[Enneagram Type 9] Nine searching for their wing

Nine searching for their wing

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  • 1 Post By Heavy

This is a discussion on Nine searching for their wing within the Type 9 Forum - The Peacemaker forums, part of the Body Triad - Types 8,9,1 category; Hello fellow nines! So, I've determined I'm very much a 9. I'm easygoing, conflict avoidant, see both sides of view. ...

  1. #1

    Nine searching for their wing

    Hello fellow nines! So, I've determined I'm very much a 9. I'm easygoing, conflict avoidant, see both sides of view. But I'm not quite sure about the wing! So here's my reasoning for each:

    Why I could be 9w8:

    -I usually don't lead as I'm an introvert, but when I'm passionate about something, I enjoy taking charge

    -I enjoy some conflicts? Well, I don't like real fighting, but for example, I enjoy a good debate, challenging ideas. I'm not gonna do this with some random person though. Also, I just enjoy a good challenge in general, like when playing strategy games. Might be the 3 link, but I have a secret competitive streak. I like pulling pranks too, I resonate with that goofball description of them. I mostly back down in conflict, but I enjoy a good roast at times.

    -I am not very organized, and apparently those with one wings are more organized

    -Being controlled is very, very irksome. I have my clingy moments, but I enjoy being independent and innovative

    -I'm generous! I know this is a 9 thing in general, but apparently it's an 8 thing too. I just like helping out.

    -I root for/protect the underdog

    -I don't care a ton about rules. Like, I'm not going to go out and break them a ton, I don't want to start trouble. But if they don't hurt anyone, I don't care if other people break them, and I may too, more often bend them though.

    -Could be just a body thing, but I get restless a lot, and 9w8s are said to be the more energetic nines

    Why I could be 9w1:

    -I feel guilty very easily, whether that's failure, hurting others, being irresponsible, that stuff

    -1 wings are said to hold grudges. This is kinda true? Well, I forgive super easily, but I dwell on things a lot.

    -I fear being incompetent too ahhhh

    -Despite being a disorganized mess, I find myself fretting over small details

    -Might be cause I'm INFP, but I relate to that cerebral, creative, having a little fantasy world description of 9w1s. I do have this little idealized fantasy world, I love to learn all about sorts of things, and I'm pretty artsy.

    My relationship with anger would probably be useful. I'm surprisingly angry, it's generally out of annoyance though. I become a little ball of rage and pace around angrily, putting on angry music, but I rarely blow up at anyone. If I do, I'll mostly shout "No!" or something. Things besides annoyance that make me angry are people being controlling, judgemental and obnoxious. I don't like admitting to people I'm angry at them, but don't mind talking about anger in general.

    Other things about me that I'm not sure what category to place in:

    -I try to make sure people are treated fairly/everyone's needs are met

    -I could learn to take critcism better, ahahaha

    -In reaction to other peoples' conflicts, I at times find them juicy and funny. But also, I have this tendency to imagine myself in the other person's conflict? Yeah, that makes me sad

    Soo, what do you think? I've been called earthy like an 9w8 too.

  2. #2
    Type 9

    Maybe you consider having both wings, as I do for myself. From what I`ve read, Nines with both wings are considered to frequently oscillate between good child /bad child behaviour. It`s said to be a rare thing to have both wings, but who does really know anyway? I also somewhere heard of the theory (don`t know the source anymore) that wings can fluctuate and change throughout one`s life course and given certain circumstances or situations. To me personally, that sounded quite plausible, just by watching myself and other people.
    From what you wrote here about yourself, I could not cleary decide one wing over the other for you as well .
    I relate to some of what you wrote, and I`m an Infp as well.
    To give you a bit of a more concrete advise, I would recommend reading the descriptions and especially the core drives and fears of 1s and 8s, comparing them, and seeing what fits more for you, or if you relate more or less to both of them to the same extent( -> both wings)

  3. #3

    Pre-Bliss-Stream, nines regularly overestimated their biwingualness....I suppose its better than 9w8s overidentifying with their 8 wing to the point of mistyping as 8s.
    Last edited by Heavy; 07-05-2019 at 08:00 AM.
    Merkurin thanked this post.


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