Flirt with an ENTJ

Ikusagami said:

@Scarlet.Black
You just want to reestablish the monopoly on my affections. :tongue:
Somebody who loves to tie me to a bed in a torture dungeon would be the first to know a trap when she sees it.

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Warp11 said:

You can begin with a problem statement and set your objective around that. Gather as much data as you have available.
Map out your current state and identify pain points or areas to improve.
Assess the root cause of issues and brainstorm solutions.
Map out your ideal future state and create an action plan. Check in after a set amount of time to evaluate your progress and results.

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Vexus said:

ENTJ are definitely not scared. It seems they are direct and know what they want, and have no issue letting you know what they want. My local ENTJ friend told his long-distance love interest that if he moves in her direction he's not coming for nothing; he will have her. From... personal experience... ENTJ is so direct with flirting that it's very good for INFJ's Ni to go further and make more happen.

Hmmm... which tame example can I present... lol...

Example (paraphrasing, sort of):
<steak arrives, no steak knife on table, holding butter knife>
Me: <joking/bewildered there was no steak knife delivered> "Do they even have steak knives?"
Her: "Maybe ask the waitress."
Me: <gets up, walks over to the waitress as she's walking back/about to respond to neighbor table, directly asks for steak knife, returns to table>
Her: "That was so hot."

ENTJ are in-charge people, so taking charge of things yourself (indicating they won't have to take charge all the time, and, in this example, avoiding the awkward wait as the waitress might walk by and not give attention while you're waiting to be addressed by the waitress but instead you remove all that and go get what you want), is like flirting with them. ENTJ is used to intimidating people, so when you show you're not intimidated, and that you have a handle on things, they respond well and want more of it.

Local ENTJ friend is very impressed with his long-distance love interest's strong mind and ability to handle her difficult situation with grace.

I think more than any other type, when an ENTJ is flirting with you, there's no doubt their intention and what they want. And yet, they still possess the ability to be practical about it and control themselves (if healthy, I assume; perhaps unhealthy would fall into temptation). Meaning, the ability to both want something and be very flirtatious, but at the same time, understanding it may be too early to act on it. Flirting is then heavy, knowing there is something wanted, but needing to perhaps ensure there's no wasted time, even though there will be time waiting to act on any flirting. I hope that makes sense: the ENTJ is direct to ensure they are not wasting their time; they check if you're interested or not, and let you know clearly when they are interested to see how you handle it. If you respond in-kind... it's um... well... there can be lots of chemistry If you're lukewarm, they might not want to waste their time.

I think that dynamic is exceptional for INFJ, who already intuitively knows what the other person wants or is feeling, and thus with an ENTJ, the INFJ gets feedback on it in realtime, allowing the INFJ to create more and more events which draw out that desired flirtatiousness. INFJ connect the data points to understand the whole picture, and when you have clear data points from the ENTJ regarding what is working, you get to weave an amazing situation effortlessly. The INFJ is constantly drawing out more directness from the ENTJ, so the INFJ knows what is working and then can create more dynamics which draw out more directness from the ENTJ. It's a good feedback loop. From my personal experience, it's like I'm on autopilot since I'm not having to intuit how something was received, and can focus instead on drawing out tons of laughter, presenting intrigue and dynamic thoughts, all effortlessly. If the topic is funny, there's a laugh, usually with some theme presented by the ENTJ, at which point I expand the theme, causing more laughter, and it's all so effortless, I don't even know what I said afterwards, but I saliently remember the emotional responses received.

This goes both ways and has been interesting; by both ways, I mean, when something is not received well, it is also obvious. Since INFJ can be direct as well, but in odd ways, it's important to pay close attention to the ENTJ response, since they're very practical in the way they expect things to go. Communication is key; don't let something sit. For example, if ENTJ asks if you want to go somewhere, but you say no, they think you feel how they would feel when being told no. In other words, they might take you saying no as being more harsh than it is. As in... let's say you have two choices, one to go to location A, another to location B. ENTJ asks you what you'd like to do. You say you want to go to location C (see what I did there). ENTJ now thinks that you will be unhappy if you both go to either location A or B, instead of going to location C (which you've stated you want to do). Since it's very likely you (INFJ) don't really mind whether you go to A, B or C, it's important to ensure ENTJ knows you're not upset about where to go (that you're not going to your preference C), and that you're just stating a preference, which won't affect anything else in going to A or B instead. ENTJ don't want to cause negative Fi responses, because they dislike feeling negative Fi feelings, so it can be a little bit of projection on their part, where Fe is more accepting regarding any situation which keeps the Fi user in good spirits, even if it's against a preferred choice. Letting ENTJ know that you will be happy going to their preference A, even though your preference is C, is important. Don't let them think they are bringing you down if that is not the case.

I think avoidant and combative personalities clash with ENTJ. Where some types enjoy sarcastic banter and making fun of people they are interested in, this doesn't work with ENTJ. I think this is why ENTJ are actually relatively loyal in relationships; they present a serious nature, so people try to break through that by being sarcastic and poking fun at them, which causes a negative Fi response in the ENTJ, so the ENTJ loses any interest in that person. The way to the ENTJ is to be extremely clear with what you want and to take charge, showing through visible action (to fulfill their Se) what you are, so they can build an intuition (Ni) regarding how you fit in to their world (fulfilling their Te; "do I 'win' with this person in my life?"). Keep things positive and their Fi is never engaged in a negative way, and all is well. This is perhaps the hardest part for INFJ! Worth its own paragraph.

INFJ want more connection than most people can give. I truly think only another INFJ can fulfill the amount of connection an INFJ wants - however, such a thing could be unhealthy as everything else in life might then take a back seat to romance, causing failures of a practical nature to abound in the relationship. It's important for INFJ to not fall into the temptation to push things too fast with ENTJ, even though you know you could, simply because you want to avoid any negative Fi expression from the ENTJ. So even though you want to connect more, and know the ENTJ wants to connect with you more, it's important to deny yourself and let the ENTJ continue to take charge of the situation; they will make time for you when they have free time. Understanding the ENTJ wants the connection just as much, but also highly prioritizes their time and other projects, means those bouts of silence are not a offense to the INFJ; the ENTJ is reserving their focus for when they have free time to spend with you. And that's the key, as the INFJ becomes patient, the ENTJ will make time for the INFJ as they have time; the ENTJ will be asking you out and making plans with you in mind, but won't be devoting all day to texting you; they'll be thinking of you, but won't waste time on it daydreaming. Instead, they will complete their projects and work so when they do have time to spend with you, they can give you their full attention. INFJ wants more connection all the time, but also needs to do practical things, so instead of seeking more connection, the INFJ should focus on doing those practical things they may be procrastinating on.

Key to ENTJ:

• Appeal to their Se by dressing very nice, being attractive (even if it's just good clothes/style is probably fine), and being in their vision; keep eye contact.
• Be direct and clear about your intentions; the ENTJ will either like your intentions and want more of whatever you're offering, or reject you and break the connection - no need to waste time; you will clearly and quickly know either way how they feel about your intentions.
• Be very honest and open; their Ni knows when something is off, and if something is off, it will trigger a negative Fi reaction, causing failure of the connection.
• Keep positive and composed; trigger positive Fi response in the ENTJ through laughter, directness and genuine interest in them. Take charge of situations to put them at ease so they don't feel stressed feeling like they have to take charge themselves.

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Warp11 said:

It is possible but my reply to your post was not meant to be flirting. I gave you the key to the universe to help with fixing project errors. The key needs to fill a hole. If you use the key and report back with positive results, then you will be on your way to making an ENTJs dick very hard.
(Not mine, mind you. Just cuz I don't have one despite my BDE lol)
😽

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