You might find this article helpful in deciding whether you are INTJ or INFJ:
personalitycafe.com/articles/28997-explaining-ti-fi-types.html

INTJs use TeFi as their decision making functions - INFJs use FeTi

 

Confusion between whether a person is INTJ or INFJ is normal, it is difficult to type an INFJ because we have so much of a barrier and so many layers to our persons. I myself could of been classified as an INTJ for several years because I was in a very tumultuous part of my life and emotions were a pain to me, I have also heard similar situations from other INFJs.

Much of your description I can identify with specifically the control and the emotion vs. logic part. As a teenager in a situation such as yours, it is difficult to know for sure. People change, especially at that stage in life and there is so much for one to deal with and to figure out.

Do not give much heed to the types, they are useful but do not take them too seriously or too far. What is more important is knowing who oneself is because we are people and we cannot be put into a box 100% of this type or that. You will learn more by examining who you are and pondering on yourself than you will on the types. They are a useful tool but not an end all. It can get you started on delving into the questions of who you are that need to be answered and it can explain some, but not all of your personality. All of your questions of who you are, they are already within your grasp within your own person. Look at personality theory as an aid to figure some things out. You probably know this but I have to say it because it is a dangerous pitfall.

 

As I understand it, you are prone to act impulsively when under stress...

Someone more knowledgable might correct me, but that would seem to me to suggest that Fi might be your tertiary function, thus INTJ.

As for me (INFJ) I often get buried in unimportant details and micromanaging when stressed out - unless simply withdrawing of course - and I understand that as typical for INFJ.

But I'm new to this, so I might be wrong here.

 

And also: If you are still in your teens, it is completely normal for your auxiliary function to be still developing...

 

For now I'm considering myself a T/F hybrid. Seems like a case of the Forer effect: the more I research, the more I appear to share traits from both functions... Taking into account penchan's post I've probably got some more self-discovery to go before I lose the 'x'.

 

That you feel like an T/F hybrid is simply indicative that your logical and feeling functions are close together. This is the case of INTJs and INFJs.
INTJ functional order listed from dominant to inferior - Ni Te Fi Se
INFJ functional order listed from dominant to inferior - Ni Fe Ti Se
As you case see logical and feeling functions in both types are close together. In some people the tertiary function is very weakly developed. In others it can be exercised almost as often as auxiliary function. This is the T/F flip that you are sensing in yourself.

However, this does not mean that you are INTJ/INFJ hybrid as you cannot easily flip between TeFi and FeTi in decision making. INTJs have very weak sense of Fe. INFJs have very weak sense of Te. You either use extraverted logic and introverted feeling, or you use introverted logic and extraverted feeling. Determining which is the case for you will lead you to your natural type.

 

You sound a LOT like me, so I think you're an INTJ.

 

However, this does not mean that you are INTJ/INFJ hybrid as you cannot easily flip between TeFi and FeTi in decision making. INTJs have very weak sense of Fe. INFJs have very weak sense of Te. You either use extraverted logic and introverted feeling, or you use introverted logic and extraverted feeling. Determining which is the case for you will lead you to your natural type.

*Sigh* Yes, but this does not help in identifying which one I actually am, and this is not as easy as suggested. I'm equally likely to chose whether I should base my decisions on feeling or thinking depending on the circumstances and nature of the choice. Different situations require different forms of problem solving. I believe for the majority of the time, emotion is one essential consideration when making decisions, and therefore, I usually include it as a factor during my logical weighing -I will see how each option fulfills different criteria-. However, the strength of my emotions makes it confusing, because often they are intense and I have to give them more consideration for the sake of my mental health.

I think I shall follow this advice for now:

Do not give much heed to the types, they are useful but do not take them too seriously or too far. What is more important is knowing who oneself is because we are people and we cannot be put into a box 100% of this type or that. You will learn more by examining who you are and pondering on yourself than you will on the types.

 

I hoped that article that I liked about Fi and Ti would help you realize with one you are. For me at least it was very clear that I align my emotions to the outside, that my feelings are objective. I don't really "feel for myself" but things like outside conflict between people really disturbs me. At the same time I see my INTJ father become really disturbed by people doing things he considers illogical by outside standard. For example getting car tickets or not paying bills on time. I theoretically know this stuff is bad to do but it doesn't provoke as strong a reaction in me as it does in him, because he orients by extraverted logic. My logic is introverted that says "screw what's logical by outside standard I will think/do as I please". But I cannot feel as I please. So if you can determine which part of you is aligned with outside world - feeling or thinking - it will help you establish if you are INTJ or INFJ.

May be just reading more about expressions of Te and Fe will help: Function Attitude

 

Ahh... thank you. That was enlightening. According to the criteria in this website, I'm definitely not an INFJ.