[Enneagram Type 6] What's your love language?

What's your love language?

View Poll Results: Love Language

26. You may not vote on this poll
  • Words of Affirmation

    6 23.08%
  • Quality Time

    14 53.85%
  • Receiving Gifts

    1 3.85%
  • Acts of Service

    6 23.08%
  • Physical Touch

    16 61.54%
Multiple Choice Poll.
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This is a discussion on What's your love language? within the Type 6 Forum - The Loyalist forums, part of the Head Triad - Types 5,6,7 category; What's your main love language? Just wanted to see if there was a common thread among my fellow sixes. Mine ...

  1. #1

    What's your love language?

    What's your main love language? Just wanted to see if there was a common thread among my fellow sixes. Mine would be words of affirmation followed by physical touch.
    mushr00m, user87 and psyche thanked this post.

  2. #2
    Type 6

    Love is such a big thing for myself. I love falling in love and just the general idea. I like untraditional forms of love and the sensual aspect of it. Its alot about certain things that I notice about them that go unnoticed by others, I used to fall for some quite certain kinds of guys that often have an air of femininity about them, a gentleness of spirit, true kindness and affection. And yeah, physical touch, glances, a deep emotional sexual relationship and other things like our personal qualities and how they complement each other, I don't buy into one person wearing the trousers in a relationship - its not about control but being complimentary to each other. I quite like the thrill of the chase too but getting settled with them is so very nice aswell although its usually in the initial stages of relationships, there's usually some friction between feeling trapped that this is it, im making a big commitment now or at least thats how it feels and that can be frustrating or confusing for them and I worry that they may think I am being fickle or shallow but its just that I take the idea of committing to a relationship seriously because once im in, im in and its hard to get myself out of a relationship when I have had feelings for this person.
    I hope that answers your question. :)

  3. #3
    Type 6w7

    I don't think words of affirmation mean much to me. God knows I like hearing them, but their effect tends to be fleeting as I am inclined not to trust them. Yeh, I guess I need more than just words.

    * Quality time is the simplest way to feel loved, and therefore the most powerful.

    Receiving gifts, particularly unexpected, meaningful ones, is super nice but not needed.

    ** Acts are service are golden. Actions speak louder than words, and it shows people are willing to put in the effort for you.

    Physical touch... hmm. Nice but not needed. I guess.

    I am kind of a afraid of intimacy, so I never really thought about this very in-depth before.
    Arya, Vivid Melody, Havok and 1 others thanked this post.

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  5. #4
    Type 6

    Took the test and got Physical Touch. If you were to ask me blindly, though, I'd say Physical Touch, Quality Time, and Words of Affirmation. Still not sure what order they'd come in, though...
    mushr00m, Vivid Melody and psyche thanked this post.

  6. #5
    Type 6w7

    I'd say my preference goes:

    1. Quality Time - Quality time is not sitting in front of the TV. It involves interacting with each other. I really enjoy spending time doing something with friends or family.

    2. Acts of Service - As long as it's not pushy, I appreciate this because I think actions speak louder than words. I'm very sensitive to this going "too far," since I value my independence. However, I do need help and helping shows concern, given it's not intrusive.

    3. Physical Touch - I enjoy cuddling and such, it makes me feel warm inside xD I think I could handle a long-distance relationship fairly easily, though, as long as there were plans to meet up regularly, even if it was every 6 months or whatever.

    4. Words of Affirmation - I want words to mean things, but I find they don't most of the time. They're nice to hear, but ultimately pointless if actions don't back them up. Additionally, I prefer letters over pre-made cards.

    5. Receiving Gifts - Some people have this idea that flowers or jewelry make everything better. No. An unexpected gift is lovely, and I do appreciate them at times, but don't expect it to solve anything. I'm that person who is cautious about spending money and doesn't really ask for anything, so knowing me well enough to pick a gift I'd like is hard.
    goastfarmer, FreeBeer, psyche and 2 others thanked this post.

  7. #6
    Type 9w1

    Hm, doing them in order seems fun, guess I'll do that too heh.

    1. Physical touch - Not many people would believe me if I told them so, but yes, this is mine by a landslide. I feel weirdly uncomfortable elaborating; I've had some bad experiences, basically.

    2. Acts of service - This is nice. I get tired of doing everything myself, and guys like to do that kind of thing, at least in my experience... You know, they're problem solvers. So it would make me feel loved if they took the time to do that, I guess.

    3. Words of affirmation - This is almost tied with the second one, I think... When the person really means what they are saying, it feels great. Again, I've had bad experiences when it comes to words, so when I get a genuine compliment or reassurance it's really nice.

    4. Quality time - It's nice to just be with someone having a conversation or going somewhere together or whatever, this is nice, at least when you have the other person's genuine attention and such.

    5. Receiving gifts - This could be nice sometimes, like "I picked you this flower on my way home, it just made me think of you", but too much of this might overwhelm me.
    Vivid Melody thanked this post.

  8. #7

    Quality time is the most important one for me. It's the one that makes me feel loved and valued, because it shows me that the person loves me enough to want to spend time with me.

    Physical touch is also something I like very much, and would be an important part of a relationship for me, although only with people I'm close to. I'm ok with hugs from friends, but with people I don't know very well I'm very sensitive about my personal space. I don't like random people getting very tactile or sitting very close to me. Maybe that's part of the reason I like it though, being comfortable enough to touch is a sign that we're close. A touch or a hug from the right person at the right time means a lot to me.

    Acts of service: basically what @Paradigm said.

    Words of affirmation I find meaningless most of the time, and I find it hard to take a compliment. If someone tells me something specific they like about me, that will mean more to me than "you're a nice person" or something.

    Gifts don't usually mean much to me at all. I'm just about the least materialistic person I know, I never know what I want and I'd be quite happy going through a relationship without ever getting flowers. If someone wants to spend money on me I'd usually rather they took me out for a meal or spent it on some other kind of experience for me rather than buying me something tangible.
    Vivid Melody thanked this post.

  9. #8

    Mine is quality time, followed by physical touch. I need to spend time with someone to feel loved by them.
    Vivid Melody thanked this post.

  10. #9
    Type 4w5

    My order seems a bit different than everyone else's so far. In fact, it's basically the complete opposite. Something like this:

    1. Words of affirmation - Yes, yes, actions speak louder than words, but I understand words a lot better. I express affection best by using written or verbal communication and I appreciate it immensely in return. Part of it is probably because I don't always interpret other signs so well and words are pretty straightforward. Also, I just love good poetry :)

    2. Receiving gifts - I swear I'm not that materialistic! I genuinely love giving and receiving gifts. They don't have to be flashy, just thoughtful. One of my favorite gifts ever was a tea kettle my mom got me when I got back from England. I don't think I even mentioned that I started liking tea, but somehow she just knew and even though it was cheap and simple, I love the hell out of it. I keep a list of things people mention they like or want so I have something to get for them at all times and if I ever won a lot of money the first thing I'd do is buy stuff for my loved ones.

    3. Physical touch - I haven't had a lot of experience with touch in romantic relationships, but I think it's wonderful. It's so concrete and comforting feeling the warmth of another human being. I tend to be very polite and respect peoples' personal space, but I secretly love when I ride the bus and am forced to sit close to strangers (as long as they don't smell of course). I'm also fairly awkward, but there's nothing better than hugs or holding hands or nuzzling with someone.

    4. Quality time - Of course you have to hang out with someone to show them you love them, but just being together isn't high on my list. Part of that might be because it's so important to my mom and it always felt smothering somehow, her insisting that we had to spend pre-determined time together doing specific activities (especially board games). I do love dinner parties with groups of friends and stuff, it's just that intimate gatherings can be draining and it's not a way that I communicate love per se.

    5. Acts of service - Not sure why, but these make me a bit uncomfortable, especially if done on a grand scale. They sort of contrived when I do them. Of course, I always appreciate people doing things for me and I try to do things to keep others happy, but this is not my forte.
    Vivid Melody thanked this post.

  11. #10
    Type 6w7

    Quality Time (best thing ever ;) ) > Physical Touch (I love this) > Acts of service (I'd rather do somethng for someone or have them do something for me then gifts or words)

    Words of Affirmation - ah..talk is cheap and embarassing ._. i don't often use it and idk how to respond to it either , so I don't put much weight on this.
    Receiving gifts - gifts are often hit and miss and I really dislike it when someone makes a gift in BAD taste...which I'm forced to like and use...ugh.
    Vivid Melody thanked this post.

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