We just got it where it counts.
Actually people are turned on when a person makes acute observations about them. Then with INFP we provide that insight in a humorous way so as to avoid being misunderstood. When you make personal statements about someone, you have to frame it in a way that spares the person's feelings and allows them to laugh with you.
It's the fact that the first time you meet an INFP you get the impression that they have been thinking about you for awhile and that's definitely appealing.
Keep your enneagram and your subtypes for the scientists to worry about. This is about what makes people charming in general.

 

Uh oh, I posted in the wrong place. My learning curve leaves something to be desired and is not a personally charming trait.

 

I’ll adapt socially around whoever and can be pretty charismatic, idk about charming I think my sense of humor is too cynical for that lol. Self-awareness is huge for INFP development, like, you have to get to the point where you’re so amused by your own ideas that you don’t feel self-conscious at all, which can take awhile. I feel pretty confident in my ability to navigate the social spectrum, it’s just not really on my radar as any particular personal goal outside of general niceties.

 

I think former world chess champion Vishy Anand is an INFP instead of an INTJ as most people think. He is very well-liked in the chess community, which combined with the fact that he's been in the spotlight for several decades, suggests that his motivations were always genuine. I have also never seen him answer questions by framing it under a larger perspective, but I have seen him often make concrete analogies, which suggests Ne over Ni.

I don't speak from personal experience, so I might be going out on a limb here. My theory is that what makes INFPs INFPs is that they slowly and methodically establish what they believe in, moreso than any other type. This is what makes them appear as late-bloomers, but once properly matured they become very accomplished yet steadfast since they spend so much time and effort thinking things through beforehand.

 

Genuine, thoughtful, awkward and enigmatic. The tendency to understate their importance further adds to their mysteriousness. It's like they're trying to hide a treasure from everyone else by downplaying it. But by far the most attractive thing is the look on the eyes. Their feelings in all their intensity are permanently communicated through their eyes. Makes you want to dive in and see just what the fuck is going inside that head.

 

No way on God’s green earth am I charismatic or full of charm. I am quiet, never like to talk, always looking to exit any interaction, way way introverted, lacking social graces and I hate to kiss ass. You know morph myself to get along. I am NOT a chameleon. I do NOT change colors as the room or group changes. To think of me as charming or charismatic is LAUGHABLE.

Here’s my stats:

INFP on official MBTI
9/5 hybrid on enneagram with some 6
Not a 4 at all
Phlegmatic
INFj in Socionics

 

No way on God’s green earth am I charismatic or full of charm. I am quiet, never like to talk, always looking to exit any interaction, way way introverted, lacking social graces and I hate to kiss ass. You know morph myself to get along. I am NOT a chameleon. I do NOT change colors as the room or group changes. To think of me as charming or charismatic is LAUGHABLE.

Here’s my stats:

INFP on official MBTI
9/5 hybrid on enneagram with some 6
Not a 4 at all
Phlegmatic
INFj in Socionics

Exactly how I feel about myself: no charm or charisma; lacking social grace; hate, hate, hate to kiss ass; love animals, nature, books, people in that order. However, I am 4w5 4596. And although I am very introverted, I love talking to people. I, too am INFJ in socionics,

 

@CanaryBat

I do talk to husband and there does seem to be a good flow there of talking (well, probably not as much as he would like — he’s ISFJ) but it’s like my need to talk is satisfied with him. I have just one other friend who I pray doesn’t contact me. ;-)

Yes I have the 9,5,6 or what I mean is — I feel like it is me they are talking about in the descriptions. NOT 100% tho, on any description.

I have never tested 4. I’ve taken every test there is out there.

My strength is not in charm or charisma like many of my family members. I think my strength is not killing people or robbing banks. I see myself as a great investigator. I don’t cause a lot of drama and I’ve been called “nice”. But I could never be a politician or cult leader or celebrity or artist.

Are there charming, charismatic INFPs. Sure. But 100% count me out.