[Enneagram Type 4] 4's: what enneagram types are you attracted to? (with wings!)

4's: what enneagram types are you attracted to? (with wings!)

View Poll Results: 4's: what enneagram types are you attracted to?

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  • 1w9

    5 9.62%
  • 1w2

    4 7.69%
  • 2w1

    8 15.38%
  • 2w3

    8 15.38%
  • 3w2

    2 3.85%
  • 3w4

    5 9.62%
  • 4w3

    13 25.00%
  • 4w5

    16 30.77%
  • 5w4

    21 40.38%
  • 5w6

    11 21.15%
  • 6w5 (phobic)

    5 9.62%
  • 6w5 (counterphobic)

    10 19.23%
  • 6w7 (phobic)

    5 9.62%
  • 6w7 (counterphobic)

    11 21.15%
  • 7w6

    16 30.77%
  • 7w8

    10 19.23%
  • 8w7

    16 30.77%
  • 8w9

    17 32.69%
  • 9w8

    12 23.08%
  • 9w1

    15 28.85%
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This is a discussion on 4's: what enneagram types are you attracted to? (with wings!) within the Type 4 Forum - The Individualist forums, part of the Heart Triad - Types 2,3,4 category; I'm really curious about what enneagram types 4's find attractive. I'm talking average-level individuals of each type and wing... I ...

  1. #1

    4's: what enneagram types are you attracted to? (with wings!)

    I'm really curious about what enneagram types 4's find attractive. I'm talking average-level individuals of each type and wing... I know the wings add a big difference to different types, and I know, with some types, I'm attracted to one wing but not the other.

    I wonder if a pattern emerges. Many of us are romantics; some even have a "rescuer" mentality, and I wonder if that reflects in the numbers... if we're prone toward types which are generally more extraverted or not. We crave acceptance, so I wonder if the types described as more open-minded types will get representation. However, some sx 4's like stormy, tempestuous romances, so who knows what we'll get. :D
    emerald sea thanked this post.



  2. #2
    Type 5w4


    I've reached the conclusion my attractions are not enneatype-specific. It all depends on the person, not their type.

  3. #3
    Type 4w5

    For some reason I find 6w7's (both phobic and counterphobic) especially attractive. Then, it's more of an issue of the types I find unattractive. There are a few I find repulsive. Other than that, I don't find type to be all that big of a factor when it comes to whose personality I find attractive or not. Instinct variant plays are much bigger part for me. I'm especially attracted to Sx/Sp's and Sp/So's (though the former is a much better match for me than the latter).
    Chas23 and Entropic thanked this post.

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  5. #4

    For some reason I find 6w7's (both phobic and counterphobic) especially attractive.
    Um, that is the strangest thing I have ever heard. 6w7's contradictions drives me insane sometimes. I prefer someone who is firm, intellectual and rational.

  6. #5
    Type 4w5

    Quote Originally Posted by doublexuan View Post
    Um, that is the strangest thing I have ever heard. 6w7's contradictions drives me insane sometimes. I prefer someone who is firm, intellectual and rational.
    I want to be the firm, intellectual, and rational one for them.

  7. #6

    "Firm" isn't really something I like. I'm an sp 4w5 who dated an sx 8w7, and let me tell ya... we could have had our own soap opera. The relationship was a huge power struggle, and he had quite the nasty temper. Controlling, clingy, and manipulative. Love/hate duality. Not my thing. I also dated an 8-ish sx 5w6, and even that was too much for me.

    I want to try someone more low-key and peaceful, for a change. I really want to date a nine, but I don't know too many of them. Sevens would also be awesome. Sixes that can acknowledge my need for space. Something like that. :D
    Choice thanked this post.

  8. #7
    Type 4w3

    My first serious relationship (2 years long) was with a 9w8. My next (and most recent) serious relationship (1.5 years) was with a 9w1. Both ended horribly and in a cascade of terrible, bitter flame.

    *swears off nines forever*

    I love them, but man, working out problems with them just DOES NOT WORK for me.

    So... no more being attracted to nines.

    In theory I could see myself being attracted to fives, sixes, sevens, eights.
    Choice and Curiously thanked this post.

  9. #8
    Type 4w5

    Quote Originally Posted by viva View Post
    My first serious relationship (2 years long) was with a 9w8. My next (and most recent) serious relationship (1.5 years) was with a 9w1. Both ended horribly and in a cascade of terrible, bitter flame.

    *swears off nines forever*

    I love them, but man, working out problems with them just DOES NOT WORK for me.

    So... no more being attracted to nines.

    In theory I could see myself being attracted to fives, sixes, sevens, eights.
    I'm sorry to hear this. You aren't alone. I definitely understand. I've had this experience with 5's (who also had 9 in them actually) and 9's as well. This most recently happened last week. I won't swear them off forever, but I will be more careful in the future. 5's so far in my life seem pretty good at shutting people out and 9's at shutting down at the first sign of conflct or something uncomfortable (which seems to be a lot of things). :/ I wish you better luck in the future!
    Curiously and viva thanked this post.

  10. #9

    yikes... at least with the 8w7 we would talk about the conflict... even if we were yelling and screaming and being all melodramatic. sorry to hear that :(

  11. #10
    Type 5w4


    I like my love interest to be fun, pleasant, reliable, energetic, spontaneous, kind, loving, passionate about their interests and have magnetic chemistry with me and be attractive. It may sound superficial but looks matter a lot to me. I don't mean the person is the typical hot dude, but someone I can look at over and over and still be stunned by their looks and feel lucky. I like my partner to feel the same way about me so I make a point of staying attractive too. (And I just feel better about myself if I look good and take care of myself.)


     
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