Not really. But it is stupid to act like someone who you are not, there are always people with who you don't get along with. (And insecurity on their side might be one of the reasons). There are not enough people who compliment people, so just stay true to yourself. If you compliment people, because you are really happy for them, then there is nothing fake about it.

I don't think it is necessarily an ENFP thing, more like a positive, kind and wise people thing.

 

No can't say I've ever had this problem. In fact I've had quite a few people comment on how authentic I am, most recently from some INFPs. Which is a huge compliment coming from an INFP.

 

i've never gotten that because i genuinely like hanging out and socialising with people and i dun think anybody thinks i'm actually doing it for the attention.

maybe tone down on the people-pleasing cuz enfps have a tendency to do that (myself included)

 

i've never gotten that because i genuinely like hanging out and socialising with people and i dun think anybody thinks i'm actually doing it for the attention.

maybe tone down on the people-pleasing cuz enfps have a tendency to do that (myself included)

 

I don't go out that much but when I do people who know me know that I can be fun to be a round. It's just natural for me to be nice to people in general as long as they're nice to me.

 

I could care less if someone thinks I'm being fake or not. I know I'm not fake. I treat life organically, let things unfold. I never have a plan, I just respond authentically in every situation. So, I don't care what someone else thinks of me. I'm true and honest as much as I can be.

 

I know many ENFPs, some are my best friends but if i'm being honest, they're the most dramatic people I've met. One ENFP I knew lied and exaggerated every little detail. They're fun people but I don't want to have to hear about how they're cat almost died from a hair ball for the next 2 months lmao.

 

I tend to give compliments a lot ( and my compliments are always sincere and genuine ) somehow it got perceived as fake by outsider at school /parties ( whom I've never talked to )
However nobody I know (including my acquaintances ) have ever called me fake



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Isn't Fi suppose to be all about authenticity?

 

Can't relate to this. I usually hear the opposite that people love how real I keep it. Maybe it's because I have a pretty good balance of compliments and criticisms (but in the friendliest way possible).

 

I have a close friend who I suspect is an ENFP and she compliments her friends and strangers *constantly*. I don't ever see her as being fake - instead I admire her and try to be more like her in that way. I'm naturally shy/reserved around strangers (I don't want to invade their personal space by complimenting them) but seeing how my friend makes people light up has really encouraged me to come out of my shell a little more.

 

One of my closest friends is an ENFP and qualifying her as "fake" couldn't be further from the truth. She is enthusiastic and people oriented but her strongest trait is undeniably honesty. I think that she is maybe sometimes too welcoming and then attract ill-intentioned people who could then be the ones doing all the badmouthing...

 

Sometimes I feel fake, to be honest. Especially on my main blog on Tumblr. I pretty hide a lot of my actual opinions when it comes to certain social justice issues, and I have people with opposing opinions (that also really dislike people with opinions like mine) following me. I just keep a neutral image, and it makes me feel kind of fake, huh.

 

LOL...no. I've been told to tone down being myself. My reaction to that was

 

Have I ever had that issue? No, but then I've always been a little more reserved, I haven't really been an enfp for very long- real shock when i tested over and over and repeatedly got enfp recently- I hardly ever compliment people if i'm honest (worst extroverted feeler ever) when i do compliment people its usually quite awkward and dabbly, so i dont think people think im faking it. Maybe it is just your friend, who knows?

 

I had an aquatience who was an ENFP, he did seem fake, Im not even sure of his real name as I didnt see his Birth Certificate.

All he did was compliment everyone.
If I had any doubts he would feed me BS, then when I pointed out the reality of the siituation he would freak out saying that I was being logical.

If any activities were happening he would just go along, but never have any actual interest, he was more interested in manipulating people to liking him than the actual activity.

Then he just supplicates, he agree's with everyone and just does what they want to do to try and make them happy.

For someone who is keen on "Being Himself", he seemed quite hollow.

There was no real person there, the worst thing was he could elicit emotions, but afterward sit felt like I had been covered in slime,

Anyway instead of whining I cut him off. Best thing I have ever done.

 

I do think NFP can come across as being fake and I'll tell you why. We live in a world that socialism is encouraged, group think, making everyone around us feel good. To an NFP this is sometimes difficult, because we don't want to conform to socialism, however because it is expected of us we will at times go with the flow. We know we're being fake and it makes us cringe, however because it is most acceptable sometimes It's better for the group, or for our situation to play along. If not we are seen as an outcast, or someone who can't get along with people, or Indifferent, and often it just isn't worth it. Society says to be agreeable with your thoughts and emotions, to be a people pleaser, NFP's say no yet we are outnumbered always. The minute I do something that is pleasing and I know in my mind that this isn't something I want to be doing or saying, then yes, I'm being fake and it makes me feel yukky. So sometimes you only have 2 choices, fake it to make everyone happy, or be yourself and piss everyone off, UGG...

If an NFP was being totally genuine and sincere in their thoughts and feelings at all times, we wouldn't be accepted in society in most situations. We are dammed if we do, and dammed if we don't, so fake it til you make it comes to mind.

For example NFP's will not compliment you all the time even if it is expected. NFP's will only give compliments when they are deserving, receiving compliments makes us cringe also. Now a compliment now and again is ok, however too many compliments to an NFP is fake and unreal in our mind.

NFP often see when others are being fake though, and depending on the circumstances and situations sometimes it's easier to play along while gagging in our mind. When NFP are at their most authentic, they are not accepted, because to be honest our Fi is brash, our Te is brash, our Ne is spot on, so if we were to always say it like it is, people wouldn't be so nice to us, so what do we have to do, well we have to walk on egg shells not to offend people, and In my humble opinion if you can't be who you are because you make other people uncomfortable, having to fake your thoughts and emotions, then yes it is fake. If people weren't so darn offended all the time, NFP could be exactly who they are always.

 

I've never been accused outright of being superficial, but I compliment people, well...too much. I practically compliment every person I see on at least two things. I can't help it. I get excited at seeing them, or at whatever awesome thing they just did, and I'm like "hey that was awesome! I really like how_____"

I'm always complimenting my friends' outfits too, and sometimes I get the impression that they don't think I'm being genuine. But I always really mean it! I'm just excited for my friends. What's wrong with that?

I strive to be authentic, but sometimes I feel like people are saying 'how can this possibly be the real you? It's too weird, enthusiastic, and philosophical about everything. And..... weird.'

I am not a people-pleaser. I do want everyone to like me, but I have never been anything but authentic while making friends. I want people to like me for who I really am. I hate being fake and I would never do it. And I want to be understood more than anything, so I'm very open and honest about who I am and what I feel or value.

But, while all my compliments get me some suspicious looks, I have also been told that I'm very open, authentic, and almost too deep. I've actually been told that my openly-deepness can 'scare people.'

 

I just thought of another example of being fake.

I was asked to Judge a beauty pageant many years ago. The girls were Judged in different areas, talent being one . So this one girl gets up to sing, OMG this poor girl was horrible at singing. And although she was amazing in other areas singing was not her forte.

3 Judges Including myself had to score her 1, lowest, 10 highest. I think I gave her a 3 or 4, and even that was too much, because if I was keeping it real and honest she should have gotten a 1. The other Judges scored her really high, 8-10, I couldn't believe it, I mean anyone who was being honest with themselves knew she couldn't sing. So who is being fake in this situation, me for giving her points that she didn't deserve, or the others who later admitted she did a horrible job but felt sorry for her ? She ended up winning the competition . Her score from the talent part of the competition put her ahead of a few other girls who were much more deserving. If everyone was being honest she wouldn't have won, but because they were lying to themselves she came out the winner. Now could I have prevented the outcome, yes I could, I could have argued that her singing was horrible and she wasn't deserving a high score, I would have been honest, not fake, but this is the way the world works. If I had done this I would have been the big meany, the bully, the cruel bitch for keeping it real>>>>><<<<<< and tis is why NFP have to settle for the fake side of life often, this is only a very small example of how society works, how people who want to be real have to be fake, but at the end of the day it isn't NFP that is fake, it is everyone else around us that has this ugly need to be so darn pleasing all the freaking time.

 

My experience with ENFPs in social settings make me think that you guys are among the more genuine... more so than most of the introverted types anyway, because they tend to have to utilize a more outgoing persona in order to live up to what they perceive to be expected of them in a social context. I usually associate Fe-users with being fake, not the majority of them of course. It's just... I don't know. I guess that when an Fe-user does engage in this behaviour of giving positive comments right and left, it runs the risk of coming across as something that they do because "that's what you're supposed to do", rather than there being an actual core of appreciation behind it. The whole talk-show persona just seems like a caricature of the worst aspects of Fe.

That being said, I think most people who one might describe as "fake" is being completely sincere with what they do, and I think that most of the people seeing them as fake are just doing so because they cannot see themselves naturally behaving in that way, which must logically mean that everyone who does is faking it. I know that's how I thought when I was younger.

 

I try to hide my true thoughts and feelings to avoid conflict or hurting people. However, the conflict between my head and my heart is open for everyone to see. That could make a lot of S type people feel like I am fake.


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I dont think ENFP are fake. My friend is an ENFP & when he didnt like something, he tried to explain & that in the cutest way Ive ever seen. I know that ENFP tries to avoid conflict & that make me sometimes feel guilty when I was mad at him, cos u guys are so loveable.
His comment neg/pos seem really honest & authentic to me. Maybe the way of speaking? Or how to express it? I dont know

 

I used to be friends with an ENFP, hanging around with him he would just say what made other people happy, he didnt seem to have any of his own idea's or personality.

He claimed he never had a reason to say NO to an activity. When I asked him if there wasnt something he actually wanted to do himself, he didnt have any answer.

Everything he said around me was geared to making me happy, none of it was real. Just emotional manipulation.

Any questions, he would just respond Im being logical not emotional.

All in all he is the sneakiest manipulator I have ever encountered. And the biggest supplicator.

Going out drinking with him was even worst, he started giving my drinks away to girls, then he started apologising for me to girls over stuff Im not sorry about.

I dont know if all ENFP's are like this but it left a very sour taste in my mouth.

 

Under the surface, I don't think I get along well with my ENTJ dad for the very characteristics you've listed in your analysis of ENFPs. I've always sensed that my dad saw me as a sneaky manipulator no matter my intentions. As a result, I've always felt judged and unwelcome by him (under the surface of things). However, because of our relationship, I would try to keep peace by never telling him what I actually thought or felt because I knew we would never agree and it would just cause a huge fight. If I disagreed with him deep inside, I would just try to gloss it over by hanging on the fringe of the subject but never touching its heart.

The last time I even tried to voice my true opinion, he told me that I was too stubborn/stuck in my own ways and that I had an answer for everything. It annoyed him that I had an answer for everything. To him, that was manipulation and not logical.

To be perfectly honest, if he weren't my dad, I would not be caring to make him happy by avoiding conflict at all. He'd just be a far away acquaintance I'd avoid so that I don't have to feel uncomfortable all the time hiding my true opinions from his judgmental/stubborn glare.


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I have to apologize because I actually have accused ENFPs of being fake for the most part....maybe it's just your rawness plus your extraversion (which I lack). I am an introvert but an outgoing introvert...maybe even an Ambivert...and I actually get accused of being "fake" too or even "flirty" but I just love people and I love conversation. It's not like I'm touchy either (cause I hate being touched). I encourage you to just be you and not to care what anyone says about you <3

 

Yeah, when I'm being my true self with someone who isn't used to it, they think I'm overacting and being a drama queen. Of course, because I am very expressive and emotional,you're just not used to see it.