginning. For example, when we started dating, on one of the dates, we went out, then he took me to his place, we had sex. Next morning, I didn´t even finish my breakfast, he says to me "Ok, you can go now."
We went iceskating one day, on my way back I hurt my foot so bad that I wasn´t allowed to walk much for a month. One day, he drove me with his car to the cinema and then home to his place, we had sex. Next morning, when I had to go back, he tells me "You have bus number 5". And I shouldn´t walk. And he has a car. Asshole. Or just messages me like "Hey, I´m drunk, come to my place".
I started standing up for myself, so he became better towards me and it seemed like it was going better. But, one weekend we went on a trip to visit his friends, where he openly flirted and danced with another girl in front of me. Other than that it was nice. After that weekend, he didn´t message me for a whole week and I took it as him breaking up with me. I messaged him next weekend "What´s up?" He said, he is very tired cause he worked a lot the whole week and he will stay home this weekend to relax and clean the house cause it´s very dirty. I got the message and said that I would like to come pick up my stuff. He got the message as well, so I came on Monday and took my stuff. We didn´t really talk much, he was nice to me but I was very sad cause he didn´t feel like telling me anything. When I confronted him he said he has unfortunately no feelings for me, but he finds me very nice and friendly and that he thinks it´s better if we stop seing each other because he doesn´t like to take advantage of people. I was like, ok. I thought it was better too, because I didn´t feel like we were on the same wavelength anyway and our communication was always bad.
Meanwhile, an aquantancie (a girl) tells me that he (the ENFP) has been chasing her for the last 2 weeks and that he told her he was single! And he was willing to meet with her that weekedn when he told me he had to clean the house. A male friend doesn´t see anything bad with it though, cause he says "You two were only dating." (?)
After a week, he messages me and asks if I want to go on a trip with him and that he would like to see me. I rejected his offer. A week after that he messages me again, saying he has some of my stuff to give back to me and that he is upset about us breaking up more than he was willing to admit at the beginning and that he would like to talk to me. I said ok. We met, but of course, we dind´t talk. He just assumed we were back together and kissed me. For some reason I rolled with it, idk why. He said some bullshit like, "I thought you wanted to break up with me, so I pretened to be breaking up with you, so that you feel better." Da fuq? Anyway. That was last week. I didn´t mention anything to him about that girl (my aquantancie) yet. But I really wanted to have a talk and not just continue like that. But, yesterday we met for a coffee and he was saying so much shit! I got so pissed and I´m seriously thinking about breaking up with him.
This is a part of the conversation:
Him: I´m so popular, I have conversation now with 5 people (on FB chat)! Julia just messaged me, I told her "I´m on a coffee with a beautiful women".
Me: Who is Julia?
Him: The one from XX, you remember her?
Me: Oh, right! The one you flirted with....
Him: I didn´t flirt with her...oh, yes, yes I have! lol
Me: So why aren´t you with her? Why didn´t you sleep with her?
Him: Well...she is smart, looks nice, is young, but.....oh, wait, I should have slept with her! Lol. Hey, you gotta watch what you are asking lol. Seriously though, she´s only 21 and you live closer and it´s easier.......and I like you.
Me: Oh, so you´re not with her just because she lives too far away....
Him: No, I like you.
Me: Hmm...
...
Him: I´m a bit of an asshole, and I´m not trying to hide it anymore....
...
Me:.......I´m rational....
Him: Lol, you´re with me!
He goes on a trip and to a bdsm fetish party this weekend (cause he´s into that). He invited me to come but I said no, cause I´m not into that.
Him: So, I´m getting back at tuesday.Hopefully we see each other then...
Me. Yeah, after you come back with bunch of diseases...
Him: Oh, I´ll tell you if I had sex. Protected of course. But, if I have sex, it will only be with a strap on. Lol
...
Him: Before that, I was in a relationship with another girl, for 3 years, then she left me without saying why....I cried for a month.
Me: But, you said you can´t cry.
Him: Yeah, i can´t. I couldn´t cry after I broke up with XX. I wish I could cry. Now I just want to be happy. And I´m happy with you for the m.....Really!
I don´t know if you guys can get the tone out of this. It was supposed to be joking, but he was in fact telling the truth. I felt really disrespected and as if he´s trying to fool me or something and I don´t wanna be an idiot. He is always very nice, but I have a feeling like it´s insincere.
He apologized afterwards a couple of times, and said he doesn´t want to lose me cause he likes me, but I just think these are empty words.
If there are any ENFPs here....you could try to explain his behaviour, but he is probably just an asshole and I don´t feel like teaching him how to behave.
On top of all that, his friend (INTJ) is in love with me, and I knew him before I met the ENFP guy. The INTJ introduced me to the ENFP. We tried to keep it from him for a while, but he found out now, and is very hurt and dissapointed and jealous, so I have to deal with his jealousy now too....
Should I even try to talk to the ENFP guy or just ignore him?
1 - 20 of 28 Posts
You deserve much better than this. You are not a sex doll. You deserve someone that loves your soul more than your body. If you are still unsure, he is giving you a hint "I'm a bit of an asshole, and I'm not trying to hide it anymore" at least he is honest. An asshole is still an asshole even if he knows it. Wishing you the best.
Sounds like a classic PUA, he's using you as part of a soft harem.So, here´s me with relationship question again
He´s ENFP. I´m ISFP. I´ve been seeing him for the last 3-4 months. He´s out of a 5 year relationship with a girl who he was supposed to marry. He´s fun, but he´s been a jerk towards me from the very beginning. For example, when we started dating, on one of the dates, we went out, then he took me to his place, we had sex. Next morning, I didn´t even finish my breakfast, he says to me "Ok, you can go now."
We went iceskating one day, on my way back I hurt my foot so bad that I wasn´t allowed to walk much for a month. One day, he drove me with his car to the cinema and then home to his place, we had sex. Next morning, when I had to go back, he tells me "You have bus number 5". And I shouldn´t walk. And he has a car. Asshole. Or just messages me like "Hey, I´m drunk, come to my place".
I started standing up for myself, so he became better towards me and it seemed like it was going better. But, one weekend we went on a trip to visit his friends, where he openly flirted and danced with another girl in front of me. Other than that it was nice. After that weekend, he didn´t message me for a whole week and I took it as him breaking up with me. I messaged him next weekend "What´s up?" He said, he is very tired cause he worked a lot the whole week and he will stay home this weekend to relax and clean the house cause it´s very dirty. I got the message and said that I would like to come pick up my stuff. He got the message as well, so I came on Monday and took my stuff. We didn´t really talk much, he was nice to me but I was very sad cause he didn´t feel like telling me anything. When I confronted him he said he has unfortunately no feelings for me, but he finds me very nice and friendly and that he thinks it´s better if we stop seing each other because he doesn´t like to take advantage of people. I was like, ok. I thought it was better too, because I didn´t feel like we were on the same wavelength anyway and our communication was always bad.
Meanwhile, an aquantancie (a girl) tells me that he (the ENFP) has been chasing her for the last 2 weeks and that he told her he was single! And he was willing to meet with her that weekedn when he told me he had to clean the house. A male friend doesn´t see anything bad with it though, cause he says "You two were only dating." (?)
After a week, he messages me and asks if I want to go on a trip with him and that he would like to see me. I rejected his offer. A week after that he messages me again, saying he has some of my stuff to give back to me and that he is upset about us breaking up more than he was willing to admit at the beginning and that he would like to talk to me. I said ok. We met, but of course, we dind´t talk. He just assumed we were back together and kissed me. For some reason I rolled with it, idk why. He said some bullshit like, "I thought you wanted to break up with me, so I pretened to be breaking up with you, so that you feel better." Da fuq? Anyway. That was last week. I didn´t mention anything to him about that girl (my aquantancie) yet. But I really wanted to have a talk and not just continue like that. But, yesterday we met for a coffee and he was saying so much shit! I got so pissed and I´m seriously thinking about breaking up with him.
This is a part of the conversation:
Him: I´m so popular, I have conversation now with 5 people (on FB chat)! Julia just messaged me, I told her "I´m on a coffee with a beautiful women".
Me: Who is Julia?
Him: The one from XX, you remember her?
Me: Oh, right! The one you flirted with....
Him: I didn´t flirt with her...oh, yes, yes I have! lol
Me: So why aren´t you with her? Why didn´t you sleep with her?
Him: Well...she is smart, looks nice, is young, but.....oh, wait, I should have slept with her! Lol. Hey, you gotta watch what you are asking lol. Seriously though, she´s only 21 and you live closer and it´s easier.......and I like you.
Me: Oh, so you´re not with her just because she lives too far away....
Him: No, I like you.
Me: Hmm...
...
Him: I´m a bit of an asshole, and I´m not trying to hide it anymore....
...
Me:.......I´m rational....
Him: Lol, you´re with me!
He goes on a trip and to a bdsm fetish party this weekend (cause he´s into that). He invited me to come but I said no, cause I´m not into that.
Him: So, I´m getting back at tuesday.Hopefully we see each other then...
Me. Yeah, after you come back with bunch of diseases...
Him: Oh, I´ll tell you if I had sex. Protected of course. But, if I have sex, it will only be with a strap on. Lol
...
Him: Before that, I was in a relationship with another girl, for 3 years, then she left me without saying why....I cried for a month.
Me: But, you said you can´t cry.
Him: Yeah, i can´t. I couldn´t cry after I broke up with XX. I wish I could cry. Now I just want to be happy. And I´m happy with you for the m.....Really!
I don´t know if you guys can get the tone out of this. It was supposed to be joking, but he was in fact telling the truth. I felt really disrespected and as if he´s trying to fool me or something and I don´t wanna be an idiot. He is always very nice, but I have a feeling like it´s insincere.
He apologized afterwards a couple of times, and said he doesn´t want to lose me cause he likes me, but I just think these are empty words.
If there are any ENFPs here....you could try to explain his behaviour, but he is probably just an asshole and I don´t feel like teaching him how to behave.
On top of all that, his friend (INTJ) is in love with me, and I knew him before I met the ENFP guy. The INTJ introduced me to the ENFP. We tried to keep it from him for a while, but he found out now, and is very hurt and dissapointed and jealous, so I have to deal with his jealousy now too....
Should I even try to talk to the ENFP guy or just ignore him?
Dump his ass. He's slime.
I'd tell you to warn all mutual acquaintances, but he is likely just to try to spin that as you being a crazy chick.
1 - 20 of 28 Posts
