Am I an Enneagram 4 so or Enneagram 9 sx? A sexual 7 or Self-pres 2?

Am I an Enneagram 4 so or Enneagram 9 sx? A sexual 7 or Self-pres 2?

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This is a discussion on Am I an Enneagram 4 so or Enneagram 9 sx? A sexual 7 or Self-pres 2? within the What's my Enneagram type? forums, part of the Enneagram Personality Theory Forum category; Hi! Can anyone help me distinguish my enneagram type? My mind always jump from questions to questions everytime I try ...

  1. #1

    Hi! Can anyone help me distinguish my enneagram type? My mind always jump from questions to questions everytime I try to learn about my core fix and instinctual variants. A possibility that I might be a particular type excites me, and then only seconds ago my brain will overthink things from type to type over again. I'm quite indecisive and has difficulty settling with a type.

    Ironically, it's more easier for me to type other people than learning what is mine. It's distressing. The reason why I typed myself as a 9 is because I have little grit to fight back, and that makes me prone to bullying. I fear conflict to be honest. I consider 4 because I feel like something is missing inside me; my longingness alienates me from the real world. I can relate a bit with sexual 7 in terms of being idealistic, funny, goofy, or loud. And enneagram 2 self-pres when I am willing to sacrifice and lose my self-worth for the sake of helping out and be in service, for it's really hard for me to say no.

    Can anyone help me figure out my enneagram type? I want to understand and find my strong sense of self that seems to be missing. 😞
    Last edited by GirlInLove; 08-03-2019 at 03:52 PM.



  2. #2

    If it's true that 9s often have a hard time deciding which type fits best, could that be a clue?

  3. #3

    Quote Originally Posted by 4w5alive View Post
    If it's true that 9s often have a hard time deciding which type fits best, could that be a clue?
    Is my tendency to overthink be a sign that I could be a 4? 😅

  4. #4

    Some kinds of overthinking may be more associated with type 5, or with introverts generally.

    As a type 4 I've felt different from other people for a long time, in ways both positive and negative. You too?

    If you've tried some tests, do they seem to agree? I started at trueself.io ... two or three others also scored me highest on 4.

  5. #5

    Quote Originally Posted by 4w5alive View Post
    Some kinds of overthinking may be more associated with type 5, or with introverts generally.

    As a type 4 I've felt different from other people for a long time, in ways both positive and negative. You too?

    If you've tried some tests, do they seem to agree? I started at trueself.io ... two or three others also scored me highest on 4.
    When I took some test, I was constantly scored high on 9 and then 4. I was even typed as a social 7 just recently. But I don't trust any of the tests that keep lurking in the internet world, so I am taking those results with a grain of salt.

    I relate to four, especially to social 4, that I got inferiority issues. I tend to compare myself with others who, I think, are getting what I've been wanting to. I suffer in comparison, I envy the happiness of others, I hate it when that person can do better with the same thing we share. They write well, draw better... I hate it when someone achieve the things I wanted to. They make me feel less of me.

    Yet on the other side is that I can be funny and goofy who jokes around and make people laugh like a 7 or just a typical social variant. Perhaps, you have some useful questions that might help me clarify things. 😁

    Thank you for responding anyway! I wonder what MBTI type are you.

  6. #6

    Nines and Fours have a lot of similarities so I can see the fogginess there. Both are withdrawing numbers. Both have introspective qualities that shape their social interactions. Nines/Fours can both seem like Sevens because Nines are affable/accommodating (people like them) and Fours can be full of life and passion (like Sevens).

    One helpful question might be, does your imaginative storytelling always end with happy endings or is there some tragedy involved?
    Sevens generally reframe sadness/struggle into happiness and hope in their imaginations. Sevens also exaggerate a lot.
    Nines prefer happy endings usually. Nines can see things from others perspective very easily so can understand those who struggle, but if Nines are deciding then they tend to choose the easier/happier imagination.

    Fours are able to sit with sadness and not have to fix it. Fours can see beauty in the tragic. So if you ever feel like sadness touches a sweet spot, that's definitely not a Seven quality and definitely is a Four quality.


    Another thing you mentioned is grit to fight back. Nines tend to 'fight back' in the sense that they are immovable when they don't want to do something. They are like elephants sitting down and very difficult to move. And when the straw that breaks the camel's back does happen, people tend to be surprised at Nine's anger because they seem so accommodating otherwise. Fours tend to have introjection, they fight with the world because their sense of their own flaws makes them sensitive to the world's flaws. They are jealous, yes, but usually it is not that a Four is mad that the other person has a good quality, but rather they just feel others have found their special thing and the Four is still looking.

    You sound in the ballpark of your number!! So keep up hope. It is hard to discern the nuance. It took me a year to finally be fully convinced of my number. The best way to move forward is to observe yourself for a few weeks, and WHEN you exhibit one of these qualities (likeability, anger, etc.) take a second and try to discern why you are acting that way. Sorry if that feels like what you're already doing; but keep discerning, keep sharing the small insights you come up with, and keep sharing with others who have thought about these things. Enjoy the process! :-) Because when you decide what number you are, that's not the finish line. The self growth keeps going.

  7. #7

    Oh, thank you @Ayeser

    I do have a question, too. If I'm not a core 4, then why I cried so hard by merely listening to Vincent song? What are the reasons why I constantly long for something? Why I always feel like I belong to some mystical other side? I feel euphoria and that feels home to me.

    Why can't I be a 4? No, I'm not forcing myself to be a type I am not. I can be a 9, too. But I'm more emotional and romantic for that core fix.

    I got a lot of Enneagram 9 in my life, they're all unique from each other but they're also similar in terms of being low-key and people-person. While I, in comparison, seen myself as aloof like a 5 but is easily turned on by almost anything. I'm a lot more introspective where people ask me why I am constantly in my head a lot.

    I can be deeply moved by a wide range of emotions but surprisingly can be shallow, fun-loving like 7, too. I wonder why is that? 🤔
    Last edited by GirlInLove; 08-05-2019 at 06:09 AM.


     

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