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Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
INTP women (and men, if that's your thing), what would be your ideal man be like?
  • What characteristics would he have?
  • Forget about personality types where you can, describe the attributes he'd have.
  • Are there differences between who you'd like to be attracted to and who you are attracted to?
  • Who do you think you're good for, and who do you think is good for you?

Mr. Impossible entries are okay.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 · (Edited)
Omigosh Ista, you’re so bad, well if you insist.

I'm holding out for a hero. He's gotta be strong, and he's gotta be fast, and he's gotta be fresh from the fight.
Gotta be funny. ;)

 

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INTP women (and men, if that's your thing), what would be your ideal man be like?
  • What characteristics would he have?
  • Forget about personality types where you can, describe the attributes he'd have.
  • Are there differences between who you'd like to be attracted to and who you are attracted to?
  • Who do you think you're good for, and who do you think is good for you?
1. Funny, smart, more social than I am, understands me (to an extent, like he'd leave me alone if I needed to be alone), witty, calm, happier than I usually am, not athletic but fit, has skinny legs (meow... Me and my attraction to skinny legs...), fun-loving, nonjudgemental, intellectual,
2. Flexible, adaptable, umm... I'm not sure...
3. Who I'd like to be attracted to? What an odd question...
Umm, I don't think so? Why would I necessarily want to be attrated to any particular person?
4. I'd probably be good for someone who works too hard. I'm the laziest person alive, I'm sure a little bit would rub off on them. XD
Someone who is good for me would be more social than I am.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 · (Edited)
Rock Solid, but Still Functionally Evolving
He'd be rock solid to deal with me (apparently I tend to hurt the sensitive ones, but unintentionally) and capable of not only original thought, but a constant evolution of behavior and lifestyle based on that. Subtle testing would be required to find out if he was rock solid or not.

Diverse Observational Skill, Original Thought, Implemented
Where original thought is not found, I get a little bored of rehashed thoughts and activities, end up feeling like I was sold on marketing and bought into an object instead of a person. That makes me feel unethical. I have little patience for a lack of commitment to reach resolution.

Emotional problems quickly become boring. His capacity for the practical implementation of original thought in resolving issues, trying different things and efficiently building models of what does and doesn't work would be a godsend. The ability to translate "This is important to me" into "If we don't incorporate this somehow, quickly, it's going to lead to issues" is essential.

Thinker, also Passionate and Motivated, Mostly
One guy (EF) thought I was "violent" which was pretty funny. I think that was based on the degree of passion I used in trying to escape his methods, which I'd already told him on numerous occasions, weren't for me. :) I've asked about this purported violence to other guys who have known me well, and they've laughed.

Fundamentally Secure
Generally F's find my physical or emotional style too harsh. I would say that I'd undoubtedly need a thinker, but someone who can be in touch with a passionate, motivated, determined side as well. That would be something I'd need to share with the ideal man. He'd probably need to be larger than me physically and fundamentally secure in himself (which certainly doesn't exclude also being humble).

*enter Mr. Impossible, stage left*
 
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Unpredictable, funny and an unsuppressed sexual appetite. As long as he has genuine feelings for me, that's all that matters.
 

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I know you said to leave type out (but you mentioned it anyway so that's my excuse :tongue:) but I think there is almost something physical about the functions...a vibe, an energy you can sense...and find attractive.

Fe, Ni, Se, and Ti (that combination) are really hot on dudes. Just sayin'. (As I've said quite a few times on this forum...especially ENFJ's :tongue:) Though some INFJ's can look kind of scary... :unsure:

Really just accepting (as in truly accepting and loving, not just sort of putting up with) my INTP-ness would at first leave me in disbelief but would then pretty much have sold me for life. A lot of my life has really been spent "pretending", putting on masks instead of having a real identity (part of my 3-ness?). I actually enjoy that in a way, in some ways it makes my life more fun and liberating to not have to be tied to any "true self" (sometimes I almost end up valuing the presentation more my real self, almost to the point that I don't think of myself as having a "real self") but it does make true intimacy harder to attain. Which is a shame, cause I really do want that. A part of me is sort of afraid of people knowing the "real me". Anyone who I give that trust to and doesn't fail it has passed one of the hardest and important tests in my book.
 

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Rock Solid, but Still Functionally Evolving
He'd be rock solid to deal with me (apparently I tend to hurt the sensitive ones, but unintentionally) and capable of not only original thought, but a constant evolution of behavior and lifestyle based on that. Subtle testing would be required to find out if he was rock solid or not.

Diverse Observational Skill, Original Thought, Implemented
Where original thought is not found, I get a little bored of rehashed thoughts and activities, end up feeling like I was sold on marketing and bought into an object instead of a person. That makes me feel unethical. I have little patience for a lack of commitment to reach resolution.

Emotional problems quickly become boring. His capacity for the practical implementation of original thought in resolving issues, trying different things and efficiently building models of what does and doesn't work would be a godsend. The ability to translate "This is important to me" into "If we don't incorporate this somehow, quickly, it's going to lead to issues" is essential.

Thinker, also Passionate and Motivated, Mostly
One guy (EF) thought I was "violent" which was pretty funny. I think that was based on the degree of passion I used in trying to escape his methods, which I'd already told him on numerous occasions, weren't for me. :) I've asked about this purported violence to other guys who have known me well, and they've laughed.

Fundamentally Secure
Generally F's find my physical or emotional style too harsh. I would say that I'd undoubtedly need a thinker, but someone who can be in touch with a passionate, motivated, determined side as well. That would be something I'd need to share with the ideal man. He'd probably need to be larger than me physically and fundamentally secure in himself (which certainly doesn't exclude also being humble).

*enter Mr. Impossible, stage left*
When do you stick the needles?
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
I know you said to leave type out (but you mentioned it anyway so that's my excuse :tongue:) but I think there is almost something physical about the functions...a vibe, an energy you can sense...and find attractive.

Fe, Ni, Se, and Ti (that combination) are really hot on dudes. Just sayin'. (As I've said quite a few times on this forum...especially ENFJ's :tongue:) Though some INFJ's can look kind of scary... :unsure:

Really just accepting (as in truly accepting and loving, not just sort of putting up with) my INTP-ness would at first leave me in disbelief but would then pretty much have sold me for life. A lot of my life has really been spent "pretending", putting on masks instead of having a real identity (part of my 3-ness?). I actually enjoy that in a way, in some ways it makes my life more fun and liberating to not have to be tied to any "true self" (sometimes I almost end up valuing the presentation more my real self, almost to the point that I don't think of myself as having a "real self") but it does make true intimacy harder to attain. Which is a shame, cause I really do want that. A part of me is sort of afraid of people knowing the "real me". Anyone who I give that trust to and doesn't fail it has passed one of the hardest and important tests in my book.
Well - I said... "if you can leave it out" (personality types) which I couldn't. ;) I'm interested in what an ENFJ is. I think that was my first "love." Pretty amazing to be around, but not sure we connected on an energetic level. That came up as a personality type that I'm attracted to in a recent test.

You're still young, but I've got a feeling you'll be surprised what you experience in your future. You seem well developed and centered. Know what you mean about someone being able to deal with you though.
 
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I am not very particular about characteristics of a man, but the one requirement I do have is one that has never been met. I want a man with compassion, and ridiculous amounts of it. I care very deeply about every living thing and do my best to respect them, and I look for a person who does the same. Also, I value honesty and loyalty. So, I ask three things... be compassionate, be honest, and be loyal. Though it seems that asking those is asking far too much.
 

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So, I ask three things... be compassionate, be honest, and be loyal. Though it seems that asking those is asking far too much.
Don't give up; I've managed to be in two relationships where the guys had all three of those in spades (one I had to "let go," and one I'm hoping to keep), so I promise you they do exist!
 

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