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Sigma Female: Is that You?

[Enneagram Type 8]
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#21 ·
LeoCat said:
Very Fe pm. I take things people say literally. Aspie. or just very rational. I don't know which.

Don't ask me if you don't want my opinion.
Click to expand...

I asked your opinion on this thread, adn then I argued with it.

Kind of an asshole move on my part.

Sorry.
 
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#22 ·
RiseOfSigma said:
do you have fantasies of submitting to a more dominant man?

I ask, not for disrespect, but rather I see females who are dominant in their physical space turn out to submissive in the sexual arena. They don't like the beta man, they want to be with a more dominant man. There is "art" there too.
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I can't believe this question. :dry:

I don't know or care if I'm a Sigma or not, whatever that is, but I don't believe it's at all true that women "who are dominant in their physical space turn out to submissive in the sexual arena".

First, there are many different kinds of relationships and many different kinds of people. Some people can have a very different relationship with each partner they may have in the course of their lives, also depending on what type of relationship they have. An individual can have a very different relationship with their just-sex-partner than they have with a person they're in a long-term, very emotional relationship with. There's also several elements to each relationships, not just sexual but others too. If you look at the most average couples you know, they may complement each other in different ways, one of them can be more domineering in some things and the other in others depending on what it is.

In a strictly sexual context, it's kind of silly to me to try to classify everyone as a sub or a Dom. Some people are switches and have sex with fellow switches, some people it depends on their partner and can have a different dynamic depending on the person they're having sex with. It's not always so black-and-white as all that. Further, even in a BDSM setting the impression I have is that for most people it's a mutual thing, even the person who is in charge still needs to keep in mind the safety and well-being of the sub.

To address your specific quote... some women may be like that, that's the keyword here, some. Just as some guys can be like that as well. Just as some men and women are very shy and unassertive in public but in sexual situations can be very domineering. Just as some people are consistently whichever in both or switch depending on what's going on.

I don't believe for a second it depends on gender. I know guys who fit that description to a T... it depends on the individual's personality more than what gender they identify as.

Which is why I find it annoying when that sort of description is mainly applied to women. It ends up sounding to me like a way of invalidating strong women, like saying, "strong women put up this facade but in private they just want to be spanked and put on a leash and bossed around by a man". Which is odd, because I don't see how it has any relevance what someone does in the bedroom, and even if it did then I don't see why it's so relevant that some (not all) women are into that and the need to assume that has something to do with how "strong" they are in public. If there's any correlation for SOME women then it's probably for the same reasons as for men, the fact that SOME people like to have an arena where they're more vulnerable as opposed to those where they are not... again that's by no means universal to all women or all people.

I should also note, not all women like men at all or exclusively... just as not all guys are interested in women.
 
#24 ·
Ladies, a question for you.

What kind of man would it be to even wonder the question the OP asked?

Misogynist comes to my mind. What say you?
 
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#25 ·
While recruiting others to affirm something that's pretty clear from his questions is a way to win, it isn't a good way to settle an argument which has been going on for what looks like a month?
(That being said, he is either a misogynist or horribly clued out to the real world.)
 
#26 ·
1.Not all type 8 girls are sigma girls,just like not all INTJ are sigma girls.
2.Yes,sigma females are on the self-development side.
3.You need to specify what is "using their sexiness to their advantage"? For me, if using puppy eyes face and flirting words can get a discount of something that is worthy. But if you ask me to sleep and sex with a guy to exchange a business back,NO.
 
#33 ·
I reckon I'd count. I'm doing my Bachelor's in physics, I do art, sing, play the piano.
I'm a goth as well.
Introverted, but then I don't have miuch in common with most people my age. (21). I'm in a relationship.
As for this feminine core stuff, or masculine core stuff I think that's a pretty big oversimplification to apply to people in general. I don't think most traits should be gendered. I mean I don't exactly fit neatly into any box and I don't feel the need to try either.
I only really flirt with my boyfriend since I'm indifferent to most people unless they provide good companionship, get in my way, or perhaps they have something of interest to me?
I don't go out of my way to dominate others, but it's more like I resist attempts at domination or people trying to one-up me.
 
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#34 ·
Experienced older Sigma female here to enlighten you with knowing that a sigma female just does what she wants without the limits of being concerned about what other people think because it is not something we tend to base our worth on. We're very lone wolfish but powerful in presence. I do believe we can own our feminity and use it to our advantage but without having to attempt to. We have the tendency to lean forward in our masculine energy a bit too much sometimes as we are very independent and are use to taking care of ourselves. So word to the wise for you other sigma females out there, it's ok to embrace the art of receiving and just being and feeling your femininity. Own it. And as the nature of being females, yes we prefer to have a dominant male partner. For those of you who are gay... That I don't know the answer to. Not that I have anything against gays cuz I don't. Either way, we just like to walk our own path. Off the beaten trail.
 
#35 · (Edited)
RiseOfSigma said:
do you have fantasies of submitting to a more dominant man?

I ask, not for disrespect, but rather I see females who are dominant in their physical space turn out to submissive in the sexual arena. They don't like the beta man, they want to be with a more dominant man. There is "art" there too.
Click to expand...
Sigma female, who is a 1w5 enneagram and a INFJ mbti. My big 5 results also indicate highly conscientious and openminded, while low neuroticism, and extroversion and moderate agreeableness.

The focus you have on dominance is amusing. The idea that anyone is truly submissive in a sexual encounter is laughable. You can not take what is given, and you do not control what has a rule. Both apply to every sexual interaction. You are looking for an illussion.

What you want to know is wether sigma females in general get "wild" or like to be spanked or put in weird positions. So what you want to know is offensive & immature and quite frankly irrelevant to WHY you want to know, which I would assume has something to do with a hoped for outcome if you were ever fortunate enough to align yourself with a woman of sigma caliber. It is irrelevant because my answer may not be her answer and its most likely extremes are answering a thread like this than the average.

Did I answer your question directly? No, because it is a stupid question & my specific answer is irrelevant to the likely origin of query.

✌
 
#36 ·
RiseOfSigma said:
I am trying to collect information of the elusive Sigma females. There was a Sigma male query that directed me to the the type 8 so I will start investigations here. I had created the site riseofsigma.com

My site is for Sigma male development, lone wolf type. Risk-takers and freedom-seekers.. the reason for this is from receiving a "shock" early on in their developmental path taking them away from the mainstream and affects their general disposition.

I have several females emailing me that they are Sigma females. I am curious to what a Sigma female would be like.

My theory is that sigma females have a high bent on the creative side. Instead of being cheerleaders, they gravitate towards arts, sciences.. but at the same time remaining true to the feminine core.

I think sigma females would be on the self-development side, they are not your HR secretary types, some probably run internet business or are striving to be at the apex of their niche careers. I think they are the types that use their sexiness to their advantage-- they weaponize their sexual value but at the same time there is a growing sadness in their state. They look for a stronger man, an intellectual probably, or a male who leads a less than conventional life for the duration of his finite time on earth.

What do you think?
Click to expand...
I agree with this for the most part. I am a Sigma female. Self-development is my life's focus. I don't think I weaponize my sexuality, but I certainly use it as a tool at times. I don't do it in a way that would ever compromise my character or tarnish my reputation, but I am well aware of it's power and how to control it to my advantage. It isn't so much that a man is strong, or a leader to attract me, it's important to me they are secure in who they are, not small minded, and are committed to using their life to improve the world around them in some way.
 
#37 ·
RiseOfSigma said:
I am trying to collect information of the elusive Sigma females. There was a Sigma male query that directed me to the the type 8 so I will start investigations here. I had created the site riseofsigma.com

My site is for Sigma male development, lone wolf type. Risk-takers and freedom-seekers.. the reason for this is from receiving a "shock" early on in their developmental path taking them away from the mainstream and affects their general disposition.

I have several females emailing me that they are Sigma females. I am curious to what a Sigma female would be like.

My theory is that sigma females have a high bent on the creative side. Instead of being cheerleaders, they gravitate towards arts, sciences.. but at the same time remaining true to the feminine core.

I think sigma females would be on the self-development side, they are not your HR secretary types, some probably run internet business or are striving to be at the apex of their niche careers. I think they are the types that use their sexiness to their advantage-- they weaponize their sexual value but at the same time there is a growing sadness in their state. They look for a stronger man, an intellectual probably, or a male who leads a less than conventional life for the duration of his finite time on earth.

What do you think?
Click to expand...
Personally for me as a sigma female, still a teen turning adult next year... My enneagram is type 8, mbti INTP. As a sigma female, there are different types of sigmas like me... I'm honestly the calm type and more on the perceiving side. I always go against the grain, yes I do make up and dress up but only for occasional events that needed so, but if I'm not going to do anything in particular I'd just be me nothing more or less than that. I'm known to be the silent rebel in school and at home, I don't follow the rules, I respect the rules. Just like some statements I also have low sex-drive, but if I'm with someone I am intimately with and in a relationship with, my sex drive would rocket high but of course it'll only depend on the mood and by the way I'm in a relationship with an alpha male.

I don't submit to anyone. Cause as a sigma, just like some other females in this forum, we're loners and loves solitude, music, arts, philosophy, and all those things that people take for granted most of the time and to remind we're against the wave trend people make, cause we make our own trends for ourselves exclusively.

Many would mistaken our concept of what others called we do as "submit" but it is not really submitting we're doing. If for example as a sigma, if I see you have more potential on handling the problem and if you are capable of doing so, I'd leave you to it and I'll just assist on the sidelines in short I got your back, you work on the limelight and I'll work on the shadows, it's that simple. (Taking the lead).

When it comes on the sexual part, I'd let my boyfriend alpha male to take the lead, but it doesn't mean I wouldn't be assertive too. I'd just leave him be cause he has something in mind and also I am experimental so I just play along.

I don't particularly have any fantasy of being dominated. I'm not just the type to always make the first move, cause I'm always going with flow but my guts are reserved for something more serious.
 
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