Impossible? No.

 

Do you have any evidence or theoretical explanation in regards to why it's possible?

 

I'm an INFJ, and I interact with a certain ESFP on a daily basis. Yes, family. Im just going to insert one little problem I face. While it is quite infuriating I wont lie, when we hit it off we really do well together. Providing a nice balance socially. But once we disagree on something there is no other way that I knew of other than leaving them be to cool off. Because, as my Ni and J stands although we both hate conflict I am most inclined to seek a reason to why they disagree and am open to correction. Most of the time they fail to see that(?) and just wouldnt bother to explain a thing. Although when they strongly believe in something for example someone doing something wrong/unredeemable from their prespective they will confront you. But its best to try and really avoid feeling negativity when near them at all cost as my experience with some of ESFPs I know is... Not one i'd like to look back to. Sorry I didnt mean to seem negative ^^

 

This is rather useful, but at least you can be in touch with your feelings with both yourself and others, I can't do that to my knowledge. Others emotions aren't important to me and to ESFPs and many other types they mean great significance. They think that if you don't express your emotions or don't care for family, relationships, or other people then you're a lonely, cold-hearted, ruthless, violent organsim who doesn't deserve to live. Contrary to what others may assume, I do care about others, but in the form of a global scale and of the entire world population as well as issues we're in now for which I want to resolve. How can I possibly be able to socialize with others with this form of thinking?

 

I totally see what you mean about expressing things, definitely what my ESFP friends does all the time. But please dont be so hard on yourself, just caring about current issues meant that you care about their well beings even if its seemingly from afar. You just need to learn how to make it seem more that way. Or dont, best you do though if socializing is still a priority.
In my experience it does depends on each individual as the ESFPs I encounter are, while sharing the same attributes, different in terms of approach. Some even finds me/other introverts endearing, and almost all of them engage me in funny remarks XD once you get closer you'll see that theyre more than what they seem in terms of thoughts so thats the nice part. I occasionally exchange thoughts about current events with them and its amusing I promise.

When you socialize, try to make the people your goal for a moment. It doesnt matter how you view them because you wouldnt even think about it when it happen. As long as you give an amount of attention to them when you're socializing, to the extend you're able to of course. Isn't that how your friends caught you?

(If not how did they get to be your friend i'd like to know because keeping friends exhaust me)

 

How old are you?

 

We probably won't see eye to eye in many ways but that doesn't mean you can't become friends with an ESFP

 

They are our complete opposites, but it's possible to relate to any person really. I've found ESFPs to be either super annoying or super lovable if they're balanced (that goes for any personality I guess). Besides, I get along with ENFP and ESFJ pretty well, and both of those are "cousins" to the ESFP, so in theory it's not impossible right?

 

I ain't no one's fucking cousin. :kitteh:

Screw type, just try screwing her first. See what happens.

That's my advice.

 

I suppose it's easier to relate to people you have something in common with. Just think: INTJ and ESFP have same functions. Perhaps we're both independent and a well-developed INTJ and ESFP should get in fine with each other. Don't worry about it

Opposites attract sometimes. You may both be fascinated by your differences (as well as similarities). Just try to be more accepting and less critical/judging - try to almost be a bit more like them sometimes - that way you may understand them better

 

INTJ here, with an ESFP best friend. We can relate a lot to each other, and just because we're so different, we make a good team!

 

Just treat them as people and have interactions with them that foster that a personal connection

 

I have a good friend who is an intj. She is very logical and organized and smart. We are very different. She does not readily express emotion, as I do. She keeps her feelings inside, rather than letting them spill out of her. I very much appreciate her for who she is.

 

I can understand that, but what if I have to deal with such a type in the workplace or under certain circumstances that are not in my favour and things that I cannot immediatley depart from? The majority of people, not just ESFPs, don't know me very well. I think that if any ESFP were to actually get to know me for how complex I am and what I spend the majority of my time doing, I think it would result in them either despising me or wondering why I'm even concerned with current affairs or the issues we're in now let alone why I've been coming up with solutions to such issues.

 

Socionics says we're supposed to get along really well, so maybe you should look into how the socionics functions interact between the two?

If you're going into a friendship with one of us, definitely don't let the ESFP know that you're just doing it to advance your position. That'll make them instantly dislike you. If at all possible, I'd suggest making friends for friendship's sake and going at it from there. ESFPs are also likely to know if you're trying to use them, as our Ni often works in paranoid feelings (such as believing that someone is just using us). I catch on very quickly when someone's intentions are bad.

I suggest looking for maturity in a person, not type. By that, I mean look for people who are willing to be reasonable and work through problems with you. I find that two mature types can interact well no matter what they are - it just takes communication and an attempt at understanding. If you associate with ESFPs who are immature, you can bet you're gonna have a tough time - but a mature ESFP can be a delight to work with, as with any other type. Good luck!

 

Not on the grounds of you being INTJ. Maybe because of limits you impose on yourself as an individual, though.

 

I must say I like the thoroughness of the opening post. Very reasonable and sticking to the objective.

Afaik the ESFP isnt the INTJs direct opposite since both share the same 4 functions.

My advice is to continue what you're doing. There will always be difficult people, no matter what you feel about them or err think about them, you may need them so keep your cool and treat them well. You may despise them on the inside but on the outside you have to keep cool.

 

ESFPs are great!! I have an ESFP friend in uni and I absolutely love her. She's one of my closest friends and I trust her. She always has my back whenever we go out. Since I suck at small talks, whenever someone tries to talk to me she just gets into the convo and make the situation less awkward.

 

I'm an INTJ and one of my best friends is an ESFP. How did that happen? I'm still trying to figure that out myself. Anyway, he has a lot of great qualities and spending time with him has made me more social and more open to new experiences.

He likes my unpredictable nature (unpredictable by his estimation) and thinks my serious approach to recreational activities is amusing. He said he never knows what is going to come out of my mouth. I take that as a compliment.

We butt heads on some things, naturally. But we get along quite well.