I'd hire Jemaine 8 days a week. We'd go sugalumping together.

 

I don't know why you would you pay for sex, especially with all these Tinder apps nowadays. But either paying or non paying - it's just so damn lazy. Can't people flirt or charm someone's heart anymore?

 

No, I only have sex with someone I love. Too many emotions and thoughts tied to sex to pay for it with a stranger.

 

Probably, if I was bored and alone.
No one bats an eyelid when you buy other pleasurable things.

 

Those thoughts have come but never been acted on. I am more on the sensual side and to engage in that fluff with a prostitute would be a bit inappropriate. Maybe an escort is more fitting since they are a bit more comprehensive in their services and physical sex does not have to be on the table. To me sex first happens to the mind and the body follows. Gross engagment in the body aspect is not so important to me, but the partner could want more. Thats the point in the exchange that would be undesireable for me and frankly would want them to disappear. But then using people solely for my pleasure even if i pay specifically for that service still doesnt sit right with me.

On appearance the idea of hooking up has been attractive but the more i go into it the more there is to shudder at. spontaneous encounters and gradual escalation feel more natural and prove to be more worthwhile.

 

I have social anxiety, so the answer is no. Even if i wanted to, i wouldn't been able to. If i got tomorrow the diagnosis of terminal cancer, and would only have a few months to live, i would still not hire a prostitute. I would prefer to die as a virgin. Sex to me needs to be meaningful. I don't think i'll easily have sex with someone. I might not have sex ever in my life, and that's fine. I'll only have sex with a person i truly love and could fully trust and who would accept my shortcomings. If that's not the case, it won't happen. The sex wouldn't be pleasureful anyway if those conditions weren't met.

I crave for a romantic relationship however hihi

 

Considering how many prostitutes are trafficked, and there is no way to determine who is a sex slave and who has free will, there is no really ethical way to say yes. Even if I were so inclined. Which I’m not.

 

That's definitely not true. I know several people who got into it willingly and they know the legitimate routes.
Edit: Moreover this is one of the main reasons to legalize it, it would help curtail trafficking to a very large extent.

 

No just no on so many moral grounds as people are not meant to be used like this even when being payed to do so. I don't agree with using dating apps as that has contributed to spiking STD rates in multiple nations like the US, AU, and NZ ect. There is even a new flesh eating STD and you don't want to google it especially before having a meal.

 

No. I can't imagine purchasing a prostitute unless I was just interested in having sex with someone's body, for their body. And I'm not.

It just sounds like a boring idea.

Not to mention, I would probably feel like they weren't actually interested in me, and were only having sex with me because I paid them. And that seems kind of pointless to me.

But I don't think it's terrible--I mean, there are probably exceptions, but that's just how I perceive it.

I'm not against prostitution in principle, I don't think--and I do think there's a place for sex therapists or whatever they are called--the ones that might also engage in physical stuff. But I wouldn't hire a prostitute. I also do think that it's important to consider that many sex workers are coerced, or they would not choose to do it were they to have other options. I also look down on people who don't care about people past being sexual objects, though I don't think all people who seek prostitutes are like this--but people should really think about the situation, especially where it's illegal or the person could be trafficked.

 

I have a lot to say here. Availing services of a prostitute is a subject I have been pondering over for last two years. That is because I am writing a play around it. I’d personally never do it. But then a lot of people do and when it is the working class labour who goes to a prostitute, can one really judge that man for visiting a prostitute for sexual needs? I don’t think one can. It is not even about drawing a line somewhere. It is the act of it and the dynamics of the interaction and intercourse (not just sexual) that would decide whether the exchange was ethical or not. I was taking the David Mamet dramatic writing master class and in an assignment by a random student I found a stereotypical depiction of a prostitute. Imo that is one of the most inhuman things I come across. ‘She’s is a whore’, ‘she’s just a whore’ - what does that even mean? Basic dehumanisation.

General rule would go that it’s wrong (because of the human trafficking and other general reasons how girls and women end up there) and yet the number of exceptions are not few. In India, housewives are sometimes harassed so much by the in-laws that they opt for the life of a prostitute. Most girls, however, are trafficked, kept hungry for days, are then raped, given medicines to increase the size of body parts, and finally put on the market. Sometimes poor families sell their daughters because the families are dying. Then they visit these daughters periodically. Hard to imagine something more harrowing. Another aspect is that the money does not fully go to the prostitute either. Some is taken by the pimps, some by the bosses or madams (older prostitutes who become establishment owners). They have multiple customers a day. To be with such an exhausted, exploited person and engage in sexual activity is beyond me. All you can do is provide sympathetic company.

That said, these women are wonderfully lively. So sharp, instinctive, and jovial. I have been meaning to go to a big city and get to know a few of them, learn their mannerism, behaviour patterns, conflicts and ways of dealing with conflicts etc. People are so much more than sexual entities. It is tragic that these women don’t get to experience sexual intimacy privately. Why would someone want to become more impoverished in this manner? On the other hand, I have read that these girls have boyfriends who are local thieves and pickpockets. Those can be very interesting stories to get to know.

 

Side note - I'm Swedish and it is illegal to pay for sex in Sweden. Prostitutes are not prosecuted, but those who pay them and profit from them are. There was even an attempt to make it a criminal offense for Swedes to pay for sex abroad, but it was abandoned at last minute as they decided it would be impractical/impossible to enforce legally. Instead, Sweden tries to convince other countries to likewise make it a criminal offence to pay for sex.

I suspect that sex robots, VR suits etc. will replace prostitutes in the future. I don't foresee a future where the demand will disappear ... but the solutions will probably be increasingly digital over analog.

 

Really? That's interesting... I thought Sweden was one of the most progressively liberal places in the world where prostitution would be like a no-brainer - and it's just regulated. It's funny how conservative Britain is more liberal on that area of all things.

I agree on the VR / Robots.

 

sometimes I joke with myself, saying I bought a muffin tin, jar of olives , dinner all at the dollar store, oh and a spouse too. i wish it was that easy.

with virtual reality games now on the market (I'm surprised it has been that slow--when there were movies about it more than 20 years ago?) perhaps we could go that way. it would also be safer and probably more satisfying.

 

I wouldn't, because the idea of turning someone on turns me on.
So that means that hiring a prostitute kind of ruins that for me, they would only be having sex with me because they were paid to. In fact, they may even find me repulsive. How I am supposed to pleasure a prostitute?

 

With normal courting become so dangerously risking ruining one's future, i foresee a great increase in prostitution demand.

Why. Because it no longer different, all the consent requirements have make everything literally transactional. Deal or no deal. Might as well hands over some money.

Sent sans PC

 

Please explain.

 

No, I need to feel safe and secure and trusting with someone before I'll have sex. Emotions have to be there.

 

free sex is so plentiful why stand in line

 

I would like to thank @Marvin the Dendroid for making the arguments I have long made and have grown tired of making.

Even among my fellow liberals it is rare to find men who have worked so hard to understand the female perspective here. Even among women I find a lot of arguments about sex work that I can’t support. “Choosing” to go into sex work to support a drug habit, or because it’s the only way for a woman to support her kids as a single mom, sort of illustrates the point that it’s a choice of desperation.

 

I would like to thank @Marvin the Dendroid for making the arguments I have long made and have grown tired of making.

Even among my fellow liberals it is rare to find men who have worked so hard to understand the female perspective here. Even among women I find a lot of arguments about sex work that I can’t support. “Choosing” to go into sex work to support a drug habit, or because it’s the only way for a woman to support her kids as a single mom, sort of illustrates the point that it’s a choice of desperation.

I agree with you that 'choosing' to be a prostitute because of a drug addiction isn't much of a choice. And, with my friend--I should add that she was also underage.

But I just think there are nuances, and it's complicated. Where I live, it's prohibited--and everything I've described happens still. @Marvin the Dendroid was talking about laws that penalize the men who seek sex, but not the prostitutes.

I actually think this makes a lot of sense. But it is much easier to find a prostitute than a man who's soliciting.

And at least, imo, in the cases of the young, poor women that walk the streets--I think the men who come up and solicit are very much to blame. At least, especially, in the situation of my friend--who was both underage and addicted to drugs. She legally wasn't able to consent, and yet fully adult men who supposedly have fully mature brains went after her.

I remember the time vividly, because we'd both run away from home. And I know from my own experience, at the time, that I was solicited by people just for appearing to be someone who was on the streets.

I remember I would walk by this particular fish and chips shop, and it seemed so amazing that people could eat there, and then a man in probably his late fifties approached me, offering me a couple cans of dog food for my dog. He asked me if I wanted to work for him, cleaning his boat. I said I would think about it, so we went to his yacht club and walked out to the yacht to show it to me.

But then, he asked me if I 'play for pay,' and I think I asked him what that meant, and told him no. He said something about how he likes to go visit the islands out around there, and his girlfriend and he like to have an additional partner to go, and honestly that sounded the most interesting, to be able to go. I still told him no, though obviously the idea of sailing in a yacht, having food...being able to explore somewhere new...was appealing, compared to having to go back to just living on the street of the city.

Anyway--dude was probably going to murder me if I did. But then he asked me again, after I told him no--he just wanted to jerk off next to me, even if I was fully clothed. I still said no. I thought it was so stupid for this rich dude with anything and everything anyone could want, is going around finding teenage girls who are homeless to try to pay them for sex.

It's people like that who should be penalized for prostitution laws. I suppose I 'saved' him from falling to such lows though (at least with me--I doubt I was the first person he's ever done that whole thing with and who knows--maybe the others were on the bottom of the Sound.)

It will always stick in my mind how frivolous and misguided people can be--a man with so much more than other people, has to be kept from doing something wrong by a teenage girl on the street refusing his requests for prostitution.

That memory is probably one of most poignant (to me--I explained it horribly, but how I remember it) images of how money doesn't equate to social value or virtue--how those with more money do not have more virtue, and how capitalism doesn't work in such a way that the market follows social values--or else it's a symptom of society having very sick values (or both).

With my other friend, well--you could call it desperation. But there are people who choose to be prostitutes who have other choices. And I should specify it was a rare occasion--when the offer was right. It wasn't like a regular job. It was supplemental.

And the men who visited the strip clubs and escort services were probably (hopefully) a slightly different type of man than who goes and looks for people in desperate situations, to offer them money for sex (like poor teenage girls going about their lives).

I'll never be able to afford to buy a house where I grew up, especially as a single mother. My friend was able to provide for her daughter in ways many people cannot.

And that, imo, shows there is more wrong with the low wages women often make in traditionally female-dominated work, combined with the hardship of motherhood, combined with the cost of housing and rent. So imo that is more indicative of a problem with our society, and the opportunities that people have, and the safety nets.

I don't think it can be solved by harsher laws against prostitutes, though I certainly felt resentful at times that I never chose to pursue anything related to adult entertainment, just like many women who work hard their whole lives, and still end up in difficult place.

But this is a social problem--not the fault of prostitution. And it's the people who choose to spend their money on teenage girls who have addictions, or no food or safe place to rest who are at fault.

Everything I've described has gone on in places where prostitution is illegal, and the prostitute could be arrested.


(sorry it's kind of ranty, but I haven't had my coffee)

I guess my point is that poor people have to make very difficult choices every day. Prostitution might be one, but it's hardly the only one.

The solution, imo, is for society to work towards egalitarianism and against poverty--that is the only way that desperation will be less of a driving factor.

Edit: I also found this article about teen trafficking. https://www.npr.org/2010/12/06/131757019/youth-radio-trafficked-teen-girls-describe-life-in-the-game

And I recently heard about a county that cracked down on human trafficking, where the Sheriff basically said he felt like the biggest monsters in the whole thing were the men who pay to exploit this kind of human misery. Apparently trafficking has gone up dramatically lately where I live. Apparently part of it might be related to resources for homeland security being more focused on swooping in on factories to get illegal immigrants that are abiding by the law (for higher numbers of deportations), rather than focusing on criminal activity and trafficking of immigrants.

But I guess I am divided about prostitution--my friend who bought the house after working in adult industries was actually the mother of another high school friend.

So I guess I see a big difference between the examples I talked about (underage soliciting) and also in the news article (with the forced sex slavery), and an adult woman who worked in places that did run legally (like stripping and escort businesses), and was able to buy a house for herself and her daughter.

 

idk. if i had lots of money and wanted sex. it might be fun to hire a really hot guy who didn't expect anything from me except payment. i mean, it'd be giving someone work right? so it'd be like a good deed too. of course i don't think i could do it with just any old guy. he'd have to be someone i liked. like a total stranger just because i liked his looks would probably be out of the question. too impersonal.

 

No, STDs, chance of being robbed or having your things stolen by a prostitute and way too expensive for what a less than an hour of ejnoyment, I can have a good time for much longer with that prices.

As for prostitution, their choice to make money in such way, in fact it may be pragmatic and resonable decision to pursue such job if you don't have other prospects or you are good looking and want earn easy and good money. Sex sells after all.

 

Here's an interesting article--it also talks about Sweden criminalizing the purchase but not the sale, though only a bit. It also talks about when it's legal and the problems that seemed to come with that.

https://www.irishtimes.com/news/a-p...prostitute-s-life-whether-it-hurts-the-woman-or-not-the-men-don-t-care-1.644384

I've never lived anywhere prostitution was legal, so I've not seen it firsthand. Seems like Sweden took an interesting moderate approach.

It seems to be focusing on the people who drive the industry--which are the men who are paying for it. I think this group tends to slip by with little consequence, in places where prostitution is fully illegal, since it's way easier to catch a prostitute than the men who pay them or solicit women and girls for sex acts. I'm glad to learn about different approaches.

 

I'd hire a prostitute and then have her perform entirely non-sexual services. Keeping my residence clean, buying groceries, keeping track of my finances, etc. :laughing: Why not troll her?

 

Ok, let's talk about the issues of sex-for-hire vs normal workplace rules.

"The customer is always right" is not quite true. There are things customers cannot do. They cannot disrupt your establishment. They cannot ask for anything illegal. But otherwise, we need to serve all customers. It does not matter if they are not nice, doesn't matter if we disagree with their values, doesn't matter if we think they are rude or uncouth or slovenly. If we are a business with something for sale, we must sell to all comers or run afoul of anti-discrimination laws. This is necessary to keep the system running smoothly; all must be able to participate.

In sexual situations, we assume that both parties have a right to ask for what they want. We assume that each party has the ability to say "no" at any point in the "transaction" and walk away. We assume that each party has a right to say how and when and where they feel like having sex. Having agreed to such a "transaction" in the past does not mean we agree to such a "transaction" forevermore.

How on earth does one reconcile the two descriptions above and make prostitution legal or morally ok? The first set of rules naturally precludes the second, and vice-versa.

If I pay a restaurant for a meal, they can't come back out and say "I''m sorry, the cook has a headache and has changed his mind." They can't say "You smell funny and the waiter does not want to serve you." They can't say "You know, we had fish on the menu and the place has served fish before but today the place just is not in the mood for fish." If after paying something happens that means they can't provide what you paid for, you would have to get a refund.

So for prostitution to be legal and follow normal rules of our society, the prostitute would have to be able to dictate all the terms of the sexual transaction. And if we did that... well maybe no one would pay for sex. Because let's imagine a world where the person paying for sex can expect to hear:

"You aren't very good at this; I certainly did not have an orgasm."
"I can't continue, your hygiene really needs some improvement"
"You remind me too much of my Dad and we had a difficult relationship. I just can't"
"I'm sorry, that position is uncomfortable for me"
"I'm not into bald guys"
"I know I promised we'd have sex but I'm really worried about my kid's cough and I don't think it's going to happen"

And so on.

You see the problems there? The rules of being a customer and the rules of being a sex partner are not compatible. At least not with our modern understandings of what is involved with being a sex partner.

 

Hire a prostitute?

Nah. I'm too much of a pushover to be a pimp.

 

Yes, I have and will continue too. My luck on tinder and bumble are terrible... I’m a handsome guy, dating apps just don’t work well for me. Girls I’ve spoken to hardly reply.

 

 

...is always an option.

 

@marvinthedendroid lollll need to see that movie already. All I can say is I always end up exhausting that option, then it’s time for the real deal Holyfield. It’s not for everyone, and I’m glad = less mileage on these hoez

 

@marvin thedendroid lollll need to see that movie already. All I can say is I always end up exhausting that option, then it’s time for the real deal Holyfield. It’s not for everyone, and I’m glad = less mileage on these hoez

Les hoez happy with you then?