I currently type as a core 4w5 with a 6w7 fix but I am having trouble deciding if I am an E1, E8 or an E9 with balanced wings...
What age range are you in? - I am 20
Any disorders or conditions we should know about? - I have depression and GAD.
1. What do you think your life is about? What drives you in life? This can be something like a goal or a purpose, or anything else that comes to mind. - A fulfilling life is doing something that is bigger than yourself. If you have nothing but selfish desire you do not have much at all. You should be following your heart and using your gifts to create something good in the world.
2. What were you like as a kid? - Eccentric, outgoing, brash, impulsive.
3. Describe your relationship with your parents. Does anything stand out about the way you interacted? - I don't have the best relationship with my parents. Growing up I didn't feel I could really trust them to help me through my problems and to a degree I still don't. They usually find some way to consider me manipulative or something, so it ends up being more hurtful. I've looked for a support system elsewhere, if I get one at all. I do love my mother though, I try to care for her as she has a lot of mental health issues that make her distant. My grandfather and brother are just asinine and argumentative.
4. What values are important to you? What do you hope to avoid doing or being? - Honesty, compassion are very important to me. If you are honest and you care how your actions affect people, we'll probably be okay. I try to avoid being selfish/over-indulgent.
5. Aside from phobias, are there any fears that characterized your childhood? Have they continued into the present day, or not, and if not, how have you dealt with them? - Much of my younger years were surrounded by a fear of being alone, but after I faced being completely alone it wasn't as frightening. I realized I am capable of caring for myself. Another is an intense fear of failure, which plagues me even now. It causes me a lot of self-doubt and inhibits my life to a degree.
6. a.) How do you see yourself? - Not very positively. I am a flawed person and I'm fairly dull.
b.) How do you want others to see you? - I hope they see me as someone they can come to in times of need. Someone who is honest and stands by their convictions. Someone with drive.
c.) What do you dislike the most in other people? - Laziness, insensitivity, wishy/washy types that tell you what you want to hear rather than the truth.
7. Which habit do you most automatically act on? Rank the following habits from most to least automatic, on a scale of 1 (most) to 3 (least).
a.) Work for personal gain with more concern for self than for others. - 2
b.) Strive for a sense of tranquility in yourself and the world around you - 3
c.) Decide what is right for the betterment of something or someone else. - 1
8. Where does the wandering mind take you? What provokes this? - I usually get imaginative and live in my own world. I think it is easier to be separate from reality. Reality just kind of...scares me to a degree. All the possibilities of what could go wrong. Living in a mental bubble is kind of a coping mechanism.
9.What makes you feel your best? What makes you feel your worst? - Helping those in need, following my heart, having goals, music and exercise, these make me feel my best. My worst is usually exam time because test anxiety, fears of failure, etc. and being pushed aside by people. I face a lot of rejection and hurt coming from society and I feel like I am outcasted from it. Like I am outside looking in.
10. Let's talk about emotions. Explain what might make you feel the following, how they feel to you or how you react to the emotion:
a.) anger - I get angry pretty easily tbh. What you did depends on how quickly this subsides. Usually I get angry about insensitive/insulting jokes, mistreatment of people, bullying, people obsessed with money so much they enter some profession that needs a compassionate individual and all they can say is how little they get paid, people who just tune you out when they ask for your opinion, arrogance.
b.) shame - I think...I am kinda ashamed of how rash my feelings are for one. I can be insensitive myself to a lot of things merely because I find it insensitive they did it. if you push me I can be a real bitch. I'm ashamed of my anger because anger is so ugly... I am ashamed of being easy to manipulate. It is so easy to draw me in and abuse me. It isn't a good feeling...
c.) anxiety - the possibility of failure. ideas of death. in general I can find you about every worst case scenario for a situation. it makes it hard to be positive.
11. Describe how you respond to the following:
a.) stress - exercise, or avoidance. I try to escape.
b.) negative unexpected change - I try to regroup. You have to be willing to take the curveballs thrown your way.
c.) conflict - more conflict. if you start a fight with me you'll wish you didn't.
12. a.) What kind of role are you naturally inclined to take in a group? Why? - If I am pushed into a group I become one of two things... in a friendship group I am usually a quiet mediator who tosses a comment here and there. In a work group I take a leadership role. I prefer to be in control of the situation.
b.) If put in power, how do you behave? Why? - I to a degree can be overbearing. I don't trust people to do what they should so I rather do the whole thing myself and act independently than rely on someone else. so I take the leadership roles if I can. I don't hesitate.
c.) Do you tend to struggle with others who have authority over you? Why? - Not really. My teachers have their position because they worked their asses off and did a lot. I am less than them at that point. I have more issues with people on my level.
13. What do you see or notice in others that most people don't? - Manipulative acts. Mainly because I've been manipulated quite a bit so I know what it looks like.
14. Comment on your relationship with trust. - I don't even trust my own gut usually what's your point? :P
15. Briefly: What religious and/or political beliefs do you have? Do you think they influenced your responses in this questionnaire? - I am a Christian. I think to a degree it does affect how I view certain things I feel. I am a centrist politically, I do not feel this affected it.
Optional Question (due to personal nature)
Discuss an event that has impacted your life significantly; more importantly, how you responded to it. - I was in an emotionally abusive relationship which negatively affected how I handle people socially. I tend to think the worst of things now. Plus a lot of social rejection left me kinda being a hermit.
Which of the following temptations do you find yourself acting upon the most? (And briefly state why)
- To constantly push yourself to be “the best” - I feel like to be successful you have to prove yourself...
- To be without needs, well-intentioned
- To replace direct experience with concepts
- To have an extreme sense of personal moral obligation - You need to know what is right and wrong and you are a seed, so you have to be the change you want to see in the world.
- To think that fulfillment is somewhere else
- To cyclically become indecisive and seek others for reassurance - I have a lot of doubt and anxiety so sometimes when I am making big decisions I feel a need to seek outer reference.
- To overuse imagination in searching for yourself - Reality is a harsh place.
- To avoid conflicts and asserting yourself
- To consider yourself entirely self-sufficient - If I am self-sufficient I don't have to rely on things I don't trust.
What's something you are: a.) thankful you have b.) wish you could have? Why? - I am thankful I have great friends online, because otherwise I'd be pretty lonely. I am thankful for them being a good support system. I wish I could have trust in myself, so I could be stronger... I don't want people to notice this vulnerability at all...