I usually cope — by being alone; for sufficient self-care / self-reboot, isolation — and perhaps, an unstable (Se)-fixation. If I do this correctly; I have enough (self-rebooting juice) to battle through it; without dwelling within it. Upon the unexpected death of my father earlier this year; while I was sad — the funeral arrangement(s) needed to be done.
My mindset ::
''It has to be done.'' - and my accomplishment; that is, giving him a decent funeral — was more satisfying than any soaking up the pillows + sitting around discussing malfunctions / problems on the shoulders of strangers / relatives. A magnificent funeral for a magnificent man - and that is what he deserved; there wasn't really sufficient time for a sob-fest, in a sense, I appreciated it. Do not let me dwell; by any means -- as this where the sensitivities to unhealthy (mechanism) arises. (e.g., drinking / sugars / - high-sex / pleasure indulgences) with depleting physical health.
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There is a notion that such coping mechanism's are ''unhealthy,'' (perhaps to another type) — I disagree; rather it is a coping mechanism unique to INTJ — and indeed, an eminently subjective one, like there is one unique to ISFJ - INFP - ENFJ - ISFP. I will not perceive, nor solve problem(s) like an INFJ — why should I ''cope'' akin to one; in a way that is most efficient for an INFJ; rather than an INTJ.
While it is not the recommended 'coping' mechanism — I have yet, to necessarily been disappointed in such a coping alternative. My problem(s) get solved, relatively fast — in fact, with as little outside-knowledge / outside-help as possible, or simplistically with a one-on-one approach.
I am most comfortable; dealing with strong emotion(s) within my own privacy sanctum — (e.g., they are exposed, and resolved), I would not be comfortable anywhere else, and when outside my privacy sanctum. Like I tell the religious - that wonder how ''atheists'' cope, it is merely through seeking ways to overcome; endure than hold hands and dwell.
Someone warned me; if I do not ''let it out'' and whine hysterically on strange shoulders; it will ''come out later'' (e.g., in anger, or unexpectedly).
I disagree, and this has never occurred for myself. It is not the the type of 'coping' mechanism that causes so many (malfunctions); rather the inabilities to cope at all (untreated sadness) and indeed, the former is only one way.
