Who am I? I feel un-typable.

Who am I? I feel un-typable.

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This is a discussion on Who am I? I feel un-typable. within the What's my personality type? forums, part of the Personality Cafe category; Well... here I am again posting on the same forum with the same goal in mind and that is quite ...

  1. #1

    Who am I? I feel un-typable.

    Well... here I am again posting on the same forum with the same goal in mind and that is quite simply trying to figure out my Myers Briggs type.

    I don't know what my fascination is with the test, I think originally it was just for fun and then it turned into finding out who I am... I have never really been comfortable being myself and I have never really felt that I could fit in a category. Of course, I know that personality is complex and no matter what people are different and set apart by their experiences and other psychological factors but to be grouped into a type was more than just a fun little quiz, it was a path to self-discovery.

    Part of me really wants to type out a questionnaire, but I have done this time and time again with differing results. The same goes with the online tests, none really seem to be that accurate as the results vary depending on my mood, I feel like I try and make myself out to be something I'm not and this is really starting to take a toll on me.

    So here I go, I'll describe myself as brutally honest as possible and in exchange, I would like someone to decipher my head that is confusing to me and will more than likely be confusing to you as well. If you feel that I fit into a set type, then please explain it. At this point I'm not trying to fit into a category, I'm actually just annoyed that I can't acknowledge being in one set type and that it differs on a day to day basis. I don't care what the answer is, but if you could explain why that would be great.

    I don't really know where to begin so I will start with school, school to me is boring. I stopped really caring about my grades in Elementary school when my disabilities started to take its toll. Of course, I could have worked harder but I didn't really see a point. My goal since then, even in College is just not failing. Most classes bore me even if the topic sounds interesting, I hate being in a room full of people who I can feel are either trying too hard, competing with one another, or quite frankly like me don't want to be there. I generally just want to be left alone but of course, being in College that is almost impossible and that quite frankly annoys me.

    Lets see... future careers? Ever since I was a child I thought about being something mostly everything from fireman to cook, from cop to teacher, something to strive for but I gave up trying to figure out what I wanted after High School. I graduated early, wanted to enlist, the recruiters wanted nothing to do with me and my family and teachers disapproved saying I was too much of a hard worker to pass further educating myself. I don't mind College but it definitely isn't all that people make it out to be and the only thing I enjoy about is the endless amounts of alcohol and attractive girls.

    I am terrible with people and always have been, I only go to parties for the alcohol, I am rather socially awkward. I can't present to save my life, my presentations are so bad that people watching feel bad for me. I have a few friends but sometimes I question my friendships, as I go through College I realize how much I enjoy just being alone without the company of others and how I don't need to hangout with people to feel good about myself or make up for negative traits.

    My relationships as far as dating and what not are also non-existant and have quite frankly, always been. I can't push myself to ask a girl out on a date because I am afraid of being rejected. I am also shy and not particarly good looking, if you have read this far you will also notice that for the most part I ramble and overthink everything which of course I can't imagine is an attractive trait, more than likely I'd pass going on a date with me too. But don't worry about me, I don't need to go on a date to go out and grab some coffee or enjoy myself. To be honest, one night stands almost sound like a blessing, on one end its not a committment. But... of course, I won't lie when I say that I feel like I'd regret it in the morning.

    AHH regret, I have so much of that. Most of the time when a decision I make impacts another human being I can dwell on it and overthink it and it can drive me nearly insane. I generally feel really bad about hurting other people to the point that has made me passive aggressive and avoidant of conflicts as well as extremely indecisive.

    NOW... conflict... heres the funny thing about conflict. I can fight, I have fought, I have impacted pain on people but at the end of the day I regret it. I enjoyed the rush almost, but at the same time, I hated how a situation had to resort to violence, I was picked on and defended myself so no fears, I'm not a bloodlust psycho or anything of that sort. I do enjoy the rush of fighting and its something that regretably I am quite decent at. But, at the same time I wish people would have just left me be so I didn't have to hurt them, but of course, at the end of the day if a bully is picking on me or another person I can't help but step in. Same goes for animal abuse, I could quite honestly see myself killing someone for doing something terrible to an animal. I understand hunting but at the same time I don't hold a high degree of respect for hunters, I have tracked deer for fun and its not incredibly difficult... I don't see the point or need for camo and military style gear and tactics for an animal that you could easily find sober.

    My friends... have descibed me as, mysterious and quiet, a good listener, someone who is there and supportive. Hahaha, most of them would call me a good friend. I don't think I'm anything special, I'm loyal of course, I'm generally honest, I listen but I think that these are terrible traits to describe someone. I would expect this from anyone who is a friend, I think its messed up that most people think of me as these things. Sure I do them, but I do them because it feels right to me and because I don't see the point in being backstabbing, lying, or someone that ignores someone.

    BACK TO COLLEGE REAL QUICK. My degree is currently history but I am starting to hate it, I always enjoyed history notably military actions and biographies, when I was a kid I would go to the library instead of recess if the teacher would let me. I am debating switching to a Liberal Arts degree and becoming a Military Officer after College because I don't want to take my chances working on a low end job that I would hate and I want the challenge and because I've heard that Officer quarters are better than enlisted in that I can sleep in my own room which College has taught me to appreciate.

    Of course, I read through this or rather thought about what I wrote. I think I'm introverted... I don't know what introverted function I use. I am fairly sure I am feeler, I have enourmous amounts of empathy and emotions. I can't express my emotions very well, when I do its generally in anger and frustration with bouts of happiness and laughter around those I am at ease with. Most of the time, I think of others when making a decision, I put others first everytime, I feel bad when I don't. I hate conflict and arguing, I have a few friends who I am fairly sure are thinkers and they annoy me sometimes because I see them as very ignorant... of course, not all, but for the most part I can't stand people who don't consider the emotions of others and are self-centered.If anyone has any idea please reply and help a confused, probably overthinking dude out.
    Ermenegildo thanked this post.

  2. #2

    About 95% sure you're INFP, I could explain why but do you know about cognitive functions and stuff? Don't wanna overwhelm yah. Well anyway in case you learn about them, you're obviously an intuitive and an introvert, definitely use Fi instead of Fe, too spontaneous, indecisive and passive to be NTJ, which makes you INFP. And anyway, you just remind me of INFP dudes, bless their hearts.

  3. #3

    Definitely infx
    JerryK thanked this post.

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  5. #4
    ENFP - The Inspirers

    Got the feeing for an INFP as well!
    JerryK thanked this post.

  6. #5
    Unknown Personality

    JerryK thanked this post.

  7. #6

    Quote Originally Posted by Knowyourtype.com
    The INFP will ask, “who am I?” and want a real answer.
    Quote Originally Posted by JerryK
    Who am I? I feel un-typable.

    and becoming a Military Officer after College because I don't want to take my chances working on a low end job that I would hate and I want the challenge and because I've heard that Officer quarters are better than enlisted in that I can sleep in my own room which College has taught me to appreciate.
    Please don't do that! You are not an ISTJ. Do some overresearching instead of the usually misleading overthinking.

    My relationships as far as dating and what not are also non-existant and have quite frankly, always been. I can't push myself to ask a girl out on a date because I am afraid of being rejected. I am also shy and not particularly good looking, if you have read this far you will also notice that for the most part I ramble and overthink everything which of course I can't imagine is an attractive trait, more than likely I'd pass going on a date with me too. But don't worry about me, I don't need to go on a date to go out and grab some coffee or enjoy myself.
    Don't be afraid of women, two thirds of them have a Feeling preference like you, so you can understand them much better than two thirds of men.

    You should do all the things you don't dare to do, and you need a wing man to help you with that. Your overthinking produces as many excuses as you need to paralyze yourself. Thinking can't replace experience! The year 2015 should become your “Year of the empiricist”.
    JerryK and Bash thanked this post.

  8. #7

    Hi @JerryK ! I do find the feeling that you are ISFP. Do you lose temper when someone rudely criticizes you? Do you find the need to always stay true to yourself (strong Fi)? Can you sometimes be all jittery and restless? Do you rapidly notice everything and everyone when you walk into a room full of people (Maybe Se)? Do you constantly, based on the stimuli you received, imagine all the possibilities that might happen in that same room (Ni)?

    But of course, I'm not that good in typing. You can however read descriptions of both INFP and ISFP. Or better yet, know your enneagram. You can mistype yourself in MBTI since your other functions might also be well developed. It's more of a cognitive function than a personality function. So go find your enneagram. I get a feel that you are a type 6 or a 1... but mostly a six. Go do research on your enneagram type and see what clicks. Here is a good description of type 6: https://personalitycafe.com/type-6-fo...scription.html

    You can also take the classic enneagram test which can be found here: Eclectic Energies Enneagram Tests (free)
    Hope this helps!
    JerryK thanked this post.

  9. #8

    Hello, before I ramble on I just wanted to take the quick time to thank everyone that read through all of that writing that I typed up the other night, as well as say thank you for the replies.

    I read each one and they were all very insightful, apologies for not replying as quickly as I would have hoped but I have been busy with the holidays as well as really thinking about everything that people have said and trying to process it and figure out how to properly reply to it as well as thinking about how it relates to me and my personal quest of discovering myself.

    So, I read the responses and many people seem to think that I am an Fi dominant individual, particuarly the INFP or the ISFP. I think lately, I can agree that I am more than likely one or the other. I think a lot of my mistakes stem from mostly of course, overthinking it way too much as well as taking the wrong tests, and answering the questions when I think are very biased at least when I answer them I feel like they differ depending on my mood or mental state at the time that I answer. I think when I read the functions between the two I can see myself using the Fi, Ne, Si, and Te functions more than the other functions.

    I am knowledged in the Myers-Briggs Cognitive Functions but I am by no means an expert or someone that can really identify which particular traits I personally use when making decisions or other factors that involve the functions. When I am explaining personality profiles and functions, please bear with me I am using a site that I read through from time to time called cognitiveprocesses.com.

    So... warning to those reading this, I will probably ramble on about the functions trying to really decipher what I personally think of it. If you read through it, input is more than appreciated and I won't meet any replies with hostility or aggressiveness. Promise.
    Alright, first thing I really want to look at is the INFP profile and maybe say what I think. Okay... so reading from that current website I'm using... it says the theme is advocacy and integrity. Okay... so I just had to google what advocacy meant... the act of pleading for, supporting, or recommending. I'm going to presume that this means, advocating for rights or other people or my personal ideas? If this is the case then I can definitely see this but to an extent. I am definitely a person of integrity, for one I have a hard time lying and backstabbing other people. I think... I do recommend what I believe is the right thing to other people a lot. I don't mean to but I think I'm definitely an adviser over a king, I just know if something is wrong and I really do unintentionally I think try to press what I believe is acceptable and wrong onto other people. I have very deep values or instead of deep lets use the word internal, I have very internal values that I will keep to myself most of the time. Another thing this website says is... loyal advocates and champions, caring deeply about their causes and a few special people. Well, that definitely narrowed me down in a nutshell. Yeah, I really do care about a few causes and people, and when I really care about those causes or people. I think something that a lot of people underestimate about me is that I really do care... I think I have a hard time expressing it, I have a really really hard time expressing my emotions. I can't even cry a lot of the time, and the worst part is, its something that I'm not proud of. In todays culture, men are supposed to not cry, I can cry and I have but it has to be something really really personal. I used to really think I was an Fe user because I put people first and I cared for other people, I would do anything for someone I care about but after a lot of personal analysis I don't think I'm as much of an Fe user as I would personally hope to be. In my past questionnaires, I think this was easily mixed up. I would say things such as I would protect people, I put others before myself, and to some extent this is very true but I really think I forgot to mention that I really only care about people that I am loyal to or someone that I can really connect or feel bad for.

    I mean... I relate to this description but I don't know if this really means I'm an INFP or not. I am only contradicting being an INFP probably due to misconceptions as well as having a hard time believing I'm a dreamer or something. But then again, part of this could easily be due to the fact that I am in the midst I think of really trying to be myself. Growing up I think I had to put on a tough guy fake mask and its definitely taking its toll coming out of or trying to really... yeah. I know in reality, I'm not the badass that I make people think I am. Growing up I told people I wanted to be a soldier when in reality, its not something I think I could do very well or at least, I'm the type of soldier that wouldn't be a good soldier, maybe a good person but not a good soldier. I know that I have a heart, I really do feel for other people, if I saw someone being beaten down it'd affect me, its not something I could ignore or turn away from. I think I considered being a soldier growing up because I wanted something meaningful out of my job, I wanted to help people. People asked me why I wanted to enlist or join the Military and I never said to serve my country, don't get me wrong I love my country but for the most part I think it was because I just wanted a job with meaning and in a corny sense of using this word, honor. I still think about enlisting from time to time or in the future but, I think I can agree that I would probably make a very bad Officer or leader. I'm like I said earlier, I am a much better adviser than I am leader. I get very stressed out and I have a very time bossing people around. I'm the kind of leader that when put in charge considers others before the organization and will approach others with kindness and respect, not aggression and disconsideration.

    The other type that I have considered is ISFP. I think the part that I really relate to isÖ hm. I donít mean to sound biased, I really do believe I could be an ISFP but I am not really feeling a connection to most of what is one here. Iíll try and go over them and say why I am and why Iím not any maybe someone can say if itís a bad indication to base off of. Okay, with their senses tuned in, they become totally absorbed in the action of the moment, finding just what fits the situation. I donít really know about this one, I am for the most part in my head a lot. I think even when my adrenaline is spiked I feel like I have a hard focusing on whatís going on. But that being said, I love action. I donít know. I think this is just a terrible description. And Iím really bad at figuring out my functions and relating to stuff. I think the function its trying to describe is Se, whichÖ I donít really know if I have or not. I like being active, I really enjoy working out, I mostly just like doing something to get my mind to calm down, to focus on something. Like I said, I overthink everything so it feels good to just try and focus, its not an 100% cure but working out for me is cool because it builds confidence and its always been something that I enjoyed doing. Thrive on having the freedom to vary what they do until they get just the right effect. YES. If I am put in charge of something or given responsibility for it I want full freedom to do what I want to get it done. Take action to help others and demonstrate values. Uh. Depends on the situation, most of the time I like chilling in the background but if I am really touched by something Iíll step in and do something. AND FEEL REALLY GOOD ABOUT MYSELF :). Kind and sensitive to the suffering of others. Yes for sure! I have a friend who is veryÖ we have our differences in what we think of emotions I think. We have a friend who always wanted to talk about the bad relationship she was in and he shrugged her off, he actually told her to stop talking to him about it. WellÖ I listen, I actually listen very well and can offer some apparently good information that helps a lot. I donít know, Iím generally really good at listening to peoples problems because I can put myself in someoneís shoes very easily. I have read that both ISFPís and INFPís can do this. But for me, I canít be mean to someoneís shoes when I feel like internally I can feel their pain. Iím also pretty good at reading people, in that, if something is wrong with someone I can generally tell to what degree of pain theyíre in and make predictions on other things like whatís going on or what their goal or objective is. I think I could really be either ISFP or INFP, I can really feel a weird connection to both. I think a few things that make me feel like Iím an ISFP over INFP is that I take things literally, Iíve just read online that sensors are more literal or at least they hear more literally. Another thing is I love playing guitar, itís a really good feeling. And of course, like I said I love working and being active. I donít know, like I said, I feel like I could probably be one or the other.

    Enneagram, I have taken the test many times, I even took the test today and got the same result I generally get. I have read the descriptions and I can agree that I am probably an enneagram six. I am not particarly sure about my wing but for the most part I can agree with everything from the basic desires and fears.

    Another thing I really wanted to point out was thank you to everyone for the kindness, I really appreciate the kind replies in ways that me typing cannot describe. If anyone thinks I'm another type or an INFP and could please tell me why that would help, I believe it I think but I want reinforcement I guess. I'm really trying not to overthink it which I think I am probably doing. I think theres a good chance I'm an INFP and that I am just having a hard time comprehending it because most people describe them as softies and emotional, which... I probably am actually thinking about it, I just can't express it because I don't want to be ridiculed for it.

    No joke, if you read this far, thank you for your interest I guess and if you have anything you want to mention or point out feel free.

  10. #9


    Do not look at the type descriptions because MBTI is all about cognitive functions (how you would prefer to think things through)... not personality per se. Enneagram talks more about the personality side IMO.
    JerryK thanked this post.

  11. #10

    I sincerely think you're INFP. I'm not stellar at typing but from what I understand of functions there's just so much Ne in your writing, jumping around between ideas, saying "I could be this, but I could be this, but...", seeing many possibilities but not clinging tightly to one, etc. It's pretty clear to me you're an intuitive. To be honest you remind me of myself when I first found out I was INFP. I saw the title "Dreamy Idealist" and I laughed awkwardly, like there was no way I could have such an embarrassing title. Then I asked a few of my friends if this fit me. They all point-blank said yes. So you never know. I wouldn't say enjoying exercise, being active, and playing guitar are necessarily indicative of Se. Se does for the sake of doing, takes in surroundings, experiences. Se lives in the moment, is more prone to act on impulses. You said you exercise to calm your mind and to help you focus; Se is more likely to exercise simply for the experience, for the adrenaline rush (obviously not true for every Se but you know). Is your mind still filled with ideas/thoughts when you exercise? This might point to N. I feel like Se would be busy using their senses to take in their surroundings.

    Since it sounds like you're mostly just reluctant to say you're straight-up INFP, you could try watching videos of male INFPs on Youtube and see what that does for you, or just read about male INFPs, see if it resonates with you. I really like this one -->
    ( )
    And of course, do the same with ISFPs if you wish. It's also helpful to read articles/posts on how to spot the cognitive functions in real life. But just know that there's nothing wrong with being INFP! I'm sure you realize that but I just wanted to reiterate. Hope you figure out which type you are soon, whichever it ends up being. Good luck! And if all else fails, no one's going to kill you if you just go with IxFP :)
    JerryK thanked this post.

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