Makes you go or delve 'inside your head' even more apparently being one of those.

 

I am sorry to hear that this was the experience you had growing up. I hope you are taking care of yourself and that you can put some distance behind the people who mistreated you.
:welcome: we are mostly friendly in here.
To answer your question, I think neuroticism is another common side effect of trauma. Not necessarily restricted to infp's though. I would guess because of the dominant fi function, they might obsessively contemplate on the abuse.
My self I do revisit past regrets often and try to imagine what I could have done differently. (it is a pointless exercise really)

 

They often use it as a crutch and an emotional disability card.

At worst.

At best they just go through life achieving and not a word about what they went though except only the important people in their lives.

In between, I see them going back to it like a drug. Like they feed off their pain. And feed off the pity they recieve.

:sadcloud:

 

It doesn't sound like you deal with the abuse/trauma by shitting on other people who show vulnerability, and I think that's great.

I think that INFP, like other types, can grow wiser from processing experiences of abuse and trauma. It can lead to being more understanding and sensitive to others, or you could also make efforts to help avoid causing more/help relieve the suffering that does happen in the world. I have also seen some INFPs that learn great insights into self-care, and can share those with others.

INFPs that gain insights into their own self-care and happiness have always been really inspiring to me, and that's something I've noticed with the INFPs I know irl, and I can also think of inspiring ideas I've read from people I've never seen in person.

But ultimately, I would say that the INFPs I've known have grown stronger with a deeper understanding, and have come to their own creative solutions and insights that they can now offer the rest of the world. It doesn't always happen in the most obvious way (like for sure there is a component of self-reflection that might appear self-absorbed to some, but the outcome can be unique insight that others find helpful).

One INFP I know, and I can't say what they might have gone through if anything (I know it's not very easy to talk about it) was super passionate about eastern medicine as well as some more esoteric stuff (so spent years in education and training), and eventually ended up volunteering for AIDS patients, to give them free sessions/therapy. The experience was enriching for everyone involved because INFP grew a deeper understanding of people who are in a difficult situation, was able to help, and also to do something they were passionate about. So everyone benefited.

Not to say that they never struggle--they absolutely do, and I think self-care and likely finding someone trustworthy to talk about it with (maybe a good counselor) is super important, as is recognizing when one is struggling a lot and needs to ask for a little help. Because it can definitely happen to an INFP that they don't know how to cope, or aren't coming up with the right solutions they need, and can benefit from insight from others.

But in general, I would say INFPs I've known have ended up with unique and valuable insights into not only their own humanity, but also others. And that they have also pioneered self-care--maybe radical self-care (that, again, others can learn from).

I don't want to paint an overly rosey image of trauma experience though--for sure there's a shadow when there is a light. And sometimes knowing that darkness also allows someone to create a stronger light.

I don't think it's easy for anyone to deal with trauma/abuse, regardless of mbti type. I've had a lot of negative ways of coping at different times in my life, and I don't feel like talking about it, but I am constantly trying to find ways that aren't destructive to myself or others. Opening up and asking for help, or at least talking with a trusted friend can help. Noticing inspiring people and trying to learn from them can help. Eh--idk.

 

In no way, am I a therapist, or mental health professional, but my guess is it runs the gamut, of human coping and reactions. Suppose that goes for all types. Some crumble and some get stronger. One size doesn't fit all.

I knew a lady at work who used to write in her journal, never talked about it but then... on the flip-side you have people writing about it and selling the book on the NYT bestseller list. It depends.

 

I have a close INFP friend who has been traumatized and he for the most part keeps so much pain inside, like he's Atlas holding up the world, its really heavy for him. He has severe trust issues and anxiety. He's been severely pessimistic and cynical and stressed, but lately he seems to be getting a little better.He says he is getting "used" to things causing him stress and bad things happening, and seems to be more stable than he was before.

 

This is what the real world is like for a lot of people and it is so frustrating when the normies don't understand that life is not all peaches and cream. The very best thing you can do is get away somewhere and start fresh while at the same time finding the support that you need in order to heal then you can be so much more happier with your life. This is to an extent the sort of hell that my Mom and partly myself went through growing up so I know what it is like to be in those shoes minus the rape.

 

I am a victim of abuse as well, and i guess how i cope with some feelings is i mentally have a safe space... like you said you daydream a lot. I also take it a step further and create different storylines for myself