Help! Navigating marriage between a 4 and a 3
My husband and I have been married 15 years. He is a 4 and I am a 3 (we just recently discovered enneagram). I have read that 3's tend to be more self-aware, and I was-- when I read my description I thought, "Oh, that explains a lot." My husband was less so, and seems to have fallen into a deep dark hole since discovering more about himself. He has gone into that stress 2 direction where he needs me emotionally engaged all the time, and I am exhausted. I think my wing is a 2, so I am trying to "succeed in helping him feel better" and move through this, it's pretty task-focused. He wants to sit in these feelings and wants me there too. I do want him to be himself and not to feel stifled, but I also want to be free to be myself and not be tied to him all the time. Of course as a 3 I'm looking for practical, executable strategies! Haha :) But I'm also wondering... is this a phase for him? He's never been like this before. Could he be depressed, or having a mid-life crisis, or is this just my new normal?