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· Maid of Time
549 sx/sp
15,113 Posts
Your post sounds a lot like something my INFJ daughter would have written a year or two ago (she's 15 now). And my INTP kid voiced some similar concerns, although he didn't seem to get so mentally invested with it and kind of went with the flow even if he did not like it.

A lot of this stuff unfortunately just is what it is. And yes, you spend a lot of time in school that you'd rather not, doing things that other people have set out for you. I think as a fellow INxx who went through some feelings like this when I was in school, I think it helps to remember that (1) it seems like a long time to you now, but in four more years you'll be out of school doing your thing, it actually passes quickly in hindsight, (2) the experience of dealing with it will equip you to deal with life later, and (3) you are free in your mind and in your free time to explore whatever you want and do your own thing regardless of what you need to do to school to prep for the work force or for collegiate education.

Things get more complicated when you're older in some ways -- you do have more power, but you are also more stuck and have more obligations. I miss the days of middle and high school when any time after school was over and over the summers I was completely free to do what I liked. But from now until the end of my life, I have obligations to people, to my employer, and to the people I owe money to in order to have the basic necessities of life. I would make the most of what you can right now, when you have a chance.

At least you can come here and voice what you're feeling. It must feel good to know there are people who hear you and can empathize.
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