Posted a thread earlier but following up with this format might make more sense. Thank you again!
1. Is there anything that may affect the way you answer the questions? For example, a stressful time, mental illness, medications, special life circumstances? Other useful information includes sex, age, and current state of mind.
Female, 21 years old. I struggle with depression and dissociation but it's been much better in the recent years. I used to have terrible OCD but have gotten it mostly under control.
2. Study these two images here and here. Which one do you prefer and why? How would you describe it?
Images the links lead to:
I greatly prefer the first image. It has a sense of serenity and freedom about it, with an endless path ahead to travel. I feel constrained and anxious when looking at the second picture, but the first one gives me a calming vibe.
3. Please describe yourself as a person if you were to introduce yourself to someone else like in a cover letter. What kind of person are you and why?
It's a bit difficult for me to think of how to describe myself in this way, but I'll do my best. I'm very introverted and selective about who I spend my time with. I'm very polite to strangers and people in general, but I'm not comfortable interacting with those I don't know well. I usually interact with them anyways since I don't want them to be uncomfortable or think that I'm not interested in them, but I would much rather be with my select few people. I'm a bit elusive and unpredictable, I change quite a lot. One minute I can be very social, the life of the party, and the next I've disappeared. I'm a digital nomad, but I return home to where my family lives in the summer to see them and spend time with my few close friends. The summers are also very beautiful here. I love being outside and I feel truly free when I'm alone with nature. I love music and write my own songs, I play a few instruments but my favorite musical activity is singing. I love abstract ideas and deep thoughts, I feel as though I am always observing and looking deeply into the world around me and life itself to understand its complexities. I hope to one day feel solid and secure in my wisdom, and to pass that wisdom onto others so they don't have to strive as hard to achieve it.
4. What kind of person would you LIKE to be? Why? What kind of person would you NOT want to be? Why?
I would like to be someone who is loved and respected by others, but also accepted for their differences and limitations. The idea of being admired seems appealing, but I find that I'm very uncomfortable in situations where I do receive admiration. So I don't think I want to be admired as much as I'd like to be appreciated. I would like to be independent and secure in myself, no matter what kinds of people or circumstances surround me. I want to find an inner peace that I can tap into in any situation. I would like to be wise, well-traveled, intelligent, knowledgeable, kind and skilled in music and the arts.
I would not like to be someone who is reliant on others or hopelessly romantic. While I would like to have a deep emotional connection to someone, I don't want my freedom to be limited by a reliance on them or their reliance on me. I'm asexual and very happy to not have that need in my life, because I feel that it supports my own personal freedom. I would hate to be someone who works a 9-to-5 job simply for the accumulation of material possessions. I would rather live in a tent in the woods than give up my freedom for something mundane and unnecessary. I don't like how wealth and prominence decide who steps on who, and I would hate to be someone who sought a higher ranking in society simply to be above others socially and materially.
5. Do you think there are any differences to how you described yourself and how people actually perceive you? How do you think others would describe you? If there are any discrepancies between these two that are you are aware of; do you know why exactly that is?
I think people see me as someone polite but quiet when they first meet me. After they've gotten to know me a bit, they see me as someone cheerful and outgoing. I had someone describe me as a "manic pixie dream girl" at one point, and another person describe me as "very honest and open". I think both of these things are a bit of an act for me, but a subconscious one. I act cheerful and funny because I want to encourage a good spirit among those I'm with, but inside I don't really feel all too much. I'm open about life experiences and emotions because I want others to also feel comfortable opening up to me, but I don't think I'm open about my true personality. My true personality is pretty quiet and contemplative, and I think that tends to bore people and make them uncomfortable, so I act differently in public. I don't think any of my friends really know the real me.
6. What in life do you find to be of importance? Why? If you are unsure you can always take the Value Test and post the results here. Do note that it helps if you narrow it down to 20 or ideally 10 values as suggested at stage
I find experiences and freedom to be important, as well as wisdom and knowledge. We derive wisdom from our experiences, and freedom opens us up to more interesting experiences. I also think that being kind, peaceful, and considerate of others is very important. The only thing that truly angers me is selfish injustice.
7. How do you react to new situations in your life? Can you describe an event in your life where you were in an unknown situation? How did you deal with it?
I think it depends on the nature of the situation. I absolutely love new physical situations, as in being in a new place. No matter how much I liked where I was living at one time, moving is so exciting to me and I can't stay in one spot for long. But new situations in regards to relationships can be hard to adjust to. When a friend changes to the point where we're no longer compatible, I feel deeply sad and take some time to process it. When I need to back away from someone because they've grown toxic, I feel very guilty and tend to close myself off for some time to process it all. Once I've processed the situation, I'm usually void of emotion in regards to it and can move on without looking back. But for the time it takes to process social changes, it's very painful and debilitating.
8. Please describe yourself when you are in a stressful situation. How do you act and why? Real life experiences are welcome.
I have a tendency to procrastinate. I hate having too many responsibilities unless those responsibilities have a deeper purpose to them. I'll switch between feeling waves of stress to not really feeling much at all. I become very irritable whenever someone or something interrupts my flow, and I try to close myself off to all external influence when I need to focus on something. That being said, I'm not particularly skilled in the focus department. When I'm emotionally stressed, I usually end up reflecting that in something physical. When I feel overwhelmed socially, I find that I tend to purge my belongings, as if the belongings represent people I wish to free myself from. I also go from place to place as a result of emotional stress, since I feel as though I can leave painful memories in the place that they occurred and move on in new surroundings. Sometimes I indulge a bit too much in food, shopping, or exercise in these situations. Other times, I refuse to eat, refuse to shop, and sleep all day. It's unpredictable.
9. Please describe yourself when you are in an enjoyable situation. How do you act and why? Real life experiences are welcome.
It depends on whether I'm by myself or with others. When I'm alone I don't show a lot of external evidence of being happy that I'm aware of, but my mind is fully engaged in what I'm experiencing and I feel a sense of peace. When I'm with others, I'm usually very expressive, I laugh a lot and smile a lot.
10. Describe your relationship to socialization. How do you perceive one-on-one interaction? How do you perceive group interaction?
I feel as though I love socializing and hate it at the same time. I'm much more peaceful when I'm alone, but sometimes things can be so much more exciting around others. I love exchanging ideas and I love helping my friends sort out their emotions. Too much is exhausting, but I'm happy to be helpful and appreciated. I really don't like big groups, and avoid parties like the plague. One-on-one socializing is difficult unless I know the person well, it feels like so much work to always be trying to make the energy pleasant. I prefer small groups for the most part, since I can usually sit back and watch whenever I'd like to without others feeling uncomfortable.
11. Describe your relationship to society. What are the elements of it you hold important or unimportant (e.g. social norms, values, customs, traditions)? How do you see people as a whole?
I believe good manners are important and I always try to make those around me feel good. I think I used to care more about society itself when I was younger, but now I tend to separate myself from it. The way I live and the viewpoints I hold aren't widely accepted or understood, so it feels better to go my own way and let others go theirs. It's more peaceful on both ends. I think people as a whole all want the same thing, but it's manifested in different ways. Ultimately, we all want happiness and love, but there are many different forms of love and many different things people seek happiness from. I believe people are all different, but we will always have similarities at our core.
12. Describe your relationship to authority. How do you perceive authority? What does it mean to you, and how do you deal with it?
It depends on the intentions of the authority. Authority exists in many cases to keep those under it safe, and in that sense it is good and should be protected. When authority works for the wellbeing of those under it, it's at its best. However, when authority exists simply to create ranking or to oppress others, it's at its worst. I absolutely hate how motivated people are by money, and when authority is motivated by money, it tends to do some very bad things. I gladly listen to authority when the intention/effect is in the right place (protecting people), but I tend to be critical and selective of the value of rules when they seem to exist to constrain or oppress, or to claim something that doesn't or shouldn't belong to them.
13. Describe your relationship to order and chaos. What do order and chaos mean to you? How do they manifest in your daily life?
I suppose order and chaos are the ebb and flow of life itself. Just like the weather, there must be sunny days, rainy days, stormy days, and snowy days. Each of these kinds of weather have different levels of order and chaos, but if it was always sunny, no plants would grow, and if it was always rainy many kinds of plants, bugs and animals would drown. Both need to exist in a balance with each other for the best outcome. Likewise, order and chaos need to exist in unison for life to be what it is. I'm not particularly sure how these affect me personally, I'd have to think about it some.
14. What is it that you fear in life? Why? How does this fear manifest to you both in how you think and how you act?
I fear a life that lacks meaning, and an existence without freedom. I work to gain just enough money that I need for just enough things that I need so that I can have more free time. I don't believe in accumulating possessions and commitments just for the feeling you get from them, and I think everything should serve a purpose and add value to your life. I don't want to be married or own things that tie me down, even if they may have their enjoyable moments. There are many things to find joy in, and I can find that same joy in things that don't limit me.
15. What is it that you desire in life? What do you strive to achieve? Why? Where do you think these drives and desires stem from or are inspired by?
I desire to find peace within myself, and to be able to spread that peace to others. I want to be happy, and I want others to be happy, and I'll do what I can to encourage that outcome to the best of my ability. I want to achieve a life rich in experiences, so that when I'm old I can pass them on to those who will come after me, and they can find value in the wisdom from them even if they choose to lead a different lifestyle.
16. a) What activities energize you most? b) What activities drain you most? Why?
a) I love to sleep. I'd sleep all day if I could. I also like being alone in nature, practicing music, listening to music and thinking. I love going out to new restaurants with close friends, or trying new cafes. Really just being somewhere I haven't been before or trying something I haven't done is exciting.
b) Trying to balance lots of secular pursuits, large social gatherings, and really being anywhere people are. Shopping is also very draining for me, as is being at the mall for a long time, since I tend to think way too deeply about advertising and the psychology behind it. I can be kind of a killjoy in those situations, so I just keep my mouth shut and let people have a good time while I overthink it. Lol.
17. Why do you want to know your type? What type do you think you are? Why this/these type(s)? Is there a type that appeals to you, to your self-perception, that you would like to be? Why? If you know your enneagram, please post this here. If you have done any online function tests such as the Keys2Cognition, it helps if you post these results here as well.
I want to know my type so I can better understand and develop myself. According to what I've read of cognitive functions, I think I'm an INFJ, but considering how rare INFJs are said to be I'm unsure. It seems there's a lot of contradictory information surrounding INFJs, so I'm truly not even sure what makes a real INFJ. I think I'm a 4w5 enneagram. I used to think I was a 2w3, back when I focused more on helping others, but I've since realized that I can't make everyone happy so it's best to focus on your own happiness and the happiness of those few who will let you help them.
18. Finally, is there something else you find to be of importance you want to add about yourself you think might be of relevance when helping to type you?
My best friend is an INTP, and I get along well with her because she tends to be pretty stable emotionally. She has her moments when something is off and she won't tell me, which can be frustrating, but usually I know she's content and as a result I can be content. I can identify my own feelings better when I'm with her, when usually I'm unable to separate how I feel from the emotions of those I'm around.