Self-help book recommendations?

Probably in this order:

1. The Seven Storey Mountain / Elected Silence by Thomas Merton - Highly recommended if you are even remotely interested in the spiritual life. Merton wrote this autobiography in his late 20s, describing his itinerant childhood, troubled teenage in the UK, and his turbulent 20s as a political activist and aspiring novelist in New York, before a series of inspirations led him to settling down as a monk in one of the most silent monastic orders of Catholic Christianity. It is a very, very rich narration of a journey from inner emptiness to richness and meaning. Definitely the most inspiring book I have read. Merton was certainly a 4.

2. Most books by J. Krishnamurti, except the dialogues. Krishnamurti intensely describes the activity of the mind in the here and now, helping you come in touch with your own mind and understand the more spiritual, meaningful aspects of it, vis-a-vis those that keep us struggling. The First and Last Freedom is probably the best of his books, although they are all similar. Krishnamurti was a 4, I think and probably the most spiritual person I have come across in books or real life.

3. Swamplands of the Soul by James Hollis - written by a Jungian psychotherapist, it is based on the idea that negative states of mind aren't just something to get out of as soon as possible, but something that may hold a potential meaning for where our deeper self wants our life to go. For example, anger sometimes means we are being constricted, and we need to expand, express our being in larger ways. It has a chapter on each negative emotion - sorrow, loneliness, boredom, anger, guilt, etc. Very thoughtful and contemplative.

4. Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl - touched a deep chord in me in emphasising the significance of meaning in our lives, found either in relationship, or in work, or in accepting our situation with dignity. Frankl was a 4w3, ENFP. A very touching, hope-giving book.

5. The Impact of God by Iain Matthew - again, only for those who have an interest in the spiritual life. Basically, it is an explanation of the meaning of suffering. It explains suffering as a source of spiritual growth, especially if we can have the right attitude to it - which is one of open listening. Matthew considers God to be always present, and suffering to be his way of building down our expectations of what we think life should be, which keep us from knowing God. Another deep, contemplative book.

6. I and Thou by Martin Buber - this is a deeply philosophical, intuitive, abstract book, a bit like the sayings of the Taoist masters. It's theme is that all living is living in relation, first of all in relation to people but also to our own emotional states and to the objects in our lives. Relation can either be deadening and isolating, or enriching and meaning giving. A book with layers and layers of meaning, to be read many times. Many consider it a book that offers a spiritual way of life mostly without bringing in mainstream religion. Buber was a 4w5 INFP, I think. It's the most 4w5 book I have ever read.

7. Becoming Partners by Carl Rogers - Carl Rogers was the most humane, open-minded and humble psychotherapist. Each chapter in this book is an interview of a couple in a relationship that is functional, flourishing, floundering, or otherwise, followed by Rogers' comments on what he thinks makes the relationship work and not work. Also a lot of writing on the rising divorce rates and the difficulty of being happy in a relationship. Basically says that unconditional positive regard, empathy, and a full exploration of one's inner states in the presence of a loving partner are central to the growth of a relationship. Rogers was a 9w1, INFP I think.

8. Man and His Becoming According to the Vedanta by Rene Guenon - a very philosophical, intellectual book but one which can affect you deeply on your feelings about life, afterlife, and where we all came from.