kelp! stuck between infp and enfp. need help finding myself

kelp! stuck between infp and enfp. need help finding myself

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This is a discussion on kelp! stuck between infp and enfp. need help finding myself within the What's my personality type? forums, part of the Personality Cafe category; Hi friends! Longtime lurker of personalitycafe and would greatly appreciate some insight as to quell the neuroses that is my ...

  1. #1

    kelp! stuck between infp and enfp. need help finding myself

    Hi friends!

    Longtime lurker of personalitycafe and would greatly appreciate some insight as to quell the neuroses that is my mind

    Seriously stuck in the twilight zone of introversion vs extroversion :(
    I've always thought of myself as introvert and infp in particular but have found myself vacillating between two. None of the infp descriptions really fit me (too calm and reserved) and neither do the enfps (too wild and all over the place) - my enneagram being 6w7 certainly does not much to help. anywhoooo here we go

    (i apologize in advance) & thank you!! :)

    1) What aspect of your personality made you unsure of your type?

    Hmmm, well where do I even start...definitely the whole extroverted vs introverted thing. I always thought I was an introvert, but in retrospect that tendency seems more a result of how I grew up more than anything. But being shy for the most part and constantly overthinking things/being apprehensive to new people at times certaintly doesn't help. I'm very outgoing, bubbly, random and hyper when I'm comfortably with people, but otherwise very reserved, introspective and closed off when I'm not, no matter how much I want not be. I know Ne and Fi are my top two functions, but I'm really not sure which is more dominant. I don't really see myself as having as strong a set of values as infps are often supposed to have, there are very few things that i can see myself being martyr for. Not that I don't have any of course, I'm rather politcally active and definitely have a keen sense of right and wrong, but not as stauchly as Fi dom seems to imply. With that being said, I'm also very internally driven emotion wise, like my feelings are regardless of what's happenig in and around me for the most part. Ou! also with the whole introvert vs extrovert thing, I'm the type of person that wouldn't want to go out to a party, especially with people I don't know, but at the end of the night, would be the last one to want to leave. I am energized by social interaction, but when I get home I want to left alone, and I'm especially prickly when I feel my alone time being intruded on. On the point of Si vs Te and the inferior function when I'm under stress, it really depends on what I'm stressed about. Like I overthink think things alot and ruminate on every little detail when it had to do with me making big decissions, are overthinking relationship things (I guess everybody is prone to this) but i also become really stressed about not having my life together and go all inferior Te mad on everybody. Though, in retrospect all those things could be a sign of inferior Te too :/

    also being a 6w7 does not help

    2) What do you yearn for in life? Why?

    I yearn to find myself, as cliche as that sounds. I feel like all my life is me trying to constantly find and self-actualize myself, and I want to experience life and the world to find that. I also yearn to finally find a person that gets me, I guess because I see that as all part of that quest so to speak. In general, I just yearn to be content and happy with myself and to finally have it all figured out. I can't really phrase it any better than that.

    3) Think about a time where you felt like you were at your finest. Tell us what made you feel that way.

    As lame and nerdy as it sounds, I had to write this paper for one of classes on the IMF and World Bank and how corrupt and criminal they are and I was so impassioned and into it and truly loved every moment. I'm sure there have been better moments, but when I'm writing at all, I truly feel at my finest. I don't do it enough unfortunately :/ But I think the particular mix of my values (guess I'm more passionate than I thought :P) coupled with writing and the act of discovery and creation that comes with it was what really did it for me.

    4) What makes you feel inferior?

    Ouu. Not having my life together for one. I constantly feel that my life is stagnating or that I'm not as "on track" as everyone else with theres and one of my greatest fears is that I'll never be. I really have trouble organizing things and foucusing and sometimes feel that as a result I'm stupid. In general I'm very self-concious of my intelligence for that reason, I feel inferior that I don't know enough or am not as smart as other people or just plain incompetent and as a result either withdraw or overcompensate by being really bubbly or sociable. Of course, I now know that none of that is *entirely* true, that's why finding mbti was such a catharic experience for me :)

    5) What tends to weigh on your decisions? (Do you think about people, pro-cons, how you feel about it, etc.)

    Well it deprends on the decisions, but I would say for the most part how I feel. Who am I kidding, definitely how I feel. If I had a dollar for everytime I've made decisions illogically..... with that being said, sometimes I do think about other people, but that has more to do with me having them high on my list of values than anything and is the result of how I feel. So yeah, definitely how I feel. Sometimes pros and cons factor in but they are never the overriding reason for my decisions.

    6) When working on a project what is normally your emphasis? Do you like to have control of the outcome?

    Idk, I guess having it be of my own personal and creative output? So yeah, I do like to have control, almost to the fault. I want it to be reflective of me as a person, even if it doesn't prescribed guidelines. I can also be pretty perfectionist as a result, wanting it to be perfectly reflective of me.

    7) Describe us a time where you had a lot of fun. How is your memory of it?

    Um, when I was out with my friends. I can't recall a specific time that specifically stood out. But a couple weeks ago I was out with my friends and this guy I liked and we were just walking home and talking and being silly and it was nice :). I'm sorry I can't really think of a better example than that :/

    8) When you want to learn something new, what feels more natural for you? (Are you more prone to be hands on, to theorize, to memorize, etc)

    To theorize, definitely to theorize. I feel like I'm to ADD for any other method than just getting lost in my mind. I tried teaching myslef the guitar once and gave up bc I'm lazy and impatient. I don't know how exactly this relates, but there you go. I wanna pick it up and I think actually maybe learning more about it, like music theory and what not would actually really help. I recently took a glass on Jazz (for non-musicians such as myself) and developed a fascination for chord progressions and bars and all that jazz (no pun intended). But in short, thinking about playing the guitar is definitely more my style than actually playing it. It could just be my laziness tho.

    9) How organized do you to think of yourself as?

    LOL. Not at all. Like insofar that my life hasn't totally fallen apart I guess. I'm definitely more organized than I was previously, and I tend to feel less impending senses of doom at the prospect, buttttt other than "enough to stay afloat" I'm pretty haphazard about everything I do.

    10) How do you judge new ideas? You try to understand the principles behind it to see if they make sense or do you look for information that supports it?

    Try to look for information that supports it I guess. Both to an extent, but I'm more inclined to judge it based how it fits it things that I already know, ya know? Like I'd be like ok this makes sense this fits into this random discordant thing I read this one time. Like I once used functions to understand different epistimological ways finding knowledge worked like a charm :D. I don't know if I understood this question right tbh, i mean I guess that technically *could* be understanding principles but idk

    11) You find harmony by making sure everyone is doing fine and belonging to a given group or by making sure that you follow what you believe and being yourself?

    I really like people to get along. So I'm inclined to say the first. Like unless I don't like or care for the person I want them to feel welcomed in a given group. But I don't really see these things as mutual exclusive :/ like I'm not so hospitable as to go out of my way to include people but on the contrary for the most part keep to myself (assuming its a big group w/ strangers and what not), so I don't really understand this question. I'm not sure which is more harmonious, I would say the latter, I definitely do value being myself over making people feel comfortable, but not to point of being abrasive.

    12) Are you the kind that thinks before speaking or do you speak before thinking? Do you prefer one-on-one communication or group discussions?

    This really depends. Is thinking while I'm speaking an option? (haha). I guess speak before thinking. I'm a pretty shy person, so I don't really go blurting about the first thing that enters my mind (for the most part), but I'm definitely not as measured in speech as I've seen as of some introverts. Um, depending on the conservation. Like if it's intimate/someone I'm close to, definitely one-on-one. But if it's just shooting the shit I definitely prefer group discussions. I like having more people and points of views invovled :)

    13) Do you jump into action right away or do you like to know where are you jumping before leaping? Does action speaks more than words?

    I like to know where I'm jumping before I leap. But like, a vague idea of where I'm jumping, I don't need the details or anything, but I think I need to feel that it's in line with my values. I'd rather know for myself what I'm getting into than rely solely on words.

    14) It's Saturday. You're at home, and your favorite show is about to start. Your friends call you for a night out. What will you do?

    Go out. It depends on how tired I am, and if it's a much needed time in or not. But probably go out.

    15) How do you act when you're stressed out?

    I start ruminating and overthinking things to a max. I becoming incredibly moody and lash out at people who bother me, especially when I want to be alone. If I'm stressed about school or a test or something I used to would just avoid it and pretended it didn't exist/throw myself into some sort of indulgences, or paradoxically become obsessive and perfectionistic and last out again.

    16) What makes you dislike the personalities of some people?

    Ugh, where do I start? I try to always see the best in people but goddamn. Um, people that are fake, hypocritical, pretend to be something they're not. People that are exceedingly pretenious or excessively overdramatic or emotional. People that are judgy, close minded, or bigots, excessively by the book, follow the rules or else types. Did I mention judgemental?? this is by far the most irksome :/

    (I feel like I've just come off as all those things )

    17) Is there anything you really like talking about with other people?

    I really like talking about books, movies, pop-culture, personality theory (hehe), literature, art, politics, philosophy, music, dreams, hopes, all that good stuff, MEMES

    18) What kind of things do pay the least attention to in your life

    um praitical things I guess. keeping my room clean for one, money, basic skills for survival.

    19) How do your friends perceive you? What is wrong about their perception? ? What would your friends never say about your personality ?

    depends, my friends percieve me as bubbly, happy-go-lucky, funny, incredibly talkative, kinda shy but incredibly wild, silly, and hella moody. They'll definitely never say I'm narrow-minded or that I have my life together.

    20) You got a whole day to do whatever you like. What kind of activities do you feel like doing?

    attempt to finish one of the many books I've started, do some writing, some photography, go to a jazz bar with my friends, meet some new people, go to the bookstore, come home browse the internet, watch some movies on netflix, listen to music, travel and get lost somewhere, take a long bus ride for no particular reason idk

  2. #2

    Infp. You got me at "long time lurker" not that others don't lurk but an enfp would get involved sooner :)

  3. #3


    Hi there, I'm 6w7 too! I also thought I might be ENFP. Identified as such for a year or so back in the day.

    I think you're INFP soc/sx like I am :)

    Edit - haha just checked your profile and see soc/sx. Yep it fits.
    sinfinity thanked this post.

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  5. #4

    I'll go for INFP too, I'm thinking I might be one too :).
    sinfinity thanked this post.

  6. #5

    Hmm... You give me the feeling of an INFP. The Fi jumps at me most
    sinfinity thanked this post.

  7. #6

    Thank you for all the responses! :)
    Retrospectacles thanked this post.


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