Personality Cafe banner

You are probably a late bloomer

[INTP] 
11K views 24 replies 24 participants last post by  kiera 
#1 ·
I am talking about your social skills and sexual maturity. I remember when I was a younger kid, I was so enthralled with the new technologies (music, film, video games, etc.), I spent no time developing a social demeanor or developing skills with the opposite sex. I needed to take mental notes on what the hell was going on interpersonally between people before participating myself (now age 21).

Familiar?
 
#6 ·
My story is similar.

I look a little younger than I am and I've only recently (in the past two years) escaped from my crippling social awkwardness. I've always been more intellectually and emotionally mature though. Some of the activities people my age do for amusement seem really immature and boring to me. People who know me online generally think that I am older than I really am. I remember having a conversation with someone online (in an MMO) and when I told him I was 16 (at the time, I'm now 20) he was surprised. Apparently he thought that I was well into my twenties. This happens quite regularly too...
 
#16 ·
that's how things should be, but you know that thing... what happened in Chernobyl... that might have had something to do with this
 
#11 ·
Like most other people on this thread, I'm an early bloomer when it comes to thinking and intelligence and being mature and logical about things, but I'm only just starting to notice how bad I am at relationships. I'm terrible around new people. I don't come off as interesting or funny or cool or even okay - I just come off as someone who'd rather be at home. I realize that people aren't just going to come up to me and say, "You seem like my kind of person!" and start a conversation. I know that I have to start developing social skills NOW before it's too late and I can't cling on to my close friends. Out in the big, bad world.

As for...*cough*...sexual maturity...*giggle*...I have certain feelings for certain people - certain unreachable, unobtainable, god-like people who are much too old anyway. But I haven't felt the need for a boyfriend or anything. It's way, way down at the bottom of my priorities list. Way, way, WAY below school and education and things that should be important to people but aren't. So I don't know.

If you're wondering where this all ties in with age, I'm 14. But I don't think age really matters internally. My thoughts don't have much to do with my age.
 
#13 ·
I think that more often than not, though I would prefer gender to be crossed off of the list as the definition of anyone, that the female INTPs are probably early bloomers in comparison to the males because we're conditioned to do so. But that's just my own theory. Feel free to shoot it down if you want (because I wish that gender norms, stereotypes, etc didn't exist at all).

And also, I must add that I feel like I was an early bloomer. And I feel most comfortable around older people, as I always have. My sexual nature started from an age of about 5, when I had my first attraction towards someone.
 
  • Like
Reactions: feefafo
#17 ·
I spent most of my Jr and high school days talking with, thinking about, and chasing girls. Girls dominated my thoughts. I lacked any real adult influence or guidance to seriously pursue academics. I was more interested in girls than college, and back then I thought the people in college were boring. I went on then to work at the largest gentleman's club in the city for seven years and developed social skills on a level few can understand. If any INTPs on here have worked show biz, nightclubs, or crowds I would enjoy talking to you about those subjects - Message meh. Now I have grown beyond the limits of that job and take a serious academic interest as an adult.

Relationships are kinda different, I wish I was better with 'real' relationships.

Socially, when I was young, in Jr high and high school, I took a lot of crap from teachers, some kids, and adults. I just took it, thinking that they knew something I did not. I have grown out of this also. If I have to suffer a negative opinion of myself, I will return the favor. Additionally, I will not be put in the corner by anyone. I may put THEM in the corner for that:) I wouldn't recommend this attitude with law enforcement - it has gotten me arrested b4.
 
#18 ·
Early bloomer for relationships and sex; late bloomer for social skills, of which I still have none :p
 
#20 ·
I still wonder why children my age (twelve to thirteen) giggle when the word 'sex' is mentioned. The entire middle school seems completely immature, but I think I can understand.

People think I'm interesting, though, and they like to chase me.
 
  • Like
Reactions: feefafo
#22 ·
I hate the giggling. Every time someone giggles, I want to shove a long and spiky object down their throat. Okay, that was a bit of an understatement.

Its weird how most INTPs don't mind people being sad and stuff, but I do. A lot. Only when its a friend though. I try to provoke some sort of laughter or something like that. Its just really unsettling when people I know are sad. Its also weird how I talk really fast, but thats another matter.
 
#21 ·
I'm 20 and after spending one year in college plus an additional few months on antidepressants, I can safely say that my social anxiety is disappearing quite a bit.

When I'm stoned, I'm super anxious around people. To the point of walking away.

My social skills have grown considerably since my first semester in college... and my second...

I'm still a reclusive introverted weird-ass nerd, but hey, I'm tryin'. :tongue:
 
#24 ·
I (female) was an early bloomer regarding my intellectual development and my interest in sex. But I am a late bloomer where social skills and "normal" adult behaviour is concerned. I am over 30 now, and still wonder how other people manage to socialise without effort (well, maybe that just makes me a freak :wink:).
 
#25 ·
Romantic relationships are simple. At this point, I don't want any romance in my life--far too much drama. I have dated, and for a long time I was convinced that dating was an important aspect of life. When I was in my late teens I came to the realization that romantic relationships don't have to matter to me. Now here I am. Maybe I'm a late bloomer. I suppose it doesn't really matter to me.

As for general social interactions, I suppose that is more complex. Some may say I am a late bloomer (I guess), but that's not entirely true. When I was a child, and I met a new person, I would make a terrible first impression. I came across as completely socially awkward, a nerd, and just plain old weird. When I was in high school and I believed that social interactions were the most important thing in the world (Which I suppose stemmed from the constant teasing in my childhood and significance my mother placed on social acceptance) I would still make terrible first impressions. Yet, I also did something rather peculiar. I would observe how specific people interacted, and after a while I could (in a way) mimic the way these people behaved and appear to be semi-social. Now that I am nearly 20 I have observed enough interactions to be social, I simply decide not to since it is so exhausting.

Hopefully that sort of made sense. :blushed:
 
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top