Hi. I'm an INFJ, but I am a completely different INFJ that you just described. In the circumstances in which I grew up, I learned to be self reliant, and ambitious. I bring that into my relationships as well. I have a mind that creates new plans every day, and I may seem quiet/distance from first talking to me, but when I truly take you as someone who's worth sharing my world with, you'll be surprised. I will take you to the most incredible adventures on the spot throughout the area, best restaurants that are known for their incredible food(I need to constantly keep changing), check out new concerts, so much more. Basically my entire existence is based on the fact that I truly want to get the most out of life as I can, and grow as much as possible in my years in this world, and I always show it with those I care about. I am closed off from feelings verbally, but my language that I use with my body, my hands, provides so much more affection. Gently stroking my SO's face, and teasefully playing and smiling as we makeout..., I just prefer it this way.

I haven't read much of the ENTP, but I know you guys are supposed to be my match as well. I have a world of imagination, and possiblities, and even in my relationships, I am very independent, prefer to not see my significant other more than 1-2 days a week, but when those days come.... You better believe those days are dynamic. I can write an entire novel of all the stuff my mind provides, but trust me, for those who know me, I always change their life for the better for my friends. If it's debating about the existence of life and soul, philosophy, critizicing the world, showing you things that are original, laughing at the most stupidest shit ever(i'm random as fuck when I am happy, but I can make people laugh until they tear up and can't take it anymore), coming up with new business ideas, observing the beauties of the world, or just chilling back and listening to our favorite music.

Yeah.... it all depends on who you meet. I know what I can provide, but that's a secret to only those who I feel are well aware of the world, are intelligent, understand that there's so much more than just partying and drinking, and that have real goals, and dreams. Show me that, and i'll show you a side that will always bring something new to the table every day.

 

I know what the ideal ENTP partner is supposed to look like, but quite honestly I would prefer someone more like me. Probably not another ENTP though...that could be a disaster.
Sensitivity and introverted-ness is fine, but I like energy and spontaneous decisions.
Although, that could just be my lack of dating talking, because I could change my mind. After all, we do have the energy covered :crazy:

 

Female ENTP here. My only problem with the male INFJ is that there aren't more of them.

Based on the INFJs that I've known, I think that I could be happy dating this type. Our conversations go beyond the usual witty banter and become this fantastic Ni/Ne imagination wordplay wonderspace. Can't seem to get enough. As for the sensitivity, I think perhaps OP has been around mistyped ISFJs because the INFJs that I know (both male and female) downplay their caring. Like their Fe is all subtle and adorable, and males especially get blushy when it is displayed too openly. I think that discovering just how deeply they care about things and people and having the ENTP function tools to notice even when they try to hide it only makes the type more attractive.

 

The only way for an INFJ to have a good ENTP match is to tune down his emotions.

 

quoted for truth

 

l find male INFP's to be more laidback, and interestingly female INFJs to be a bit more laidback than female INFP's.

There's been some NF and gender discussion threads before about how it does seem to manifest differently.

 

You know an INFJ male? Impossible. Such creatures do not exist.

 

I'm a figment of your imagination.

In all honesty, I have a crush on an ENTP girl I know. However a serious relationship wouldn't work. ENTPs can be too flaky for me. I hear back from them on a very irregular basis, which can be quite irritating and draining on me. Although when I do have their attention, it's an all natural alternative to energy drinks. ENTP girls just seem to love me for some reason.

I think it's fair to say every INFJ needs their own favorite ENTP.

 

I haven't met any real male INFJs. But when I read their description I see nothing that I'm attracted to. I think I'd feel like I was walking on thin ice throughout our whole interaction. Anything I say may inadvetently hurt their feelings.

 

I think I'd feel like I was walking on thin ice throughout our whole interaction. Anything I say may inadvetently hurt their feelings.

That's a bit exaggerated. We INFJs are sensitive but very open minded to discussion and not naive when it comes to human nature.
If by "hurting their feelings" you mean touching their ego, then I think it's common to any type of men, including ENTPs

I have fallen for ENTPs and there are others I really didn't like at all (although they liked me). What is supposed to attract us in this "match" is also what can get on our nerves. And in your case, I'd guess it would be sensitivity, depth, their sense of psychology, their mystery.
I love ENTP's crazy ideas and open mindedness, but when it turns to bullshitting and rudeness, I hate it!

 

I have met a few ENTP women and every time it has been intuitive firework. I simply adore their quick mindedness and femme fatale attitude. Is anybody familiar with the tv serie Twin Peaks, ENTP girl Audrey Horne has a very soft spot on her heart for INFJ Dale Cooper, it's a great example of the heights of intelligence and quirkiness I always seem to find in interactions with ENTP people.

 

I know an INFJ, and although I like him a lot, and I used to consider him a possibility for something more, I don't think this is happening. I can't imagine this working on a long ride. They're amazing and you can learn so much from them and there's some form of attraction, but I just can't imagine it lasting. I don't feel like myself while with him. I care, and thus I reflect it on my behavior and am too indirect or too direct and in the end get confused with myself. And he's so entitled to his opinions, and generally has good arguments to back them up, but he doesn't say it. He wants me to figure it out. And it just gets annoying trying to put myself in his skin and understand him... There's definitely attraction, but I wouldn't give it a chance. And I wouldn't give it a chance, because I'd end up hurting them one way or another and benefiting from the relationship way more than they do.

So, yeah, INTJs ftw. ENTJs can pass. Others.. meh. I have yet to meet another ENTP irl, tho.

 

One thing l liked about INTJ was just incredibly low maintenance. No reactionary BS. None.

lt might have looked like we hated each other to some people, but that was just how it was from the second we met. Definitely an inherent connection there and we both knew we didn't need to show that we cared.

He had some drawbacks related to showing expression, though, that could sometimes honestly be a little boring. But mostly he just said exactly what he meant, and there was little need to ''express'' it.

 

Okay, so a little late, but I have a plethora of experience with infj men. They are chameleons, sure, but as a an entp female who is quite capable of navigating the social scene and good at typing, I run into quite a few of them. Know how to spot them better than the female, actually. Anyway, I am "dating" one at the moment, who seems to be in total infj denial, but likes me because I'm not like the rest of the "stupid, ditzy girls, and my thoughts are different". God, so eloquent, his words make me melt... Smh. Guess that's my Job.

So this is the way I think about it. It's very role reversal, but I have to keep myself in check not to completely lose my female traits, my sensitivity, and depth, in lieu of pursuing the quintessential Tony Stark persona, as most INFJs seem to love. So, its quite a balancing act. Because I want to let them be men. Or, at least be confident that they can protect me, etc. so I don't want to completely go full-throttle logical/masculine like I have a tendency to do...

Its a very complex thing, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

 

I think my ideal ENTP would have a lot of the Tony Stark thing going on publicly, but would be more gooey with me . My guess is that this appeals to me because of the trust required for them to feel comfortable enough for that. It makes my significance to them obvious when their words might not.

However, i have never been romantically involved with an ENTP, so perhaps this works only in theory.

 

I'm an ENTP woman recently married to an INFJ man. We always had this weird attraction towards each other. I also never in a million years thought i would end up with him, but the mysterious chemistry between us was just undeniable. We'd just get each other. Although there are many times i feel like he's too introverted, constantly questioning my intentions, and I think he stresses out WAY too much, however, with every argument or minor fights we've had, they've always been constructive, and we always apologize and make amends as soon as possible--We absolutely cannot stand conflict between us.

I've learned to give him his space, and he's learned to try new things and open up with me. I don't get along with too many people, but no one has ever understood me so intuitively as my INFJ husband has! So for those out there contemplating pairing up with a ENTP/INFJ- DO IT! It's beautiful harmony.

Are there any other ENTP's married to INFJ's out there? If so, i'm curious to know how and what obstacles have you had to overcome together as a couple?

 

Well, maybe l reconsidered.

With James Spader often typed as ENFJ or INFJ by people, l can see how an lNFJ male would be the kind of dynamic l like.

l'd agree that some can seem high-strung and limbic which l don't find attractive at all, but they're probably just insecure.

l think what l look for is for a basically equal partnership, l just don't want to be dominant. So maybe a male INFJ isn't technically submissive just because he's the ''nurturer''.

 

Well, maybe l reconsidered.

With James Spader often typed as ENFJ or INFJ by people, l can see how an lNFJ male would be the kind of dynamic l like.

A very good example is Wilson in House. (And house a very good example of an ENTP). My boyfriend and I find their relationship (although on a friendship level) so representative that we watch it just for a good laugh.

 

You're not important enough to them to show you their better parts. We don't want a lot of people in our lives so we can put on a front to keep people away. Try having 1 on 1 conversations if they give you the chance, or just catch them by surprise...our Fe will kick in anyhow.

 

for my own part, it's less them not being important enough, and more it just not occurring to me how/why/or in what way to show the rest of me

 

I actually met an INFJ male 2 weeks ago and we went on 3 dates before we decided to part ways.

We had an immediate physical spark, but the conversation...was very much like walking on eggshells for me. He was very serious and stressed out and he refused to tell me about it so we just sat in stifling silence sometimes. It felt like I couldn't breathe at some points because I was scared to say something too light-hearted and I was scared to say something too serious.

So in conclusion, he's a great guy (24 years old), but took himself way too seriously for my taste.

 

Someone hand me an INFJ guy out for testing purposes, so I can write a report ^^

 

Yes please get out there and report back! He was a seriously hot guy...:winky::winky:

 

My experiences, it's either a great match or the worst idea ever.

My husband is an INFJ and I'd marry him again in a heartbeat. (Speaking of which... I've got to propose again in two months time, for some reason getting asked makes mine happy.) I also have two ex boyfriend INFJs who drove me up the damn wall with their inability to get anything done and their fluffiness. Should've learned my lesson the first time around, but didn't. And I should mention that I don't think male INFJs are undateable, just that a certain subsection is. There's got to be a balance.

I like cranky INFJs who are heavier on Ti usage and all grown up, by which I mean good at getting things done... although this means by their rules, at their pace, and driven by some mystical visionary thing that I cannot understand at all. That's all cool though. My husband is also one of the most self contained, self sufficient people I've had the pleasure of knowing, and I really like how socially competent he is. Not taking on too much of other people's feelings is I think a mature INFJ thing-- he's very aware of what's going on around himself, but although he empathises to a degree it doesn't usually get to him at his own expense. He's really centered and kind, which I dig. And cranky in an "I know how the world should be and this isn't it, let's change things around" kind of way.

Also, no way is this dude socially submissive. He's easygoing, but he doesn't bow to anyone, especially to people who he thinks are in the wrong. As I've noticed... ask me about the altercation where some idiot driver came close to hitting his bicycle and he stopped in the middle of the street, walked to the driver side window and nearly pulled this dude out through it. I told him afterwards that I prefer he not cycle as long as there are drivers unfamiliar with traffic rules on the road.

 

And I should mention that I don't think male INFJs are undateable, just that a certain subsection is. There's got to be a balance.

IMHO male INFJ's often have a lot of personal growth to get through before they're truly long term material. Societal gender roles and male INFJ's often butt heads, and we come out on the losing end.

If you get one who is a decent distance along their path, you're in for a treat.. but if not, they're kind of a train wreck waiting to happen...

 

I'll add some more about the awesomeness of my INFJ, I'm tipsy and very happy with it.

Let's see. Dude also cleans up really well and is in touch with his sensitive side... it just doesn't take over everything. I like men who notice they have feelings and don't feel the need to self censor or make everything about them. And his sense of humour can take just about everything I throw at him. He takes longer to process things in depth, but our verbal sparring matches over random things are a source of continuous joy to me-- he thinks fast on his feet in these situations and he's hilariously offensive without crossing over to small mindedness or meanness.

 

After becoming aware of mbti a couple of months ago I've been sizing people up and vaguely guessing what their type would be. Seeing as INFJ's are so rare, I met my first, who was a guy.
I was working with two other guys and the INFJ was called in to do a paint job. I do a bit of everything of course, and being in the same place we all automatically gel together, and I noticed almost straight away there was something different about him.
He likes socialising, but every now and then, he likes to eject from it. I do this occasionally with the two other guys but not as frequently. I hang around them quietly, chipping in every now and then, while he remains subtly distant. He doesn't enjoy being the centre of attention.
We get on very well and laugh at each other. He's an excellent genuine listener. He speaks quietly and jumps in with witty one liners with all of us. He's interested in everything I have to say, is helpful, and very intelligent.
One of the guys I work with decided to approach him and say something like "Jesus do you say anything?". I knew straight away that this wasn't a good call. The rest is too long to describe, but it's as if there's some sort of vibe with us that's smashing.
Imagine us as different sides on a weighing scale. When one side leans one way, the other side is always level.

 

Just like every other type, maturation tends to wise up the dominate functions. Early on, Infjs are oversensitive and give too much of a shit about things that really are of no practical concern. Those things are important for us though, as there is a lot going on in that learning process. Later on we turn out very resilient and controlled people because of it, even if we still manage to retain a soft spot. I'm not totally sure what process Entps go through but I'm hoping its the opposite of Bill Maher who seems like a stunted Entp.

 

I don't think ENTP females are real. I haven't met one in real life yet!!! WHERE ARE THEY?!?!?!?

 

...i have a suspicion i might have met one.

 

I've never met a male INFJ (or someone that I suspected was an INFJ). I've met a couple of ENFJs and we've butted heads over competing ideologies / lifestyles.

I like the idea of the INFJ as a match because they are more emotionally expressive (and sometimes emotional validation is very nice), they are motivated and organized (they are Js, after all), and traditional gender roles are less likely to have influenced their preferences in women (they are Ns, after all).

I dislike the idea of the INFJ as a match because I am not very good at giving others emotional validation (an NF can be emotionally needy) and I still subscribe to some standard of gender roles. I'm more attracted to a man who is motivated by ideas/knowledge (i.e. NT stuff) or money and conquest (i.e. typical provider stuff) than by ideals and feels.

I suppose the manliest version of an INFJ I can think of is Batman, which isn't too shabby.